Turning Tables
by callistawolf
Summary: The Doctor has a chance to show Reinette the stars, but at what cost? Rose is at a crossroads and must decide which path to take to lead herself to a better life.


Notes

This is the story I wrote for NaNoWriMo 2012. It's all finished and is in the middle of being beta'd so I thought I'd post it now. This first chapter sets up the action to follow so there's a good deal of introspection. **THIS IS A REPOSTED FIC FROM SEVERAL YEARS AGO. I deleted my DW fics and now I've reloaded them. As such, they are now all chapters included in one file. There may be some formatting issues. Be advised.**

 **Chapter 1**

Rose shut the door behind her and leaned back against it, her eyes wide and her heart pounding. She'd excused herself to her room as soon she could without appearing too rude. She just... needed to be alone to process this news. Life on board the TARDIS, as well as her relationship with the Doctor, had turned around so quickly that she swore she felt whiplash.

The five and a half hour wait for any indication that the Doctor would return had been agonizing. She and Mickey had waited for anything that would indicate the Doctor was coming back for them and the TARDIS. Mickey had called her a fool more than once for believing in him. But she had to, didn't she? He'd never let her down... before.

Even so, her faith had wavered a little towards the end of the wait. Her mind raced with the possibilities of what could be going on in 18th Century France with Reinette and the Doctor. She'd even let herself wonder, just a little, if maybe he wasn't looking so hard for a way back to them as she'd hoped he was.

In the end, of course, he had been looking for a way back and just like that, he'd bounded back to them all grins and manic energy. It had been so good to see him that she'd had to bite back a sob at the mere sight of his tousled hair and rumpled suit. Consequences be damned, in that moment she had wanted to pull him down to her by his lapels and give him the snog of a lifetime.

That is, until it became apparent that he was going back to France. To fetch Reinette. He'd asked her to travel with them and of course she had accepted. Who would turn such an opportunity down? You did, a voice in her head reminded her. You turned him down the first time he asked. Yes, well, never let it be known that she wasn't just a little bit on the thick side.

And that was part of her problem now, wasn't it? She was nothing special and she'd always known this. Still, even beside the Doctor, who could always amaze her with his vast knowledge of planets and species and customs and histories without hardly breaking a sweet, she'd been able to accept herself as she was. He seemed to be delighted with her as she was so she had no reason to question it. She realized now, of course, that she'd been a fool of epic proportions.

Rose crossed her cluttered (and suddenly rather childish) room and slumped down onto the corner of her bed. Until yesterday... ?. She glanced at the clock she kept on her bedside table which was always set to London time. No, it was the day before yesterday now. Just barely. No wonder she felt so exhausted. The day before yesterday, though, she had thought perhaps he loved her but he could not act on it. Now, here today, she realized he could act on it and therefore had to consider the idea that maybe he didn't act on it because he didn't want to. She felt sick at the thought.

She had to admit that it had started before yesterday. Before France. Because meeting Sarah Jane had shone a light on something that she hadn't even considered existed. Now, here, on the other side of it all, Rose wondered why she hadn't considered that he'd have traveled with other humans before. That he could even have traveled with other human women. He'd told her that he was 900 years old. It just made sense that in 900 years he had to have spent considerable time with humans; he seemed to know and understand them so well, after all.

Sarah Jane had come as quite a shock to Rose and she felt embarrassed now when she recalled her reaction to the older woman. The only thing that kept her from feeling completely horrible about it was that Sarah had seemed to be just as thrown off by Rose. Luckily, they had bonded easily enough and Rose had found that she genuinely liked the other woman. Clearly, the Doctor had great taste. Which had to mean that she was someone special as well, after all he had told Adam that he only traveled with the best and had indicated that he considered her the best. Still, she was thinking that she wasn't the sort of special that she really wanted to be to him. She wanted to be the kind of person that the Doctor could love and want to give part of himself to.

How silly it was of her to hope that she would be that for him. Here she had hoped that she would attract the affections of a man who was a genius and who had lived for lifetimes and met all sorts of people. She knew he was fond of her, perhaps even loved her in his own way. But she was still just a London shop girl and there was nothing remarkable to draw his attraction to her in that way. Even Sarah Jane had seemed so much more poised than she herself was. After all of the people he had traveled with over the many years, Rose imagined that she faded more into the background than she stood out. Certainly she was important to the Doctor but she doubted she was romantic partner material. Reinette, and the Doctor's clear fascination with her, only served to underscore this newest insecurity.

Reinette was everything that she was not. Poised, confident, stunningly beautiful, educated and important. Rose had to admit that Reinette had an undeniable sexual charisma. Then there was the Doctor, who in his new regeneration seemed to have an extra helping of "shameless flirt" added into the mix, and she knew that one plus one equals two.

She felt an ache in her chest, threatening to steal her breath. She had no claim on him, never had. She had made certain assumptions about their relationship and how he felt about her, but they were just that. Assumptions. He was certainly free to swan off and romance any bird (or bloke) he came into contact with. She knew this, logically. Her heart, on the other hand, had other ideas. Her heart was screaming out in refusal of the Doctor being romantically linked to anyone but herself. And she had no idea how to handle how she felt about that.

She didn't want to be that girl. The girl who sulks around in the background or makes snide remarks about the other woman or who clings onto the man in question and begs him to just notice her already. Just thinking about acting that way and what the Doctor would think of her made her ill. No, she would handle this as gracefully as she could. And if she found she couldn't handle it gracefully? Well... well, she would cross that bridge when she got to it.

She hoped she'd never get to that bridge.

Rose leaned back and took a few deep breaths. She'd made her excuses in the console room, as Reinette came aboard, saying that she needed to go visit the ladies. She'd been holed up here in her room, gathering her wits and resolve, for a good ten minutes now. While it was optimistic at best to think that anyone was actually missing her presence, she should rejoin Mickey, Reinette and the Doctor sooner rather than later. It was silly to think so, but she felt like she should act the part of a generous host. The situation was definitely not ideal, but Reinette was along for the ride, and Rose wanted her to feel comfortable and welcomed. No, she would not be that girl.

She stopped in her en suite briefly to run a brush through her hair and make sure her makeup wasn't smudged. As she looked at her reflection, she was reminded of what she must look like side by side with Reinette. She thought of the French girl's hand-made silk brocade gown, crafted specifically to fit her delicate frame perfectly and eyed her own ratty t-shirt, made in Taiwan. Reinette had beautiful, naturally blonde hair, perfectly pinned into an elegant coif and Rose herself had boxed bleach blonde hair with frayed ends, hanging artlessly around her face. Not even in the same post code. So don't even try, Rose Tyler, the voice told her. She had to admit the voice made some sense.

She took another deep breath before leaving her room and walking briskly down the corridor. Voices drifted from the galley ahead, so she poked her head in as she approached the doorway. Bingo. Sitting at the small table was Reinette, still dressed in her finery and looking ever so much out of place among the futuristic conveniences of the TARDIS galley. Mickey sat across from her, hanging on her every lilting word. Rose cracked a smile and shook her head at that. So that makes all the men on board captivated by the French aristocrat then.

The Doctor was leaning back against the counter, laughing at something Reinette had just said and looking every bit the giddy schoolboy. Rose entered the room, fairly certain of her anonymity. She took place against the cabinets opposite the Doctor and closer to Mickey's elbow. The Doctor inclined his head at her in greeting.

"Glad you've joined us, Rose! We're just showing Reinette around the TARDIS and she mentioned she might like a cuppa. Would you as well?" the Doctor asked.

"Sure, that'd be lovely," Rose replied, hoping she didn't sound too stiff in her inflection. No one seemed to notice. Well, the Doctor peered at her a moment before setting out a cup, but if he noticed her braced shoulders and formal tone he didn't say anything about it. Which was more than fine by her.

"Reinette was just tellin' us something some bloke said in front of court just the other day. Hilarious!" Mickey chortled. Rose tried to resist cringing. Normally, Mickey's folksy attitude and friendly behavior was a comfort but here in front of Reinette, she felt embarrassed. She shamed herself for even thinking it. Mickey was still her best friend, even if they were long past the time they'd been a couple. She and Mickey had stopped sleeping together when she'd first started traveling with the Doctor... seemed a lifetime ago. He'd shown interest in rekindling the relationship several times, including when she'd been at home at Christmas with the newly regenerated Doctor. But Rose had already been lost to him by then. There were no other men on her radar than the Doctor, for better or for worse.

It seemed that it was definitely "for worse", now. She chastised herself for thinking it, but this interest in Reinette was measurably worse than anything she'd gone through with the Doctor. Well, relationship-wise that is. What she wouldn't give right now for a Slitheen or a Dalek or a werewolf. Those were the good old days.

She was doing it, she realized. She was withdrawing and pulling in and now they were all looking at her strangely. She realizes someone (Reinette? Mickey?) must have asked her a question and she didn't even hear it for all the buzzing going on in her head. She opens her mouth to speak and nothing comes out and the looks become more concerned and... is that pity?

Bile rising in her throat, Rose mumbled a quick and quiet, "I'm sorry." She turned quickly and darted from the room, anxious to just get away from those looks.

She ended up in the library without remembering making any conscious decision to go there. The library is one of her most favorite rooms on board the TARDIS, however, so it made some amount of sense to seek quiet and comfort here. Who knew, maybe the TARDIS led her here, knowing she needed the musty smell of books, the crackling fireplace and the earthy, wooden surroundings.

She sunk down onto her favorite overstuffed, faded green sofa and put her head into her hands. She had to get a grip. Come on, Rose Tyler, you're made of stronger stuff than this.

"Rose?" a familiar voice interrupted her thoughts. "Are you all right?"

She looked up to see the Doctor standing over her, a frown and a furrowed brow. "Oh. Uhm, I'm fine, Doctor. Just... tired, I guess."

He still looked skeptical as he sat down beside her. "I can tell there's something on your mind. You've been... quiet. Since I came back from France."

Rose gnawed on her lip nervously. What could she say here? She couldn't tell him the truth, that much was obvious. But she couldn't put him off with another remark about being tired or being fine. She could tell by the set of his jaw that he was determined to figure her out.

"I just... I guess I miss it being just you and I," she finally admitted. Then she blew out a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding in. It wasn't the whole truth, of course, but it was enough of the truth that she was fairly certain he'd be satisfied.

The Doctor looked thoughtful and perhaps even a little uncomfortable and Rose covered a wince. The last thing she wanted was him to think she was playing the part of the jealous companion again. Even if, technically, she was. "Mickey is great and I'm sure... I'm sure Reinette and I will get along wonderfully. I was just thinking about some of our past adventures, is all," she hurried to explain. Off his questioning look, she added, "Not that I think we won't have some great adventures, the four of us. I just am... adjusting. To the idea."

He looked into her eyes and she had the unnerving feeling that he could see clear down into her soul. It made her feel uncomfortable and small. "We've had a group before. Remember Jack?" he asked softly.

Sore subject. Of course she remembered Jack. Dashing, charming, devil-may-care Jack. She also remembered the Doctor, in his previous incarnation, being downright possessively jealous of Jack. Oh, how the tables have turned. "How could I forget Jack?" she murmured, remembering his wide grin and twinkling eyes.

He looked pained and she wondered briefly why. Was there something he wasn't telling her about Jack?

"Anyhow, it was different with Jack. You were different," she reminded him. Sometimes, oh, sometimes she really missed who he was before Christmas. Before the regeneration. Would he have swanned off to 18th Century France and left her and Mickey stranded? Would he have brought Madame de Pompadour back with him?

At least he had the decency to look chagrined as he rubbed the back of his neck. "That might be true enough. But having more than one extra person at a time traveling on the TARDIS is nothing new for me, Rose," he told her.

She thought again about Sarah Jane and the others she didn't know about. She wondered how many there had been. Had he been in love with any of them? "I realize that, Doctor," she said, trying not to sound as exasperated as she felt. "And honestly, it's okay. I'm fine with it. I was just being... nostalgic."

"Oh," he said, leaning back. He didn't seem to know what to make of what she'd said. He fell quiet, obviously thinking about something.

"I think I'll just go to bed. I'm not feeling very hungry... I just need a kip," she said, getting to her feet. He watched her stand, just nodding at her. It crossed her mind to ask him what he was thinking, but she quickly dismissed it. She was far too tired and emotionally wrought to try to keep up with him anyhow.

She left the library, leaving him still seated on the sofa, and made her retreat to the relative safety of her bedroom.

The Doctor was confused. Very confused. Rose was acting very strange. It wasn't like her to act so withdrawn and reticent. Usually, if something was bothering her, a little prodding from him was all it took for her to fess up. But just now, he had the distinct impression she was hiding something from him and that bothered him very much indeed.

His relationship with Rose was complicated and something he tried to spend as little time dwelling on. She meant more to him than he was comfortable with. She had saved him from a very dark place when he'd met her, she'd been the one thing that kept him grounded in those early days after the Time War. When he'd assured her outside of that chippy just the other day that he would not leave her behind like he had left the others, he meant it. It was that special relationship that made him worry. It wasn't... prudent. Allowing himself to get so close to a human companion was certainly looked down on by the other Time Lords. While they weren't around anymore to raise a fuss, he felt obligated to respect his culture. After all, it was his fault they weren't around any longer and so it was his responsibility to keep their traditions intact. That meant keeping a respectable distance between him and Rose, despite what his hearts and his hormones told him.

He didn't even think that Rose felt the same. After all, in the hospital basement in 1941 England, she'd indicated that she didn't think of him that way. She'd said she hadn't thought of him as a man who would be interested in her the way Jack had been. She'd even been surprised that he danced, for Rassilon's sake. He knew Rose valued him as a good friend but he was unsure if her feelings for him went any deeper than that. After all, he was over 900 years old and an alien to boot. An alien who could change his entire appearance. What human woman would want to deal with all of that? He would never strain their relationship just because of his own misguided feelings. She meant far too much to him.

He'd very nearly given in, too. His regeneration had changed him, made him more tactile and his emotions bubbled closer to the surface than they had before. He'd let his guard down, flirting shamelessly with Rose and drawing her ever closer to him until the attraction was virtually impossible to deny any longer. His urge to grab her and kiss her until she went pliant in his arms after their adventure in 1879 Scotland had been a big wake up call for him. He'd hardly been able to take his eyes off all during that adventure, despite the danger they had faced. Her wide smile and her incredibly short denim dress had aroused his interest in more than one way and his fingers had itched to plunge into her hair, his body had ached to feel her pressed against him.

Then, a few days ago, Mickey had called them back to Earth. His presence, along with the joy of seeing Sarah Jane again had given the Doctor some much needed distance from Rose, some time to regather his resolve. He'd been more than happy to invite Mickey along after that, knowing he would serve as a suitable distraction. The Doctor knew he'd be more likely to keep his distance from Rose with her ex-boyfriend on board. Perhaps it was a cowardly move on his part, but then again, he'd been shaken by his growing feelings for Rose.

Of course, having Mickey along hadn't prevented the Doctor from longing for Rose, simply from acting on it. What resulted was a simmering frustration that he was well out of practice in dealing with. So maybe the spaceship and 18th century France and Reinette had served as an unplanned distraction from the frustration. And, the utterly brilliant snog he'd shared with Madame had felt like something of a release as well. He soothed his guilty conscience by telling himself that he hadn't initiated the snog. Then he reminded himself that technically he had nothing to feel guilty about.

Bugger.

Reinette had shown such an interest in his life and the stars that it had been an easy decision to invite her along with them. He was always excited to have a new companion on board and Mickey's enthusiasm had fueled his own. But then Rose had seemed less than enthused. Come to think of it, it hadn't been unlike the lack of enthusiasm she'd shown when Mickey had come on board. Maybe she was getting ill. He'd have to see if he could coax her into the medbay so he could run a few tests. He knew he'd feel better if she had a clean bill of health.

"What'choo doin' in here, boss?" Mickey asked, breaking the Doctor out of his thoughts. The other man stood in the doorway to the library. "Aren't we goin' to show Reinette the rest of the ship?"

"I was just talking to Rose, a moment ago," the Doctor explained. "She said she was feeling tired, was going to head to bed early."

Mickey's brow furrowed with concern. He gave the Doctor an appraising look. "You've really mucked it up now, you know," he told him, more than just a hint of derision in his voice.

The Doctor got to his feet and glanced at Mickey. "What on Earth are you talking about?"

"Rose," he clarified. "First you rub her face in the ex, showing her that she's just the latest in a long line, and then you bring her replacement on board. Not too clever, that."

He fought the urge to roll his eyes. He was getting more than a little tired of Mickey's constant jibing about the "ex-wife" and "every man's nightmare". Moreover, he was sure Rose didn't appreciate the insinuation. She might love him as a friend, and he was certain that she did, but he seriously doubted her feelings went much further than that.

"Mickey," he said on a sigh, trying to reign in his frustration. "What is your point? Or do you have one?"

He stepped forward and made a show of looking the Doctor up and down. "If you can't figure this out, mate, then you've got bigger problems," he told him. "I'm going to go see if Rose needs anything."

He turned and left the room leaving the Doctor bristling behind him. It hacked him off that Mickey was acting so superior... like he knew something about Rose that he, the Doctor, did not. Why, the mere notion was ludicrous. He easily knew Rose better than anyone else in all the universe. At least... he thought he did. His brow furrowed as he mulled over the day's events. Maybe, and this was a very big maybe, he didn't know Rose as well as he thought.

There was a soft knocking at her bedroom door and Rose stiffened for a moment thinking it might be the Doctor. A soft, "Rose?" a moment later told that it was Mickey. She was so choked up with relief that it took her a moment to reply.

"Come in," she called. She was laying on her bed, on top of the purple-pink duvet and staring at the ceiling. She was trying, yet again, not to feel too sorry for herself. She was failing miserably. A visit from one of her oldest friends sounded like just the thing.

The door opened and Mickey peeked around the edge of the door. Seeing Rose sprawled out on the bed, he stepped inside, closing the door behind him. He sat down next to her and took her hand in a gesture of comfort.

"How are you doing?" he asked her gently.

Rose's forehead crinkled. "I'm fine, Mickey."

He snorted. "Sure you are. Rose, I know you. I've known you forever. You're not fine, you've got something bothering you, I can tell."

She sighed, closing her eyes. She should have known that Mickey would see through her. Not like it was hard to, she imagined. Despite her best efforts, she didn't think she'd been acting terribly subtle that night. "It's just been... a long day," she finally said.

Mickey snorted. "Tell me about it. I thought we were in it bad there for a while there. But you were right, weren't you? The Doctor did get back to us."

She tried to focus on the truth of that. He did come back. He hadn't just left them. It doesn't have to mean anymore than that. She didn't have to think about how went through the mirror not knowing if he could return. "Yes, he did," she said, hoping her voice sounded strong and sure.

There was a small pause and she could tell he was thinking about what to say. "Thing is, he didn't just come back alone now, did he?" he finally asked.

Rose groaned. She released his hand and rolled over so her back was to him. "No, he didn't," she said. "What are you getting at, Mick?"

"I'm not stupid, you know," he said and she was so surprised at his harsh tone that she rolled back over and looked at his face. He wore a determined and slightly sad expression. "I know how it is with you two. A fool could see it. A tin dog could see it."

She sighed. "Mickey, it's not like that with us. We're not... together."

"Oh, I fully believe he hasn't said anything or made any moves. He makes like he's this impressive guy, all bravado and action hero," Mickey explained. "But I wager he's a chicken underneath all that. At least about you."

She closed her eyes and prayed for strength. "You've been watching too many movies. He doesn't think of me that way. I'm just his companion."

He snorted again. "The both of you are something else. Denying up and down what the rest of us can see right off. I don't know how you stand it, honestly."

"Mickey..." she began.

"Listen. I know you love him. And in his way, he loves you too. Bringing Reinette on board, well, that's got to hurt you. He didn't even ask you about it, he just asked her on."

She felt a lump form in her throat. "He doesn't need my permission," she murmured.

"Rose, yes he does," Mickey said firmly and she looked at her old friend, her ex-boyfriend, and saw the seriousness in his eyes. It made the lump in her throat grow two sizes. "You care about him and he might be a coward but he's not blind and he's got to know that doing this hurts you."

"I'll be okay, Mick," she said, wincing at how weak her voice sounded to her own ears.

"I don't doubt that you will, you're Rose Tyler. Thing is, just because we're over you and I, doesn't mean that I like to see you get hurt. And this is hurting you."

Tears sprung to her eyes and she blinked furiously trying to clear them. "You always know just what to say, Mickey," she said.

He made a noise and waved his hand dismissively. "I think now, now that I've seen you two and the life you're leading and what you do everyday and the person you've become... I think maybe we were never really meant to be together like that. I would have held you back."

She sat up then, blinking at him. "Mickey, don't be ridiculous," she chided him.

"I'm not being ridiculous. Listen to me, Rose. I know we can't get back together. I know that now. But that doesn't mean I won't always be here to support you. Whatever you decide to do," he told her, looking about as earnest as she'd ever seen him.

It hit her then that while she'd grown and changed since traveling with the Doctor, Mickey had grown and changed too. And maybe they hadn't grown together so much as they had grown apart, but they were still friends. She was still convinced that she didn't deserve him.

"C'mere," she said, opening her arms and reaching for him. He scooted closer and wrapped her in a warm hug. "Thanks, Mick. You're the best."

"And so are you. Don't you forget that," he insisted before squeezing her tighter.

He left after that, in search of the galley and some dinner. He promised to bring her a sandwich since she was reluctant still to leave her room. She lay back down on the top of the duvet and stared at the ceiling again. She'd give herself this one night to sulk and feel sorry for herself. Tomorrow, they'd land somewhere and embark on a new adventure. She needed to be her old self for it.

She'd be pleasant with Reinette, friendly with the Doctor, chummy with Mickey and she'd be just fine. She could do this. She would do this. With any luck, Reinette would quickly discover that this life wasn't for her and would ask to be taken back home.

Hey, a girl could dream.

 **Chapter 2**

Chapter Summary

The Doctor wants to wow his companions, particularly Reinette, with a special trip to a special place. Will this be the last straw for Rose?

Again, HUGE thanks to foxmoonfade for her fantastic beta work on this story. Her help has been invaluable!

Rose woke up the next day filled with resolve. This whole situation, it wasn't so bad. As she'd told Mickey the night before, she and the Doctor weren't in any sort of relationship anyhow. Even if they were, she could share him with someone else as long as it was purely friendship. Surely it was, right? Just because he flirted with Reinette, that shouldn't mean anything. She'd been watching this new Doctor in action for a few months now, he flirted with just about everyone.

It reminded her a bit of Jack, to be honest. Except there was no bite behind his bark.

She showered and dressed in what she thought of as sensible clothes. She picked some dark jeans and a plain blouse with a stylish coat to wear over it. The coat was a dark navy wool that skimmed the middle of her thighs and she thought it made her look rather fashionable. She laced up her trainers, it was always good to be prepared around the Doctor, checked her makeup in the mirror and then left to find the others.

Everyone was assembled in the console room. Rose found it interesting that Reinette was wearing regular clothing. The TARDIS wardrobe had provided her with a pair of black slacks and a gold blouse over which she wore a long, dark, shining trench coat. She looked stunning. Rose began to think that Reinette could wear a paper sack and look stunning. Her hair was pulled back in a sleek but sensible chignon. She looked cautious yet curious as she stood next to the Doctor's side. They were both talking and smiling and the Doctor looked utterly entranced with her. Rose swallowed her jealousy and crossed the room to Mickey's side, patting his arm as she stood next to him.

He leaned down to her ear. "Doing okay?" he asked quietly. She nodded at him and gave him a smile to assure him. He smiled back.

"So where are we off to today, Doctor?" Rose asked. The Doctor looked up, just now noticing that she'd entered the room and smiled at her warmly. He broke away from Reinette and skipped around the console, his usual bouncy and enthusiastic self. Seeing him like this, his usual self (well, as usual as he was anymore these days), actually did a lot to put her at ease. She could do this.

"Today, we're off to someplace very special! You might remember it," the Doctor announced, looking ever so terribly pleased with himself as he threw the parking brake and the TARDIS leapt into movement.

Rose could only imagine where he was taking them. Reinette looked excited but in a very poised and dignified sort of way. How did she do that? Mickey was grinning.

"Does this mean an actual alien planet, boss?" he asked the Doctor.

The Doctor tugged on his ear. "More or less."

Rose got a bit of an uneasy feeling that she quickly tried to quash. An alien planet that was more or less an alien planet. The conjured up images of apple grass and flying cars in Rose's mind. Surely, she was jumping to silly conclusions. Reinette flashed her a nervous grin and she smiled back. At the very least, it was going to be exciting watching Reinette experience her first trip in the TARDIS.

The TARDIS landed with her typical shudder and thud. Mickey looked like a kid on Christmas and Rose was reminded that this was his first planet as well. She rocked up on the balls of her feet, feeling excited as well, biting her lip and trying to hold back her giddiness in light of Reinette's more restrained excitement. This was the Doctor's favorite part, wasn't it? Seeing the Universe through a fresh pair of (hopefully impressed) eyes?

"Ladies and Gentleman, welcome..." The Doctor paused while he strode to the doors and flung them open with a flourish. "To New Earth!"

Rose's heart sunk to her knees. He was right, she did remember it. She rubbed her arms and plastered a smile on her face, reminding herself that just because it meant something special to her didn't mean that it meant something special to him. Really, for all she knew, he could take all his new girls to New Earth. Wasn't that just a cheerful thought? Every day she seemed to learn something that drove home just how not special she was.

They all stepped out of the doors and onto a city street. Flying cars zoomed over their heads, gleaming glass buildings towered into the clouds and the people walking by barely gave them any notice as they hurried along, dressed in their futuristic garments. Both Reinette and Mickey were gawking at everything and anything all at once. Rose found it comforting that at least she couldn't smell any apple grass.

"This is New London!" The Doctor announced, grinning proudly. "Different from the New New York we visited before, remember Rose?"

"Yes, I remember," she replied.

He seemed to expect her to say something else and a small expression of disappointment crossed his features for a moment before he covered it with another big grin. He launched into the same explanation of New Earth for Reinette and Mickey that he had given her a couple months ago when they'd come for a visit.

"This is simply incredible," Reinette was saying. "Everything looks so different!"

"This is a whole different planet?" Mickey asked. "You're sure you're not having us on, bringing us back to the same one?"

"Of course not, Mr. Mickey! This planet is in the M87 galaxy, lightyears away from where Earth used to be located. You know, before the sun expanded," the Doctor explained.

Rose only half listened as they strolled along the street. Reinette walked ahead, holding onto the Doctor's elbow and leaning in towards him as he spoke about New London. She felt a bit like a third wheel and took Mickey's hand in hers, if only to feel more grounded. New London was similar enough to the old London she knew but still so completely different that it wasn't hard for her to believe this was a different planet altogether. Sure, the signs for the underground were the same, but the trees looked different and the accents even sounded slightly different and the air just felt... different. As they walked and the Doctor prattled on like an overexcited tour guide, she noticed the recreated landmarks that she knew so well, noticing the obvious differences and enjoying the minor differences that the Doctor was all too happy to point out to them. The London Eye, for instance, was about half the size as it had been back on Earth, but Tower Bridge was painted blue.

"And now, here we have the New Royal Opera House," the Doctor said as they approached a somewhat familiar looking building decorated with elegant Grecian columns on the outside. He told them all that it was a very good likeness considering the builders had only pictures and videos to work from. "I thought we'd catch a show tonight. What do you all say?"

Reinette looked up, wide-eyed at all the tall buildings with a radiant smile on her face. Mickey looked around him skeptically, his hands stuffed in his pockets. Rose fought a growing resentment. How many times had she asked that they go someplace peaceful and just relax and enjoy? And how many times had he told her adventure was so much more fun? Oh, she knew it was an unfair comparison to make. Sometimes they had tried to go someplace quiet, only to have adventure find them anyhow. Still, she couldn't help but recall that for her first trip, he took her to watch her world blow up and she nearly got fried. What does Reinette get? A trip to a planet Rose had thought was special to the two of them to go to an opera. It was hard not to feel at least a little miffed about that.

They found a chippie where they all grabbed a bite to eat. Reinette sat across from the Doctor in a booth and made all the appropriate noises and nodded as the Doctor explained the inherent charms of a traditional chippy, but Rose could tell that the courtesan was less than impressed. Mickey cheerfully plowed through his fish and chips with no complaints.

Rose found that the chips tasted off from what she was used to and wondered if that had to do with the slightly blueish tinge of the potatoes. She asked the vendors for a bottle of vinegar that she could use to dowse them in. They looked puzzled, apparently they usually served chips with a tangy, sweet syrup instead. Rose offered them a taste of the chips with the vinegar and their widened eyes told the story. They proclaimed Rose a genius and started to urge all the customers to try their chips with vinegar instead of syrup. The Doctor beamed at her proudly and jumped up to give her a hug. Rose didn't miss Reinette looking a little sulky off to the side.

Next it was a trip back to the TARDIS to get changed into opera-appropriate wear. Rose was less excited about this than she might have been before, mostly because she had the sneaking suspicion that Reinette would far outshine anything she would choose to wear. Standing in the wardrobe looking at a rack of dresses in her size, Rose mentally slapped herself. She had to stop thinking like this. Who cared what Reinette thought? Or the Doctor, for that matter. The only thing that mattered was what she thought of herself. Nodding her head firmly and steeled with new resolve, Rose selected a lovely powder blue dress and took it back to her room to get ready.

The dress was beautiful, the blue set off nicely with cream colored lace around the neck and wrists. It was classic in its appearance but modern in its construction. What should have pinched at her waist was instead as comfortable as wearing a pair of pajamas. She'd pinned her hair loosely atop her head, letting a few curls dangle around her neck and ears. She'd been nervous to remove her trainers but knew they wouldn't go with such a lovely dress and had put on a pair of matching high heeled sandals instead. Twirling in front of the standing mirror in her room, Rose felt like a new woman.

She exited her room and almost immediately ran into Mickey. He was wearing an honest to god top hat and tails. He grinned at her crookedly and extended his elbow. She accepted it with a matching grin and they walked to the console room together. "You look amazing, Rose," he told her and she blushed.

"Same goes for you, Mr. Smith. Very dapper."

The Doctor was in the console room already and Rose had half expected to see him standing there in his standard brown pinstripes. The breath whooshed right out of her when she saw him fiddling with a control on the console, wearing a full formal tuxedo. The only concession to his style seemed to be the black Converse he wore on his feet. He looked... incredible.

She knew she was gaping at him and at that moment, he looked up to see them enter the room. She tried to look away so that she wouldn't be caught staring at him, but her eyes stayed glued to his when she saw his expression shift. His gaze darkened noticeably, and his eyes left hers to cruise down her figure and back up again. She swallowed thickly, hoping to control the blush that she knew had to be racing across her cheeks and neck.

"You... you look brilliant, Rose," he said and she half expected him to follow it up with "for a human" but he didn't. He opened his mouth to say something else but his eyes flew to a point somewhere behind her. Rose turned around to see what had caught his attention and saw that it was Reinette.

As she'd expected, Reinette looked amazing. She wore a dark green gown that looked as if it had been bespoke just for her. The hem brushed the floor and made a swishing noise as she moved. Her shoulders and neck were on display, showing off the courtesan's fine bone structure. Even Rose had to admit that Reinette looked like royalty (heck, she practically was royalty). She was glad she'd decided not to worry about how she'd measure up against her because she knew in this moment that there was no way she possibly could.

The Doctor exclaimed over Reinette enthusiastically, praising her choice of dress and rushing forward to clasp her hands and brush a chaste kiss against her cheek. Rose focused on the floor, hoping for a wild moment that it would rise up and trip the other woman. She caught her cruel thought and consciously shifted her thoughts away. Mickey nudged her shoulder and grinned at her and she couldn't help but grin back.

They exited the TARDIS, all of them laughing and flushed with the excitement of the evening. Rose was happy to see that Reinette truly did seem to be enjoying herself. She was hanging onto the Doctor's arm, as she had been nearly the whole time they'd been in New London so far. But her smile was wide and genuine and her enthusiasm was infectious. It was hard to resent the woman when she was so polite and charming. The Doctor used his ever-handy psychic paper to get them choice tickets in one of the posh balconies overlooking the stage.

Rose was just settling down in her seat when the Doctor popped through the curtain with an excited expression on his face. "You'll never guess what I just found out!" he exclaimed.

Reinette raised an interested eyebrow and Mickey asked, "What's that, boss?"

The Doctor plopped into his seat carelessly before launching into an elaborate explanation of what it was that he'd learned during his snooping. Because of course he'd been snooping around instead of getting settled in the balcony. This was his way and Rose was well used to it by now. In fact, she'd probably go so far as to say that she depended on it.

Apparently, some of the actors had gone missing recently, under suspicious circumstances. At first, the theater owner had suspected a professional rival. But some of the clues left behind had hinted at something stranger than that. The actors that had disappeared were some of the company's best singers. They'd had to call up almost all the understudies for the principal actors in the last few weeks. The Doctor was obviously excited about investigating this. Reinette looked a little chagrined when it became apparent that he wouldn't be joining them to watch the show. Mickey offered to sit and watch with her and Reinette smiled at him gratefully. Rose suspected it had more to do with his desire to peer down her cleavage than anything else.

Rose offered to help the Doctor sniff around for clues, mostly because she knew that they could cover more ground with the two of them than he could cover on his own. She was interested to find out what was going on as well. It sounded a sight more interesting watching an opera at any rate, not that she'd ever admit that out loud.

They agreed to split up, standard procedure. After all, this way they could cover twice as much ground in the same amount of time. He went to investigate the basement while she went to poke around the backstage. There was enough hustle and bustle with the show starting that no one really questioned her presence and she was able to move about quite easily. She just had to remember to act like she belonged there. There was an open door near the end of the hallway and she could hear the murmur of voices. She edged along the wall until she was standing just outside the doorway. A glance at the door told her it was the dressing room of the leading lady. If she had to guess, the voices inside belonged to her and one of her co-stars. And it just so happened that they were discussing the disappearances.

"Jennilyn was telling me that she saw August just before he went missing. He'd been reading through his lines in the conference room, said he liked it there because it was quiet. As she was leaving, she saw this... thing," the first voice explained.

"Thing? What sort of thing?" the second voice asked.

"It was... like a person. But not? Perhaps an off-worlder. It was strange enough, whoever it was, for Jennilyn to remember," the first person answered.

"Did she tell this to the cops?" asked the second person. Rose leaned closer to the open doorway to hear the answer but whatever was said was lost to her as a hand pressed over her mouth. Another arm wrapped quickly around her waist and she was jerked away roughly.

The Opera had reached the middle of the second act before the Doctor returned to their balcony seats. Mickey wasn't too bothered, he was enjoying sitting with Reinette and barely noticed that the Doctor had left. Mickey had no clue when it came to the Opera, and Reinette's engaging explanations made him feel at ease. She gestured with grace as she expounded on the story and the characters; he actually found himself growing immersed in the plot after a while.

"I think I've got it figured out," the Doctor announced in a loud whisper to the both of them. Reinette looked a little aggravated to have their opera experience interrupted. She shot the Doctor a look and he gestured at Mickey to pull back out of the curtain to talk to him about it.

"I talked to several of the singers as well as stagehands and apparently these actors aren't just disappearing, they are being abducted," the Doctor told him. "Everyone has taken to calling this... being, the "Phantom". I suspect that's a semi-clever reference to old Earth's "Phantom of the Opera". From the people who think they saw this guy, it doesn't sound like he's human, though I think he's humanoid."

Mickey's brow furrowed. "Why is some alien nutter running around snatching opera singers?"

"I have a theory on that. The first actor who was abducted, the lead male singer, reappeared just yesterday. They found him in the basement, a little bewildered and completely without his voice," the Doctor continued.

"No voice? At all?" Mickey asked.

"Nope. He's at the hospital now, more for observation than anything else since no one can figure out why he's lost his voice. I need to go see him, talk to him, see if I can find out what's going on," the Doctor said, and he looked just as manic as ever. While Mickey knew and understood this was a serious problem, he could also tell that the Doctor loved the thrill of the investigation. This was when he was in his element and he lived for it.

Then Mickey looked around and a strange feeling settled over him. "Where's Rose?" he asked.

The Doctor paused in his pacing to give Mickey a strange look. "I have no idea. We split up to look for clues. She's not here?" he asked. Then he surged forward and pushed past the curtain to inspect the balcony. Reinette looked up in surprise which shifted swiftly to concern when she saw their worried faces.

"What's going on?" she asked.

"You haven't seen Rose, have you?" the Doctor asked, looking around the balcony as if Rose might be hiding behind a chair or something.

Mickey felt a tickle of frustration in his throat. He'd been here the whole time, with Reinette. Surely if Rose had been by he would have seen her. But the Doctor was on a bit of a tear and he didn't think it was the best time to bring that up.

"No, not since the two of you went off to explore," Reinette replied. "Shouldn't she be with you?"

"We split up," the Doctor mumbled, raking a hand through his hair and causing it to stand more on end than before.

"We should go look for her," Mickey said, feeling decidedly uneasy about the whole situation.

The Time Lord was now scratching at his chin thoughtfully. "It's likely she's still looking around and we just didn't cross paths. I'd really like to go visit this bloke at the hospital. I feel that's the key to finding out what we need to know."

Mickey fought the urge to gape. "You're just going to leave?"

"Rose is fine, Mickey," the Doctor insisted, his voice going low and almost threatening. "She'd want me to get to the bottom of this."

Mickey rocked back on his heels, blinking. He was stunned at the other man's reaction to this. "I guess you better get it done then," he said, his anger showing in the tremble in his voice.

The Doctor nodded briskly. "And, just to be on the safe side, I should take Reinette with me. I think she'll be better off in my care and perhaps her presence will be soothing to this singer." Reinette nodded and stood up from her seat. She seemed more than okay with leaving the show as long as it meant joining the Doctor, smiling as she took hold of his arm.

Mickey found himself fighting a strong urge to punch this alien square in the face. Firstly, for waving aside the whereabouts of Rose. Secondly, for insinuating that anyone was safer in his own presence rather than Mickeys. He rather thought the opposite was looking more to be true but now was not the time to be bringing this up. But lord help the Doctor if something had happened to Rose. Then Mickey would have a go with him, consequences be damned.

"Fine. I'll go look for Rose," Mickey ground out, trying to keep a reign on his temper.

"Good plan. Once you find her, come meet us at the hospital. Just take a cab, they'll know where to find it," the Doctor said and was reaching around in his pockets. He produced a roll of credits which he tossed at him. "We'll see you both there."

He watched the both of them leave the building and tucked his simmering anger down. Right now, he needed to find Rose. That was the priority, whether or not that wanker alien knew it or not.

Rose pulled against the ropes that restrained her. Her hands were tied together behind her back. She was seated on a plain wooden chair and her ankles were tied to the chair legs. She was quite honestly subdued. And she was quite honestly scared out of her mind.

The... creature that had taken her was most definitely an alien. And he was most definitely the one responsible for all these disappearances. She'd found out quite a bit about what was going. It was just a shame that she might not live to share her discoveries with the Doctor. She tried to shake that pessimistic thought from her head as she wiggled more against the ropes. No, she wouldn't be dying today. If nothing else, the Doctor would notice she hadn't returned to the balcony and wonder where she was.

Still, there was that niggling doubt worming its way through her chest. Better attempt to save herself. Just to be sure. Besides, she couldn't always expect the Doctor to save her. There wasn't much room to wiggle her wrists and she could feel the rough fibers of the rope tearing at her skin but she felt she was making a little headway getting her left hand free. Instead of thinking about the pain, she tried to focus on how proud the Doctor would be when he found out she'd not only solved the mystery but that she'd saved herself.

She'd just gotten her right hand free and was fumbling with the knots that restrained her ankles when the door to the room she was in burst open. Mickey stood in the doorway, his eyes wild. "Rose!" he exclaimed and a grin burst on his face. He crossed the room in two strides and dropped down to help her untie her ankles.

"Mickey! How'd you find me? Where's the Doctor?" she asked as she worked. "Nevermind. Tell me when we're out of here. We have to move, he's going to be back here any minute now."

"Who? Who took you, Rose?" Mickey asked, pulling the rope free and working on the rope still tied around her right wrist.

"Alien. He's been abducting the opera singers. Stealing their voices. I'll explain later! Let's shift!" she gasped as she freed her other ankle and leapt to her feet.

She stumbled right away, her limbs stiff and weak from being forced into one position for so long. Mickey caught her easily, steadying her with his hands on her shoulders. "You okay? You got it?" he asked.

She nodded. "Let's go," she said. He took her hand and led her out the door.

They were in the basement of the building next door to the New Royal Opera House. After he'd forced Rose to sing and discovered she didn't have the opera voice he needed, the alien had gone back to the opera to find another singer to abduct since Rose was obviously not up to snuff for what he wanted. Surely he'd be back any minute and when he was, he'd carry out his threat to dispose of her.

As they ascended the stairs to the street, Mickey went over the Doctor's instructions to meet him and Reinette at the hospital where he was interviewing the first survivor of the abductions. Rose shook her head emphatically. "No, I'm going to the opera house to tell them where this alien is operating out of and then I'm going to the TARDIS."

Mickey acquiesced and there was something about the firm set of his jaw that told Rose he was no happier with the Time Lord than she was. They found the theater manager and explained to him what they knew. The authorities were called in right away and the building was surrounded. As luck would have it, the alien in question was captured trying to sneak out with a new singer in his custody. Once Rose had given her statement and was sure that she wasn't needed any longer, she told Mickey that she needed to get to the TARDIS before her knees gave out once and for all.

"What about the Doctor? Shouldn't we find a way to tell him where we are?" Mickey asked as they made their way back to the TARDIS.

Rose waved her hand impatiently. "He'll figure it out, he's so clever. I want to hear your side of the story. While we have a cuppa. I'm in desperateneed of a cuppa."

Soon, they were back at the TARDIS and sitting at the table in the galley, sipping steaming mugs of tea. Rose groaned as she took a drink. "This is gorgeous," she said. "Now tell me, why is the Doctor at the hospital? What happened?"

Mickey opened his mouth start the story but caught sight of her rope burned left wrist. "Rose, you're hurt!"

She glanced at it, unconcerned. "It doesn't hurt so much at the moment. It's not bleeding any longer. Tell me your story, I'll take care of it after we're done with our tea."

Mickey looked uncertain but told her everything that had happened on his end. When he told her how the Doctor had been so... dismissive about her absence, she both felt her heart sink and her blood boil. She wasn't sure what she expected, really, but at least some concern for her wellbeing wouldn't be a bad thing. But he took Reinette with him to the hospital, to keep her safe, she presumed. Her simmering resentment peaked to a boil.

"Thank you, Mickey," she told him, patting his hand as it rested on top of one of hers. "Thank you for coming to find me. How did you find me, anyhow?"

He shrugged. "I expected you and the Doctor had canvassed the opera house pretty well so I thought maybe I should look at the other buildings nearby, see if I found anything. I'd actually looked through two other buildings before finding the one you were in."

"That's brilliant thinking, Micks," she said, grinning at him. She then told him everything she had found out, starting with the conversation she'd eavesdropped on. She told him about this alien, about how he was abducting opera singers because their voices produced a certain frequency that could serve as fuel for his space ship, which he kept under a cloak on the roof of the building where she'd been tied up. He was on the lam, as it turned out, for a list of crimes as long as her arm and which she was certain included kidnapping. His ship had been disabled so he couldn't flee the planet so he'd become desperate, trying to find an alternative to get his ship in the air. Using opera singers' voices seemed strange, but apparently it worked. He'd only been a few voices away from fully charging his ship and had been getting sloppy in covering his tracks.

Her abductor had been infuriated to discover that Rose was not an opera singer. Apparently her lurking around the dressing rooms and wearing a fancy gown gave him the impression that she was in the show. He couldn't just let her go once he'd taken her, he knew she would go to the authorities. He'd debated finding a slave trader to sell her to, but worried that her extra weight on board his ship would require more of this "fuel". He'd finally settled on just killing her but had wanted to fetch another singer from the theater before the show ended for the night. Otherwise, he might have to wait until the next day to be in the position to apprehend another singer. Rose was eternally grateful that he hadn't killed her right off and Mickey's expression told her he was shaken by the extremely close call as well.

He embraced her in a tight hug, murmuring in her ear, "Thank god, Rose. Thank god."

"Oi! What's this then!" a voice from the doorway called out. Rose released Mickey and turned to see the Doctor and Reinette standing there. Reinette looked mildly interested, her eyebrows raised and a sparkle in her eyes. The Doctor looked nearly thunderous, his expression dark and threatening, his eyebrows drawn together.

"A hug. What's it look like?" Rose replied, unable to keep the edge out of her voice. The Doctor looked at her incredulously. Then, he turned his dark look on Mickey.

"I told you to meet us at the hospital," he reminded him.

Mickey strode over to him and got right in the Time Lord's face. "Rose wanted to come here. So we came here. She was a little knackered, having solved the whole mystery on her own and nearly being murdered," he said, grinding out the words.

The Doctor's gaze instantly changed, sweeping over to Rose. "What? What are you on about? I'd just about gotten the whole story out of the poor bloke at the hospital. Had to use a little psychic activity and some writing on steno pads but I got a good picture. But by the time I got to the authorities, they had the alien in custody."

Rose sighed heavily and told the Doctor and Reinette her story as she'd told Mickey just moments before. Reinette looked horrified, her hand flying up to her mouth. Mickey was watching the Doctor closely with a hardened expression. The Doctor's mouth hung open and he was staring at her. There was something else in his expression that she couldn't identify and she found she was feeling far too exhausted to even try. When she finished the story, the Doctor simply gaped at her.

"You... that whole time, you were in danger? You were freeing yourself and you'd found out the whole story?" he breathed, as if unable to believe it himself. She saw guilt settle into his features and where she once would have tried to soothe that guilt away, she found that now she had no energy for it. She had nearly died, he hadn't been bothered to look for her and maybe, just maybe, he deserved to feel a little guilty.

"Oh, Rose, how awful!" Reinette exclaimed, her expression all sympathy.

"Look at her wrist, boss," Mickey demanded. "That's what happened while you were fanning off to that hospital with Reinette. That's what happened when you were telling me that Rose would be fine."

The guilt settled even heavier across his features. She wasn't relieved to see it, but she also wasn't feeling terribly sympathetic either. He took her wrist in his hands ever so gently, running his fingers lightly along the edges of her torn skin. "I'm so sorry, Rose," he murmured. She felt the truth of his words but they gave her very little comfort. He was always sorry, wasn't he?

"Come, lets go to the medbay and I'll get you all patched up. Good as new," he said, louder and more chipper.

He led her to the medbay. Reinette and Mickey stayed behind in the galley, where Rose heard Mickey promise to fix her a cuppa. Rose perched on the edge of the exam table, trying very hard to keep her features even and not to let her anger show. The Doctor busied himself with finding the dermal regenerator and various ointments as well as a damp flannel to clean the wound.

"This might hurt a bit," he warned her. "Sorry about that." He carefully wiped around the wound before wiping at the wound itself. She hissed in a breath at the sting and reminded herself that some wounds hurt worse than others.

"I'm used to it by now," she said, unable to help herself from allowing the bitterness into her voice.

He glanced up at her, his eyes worried. "Are you okay, Rose?" he asked, as he gently dried her skin and ran the dermal regenerator over her skin. She watched silently for a moment as her skin healed before her very eyes.

"No, I'm not okay, Doctor," she finally answered, her voice quiet. He set the regenerator down carefully and began to rub the ointment into her wrist. She knew from past experience that it was meant to diminish scars and ease the tenderness of the new skin.

"What's the matter? Will you tell me?" he asked and he set the ointment down. He took both of her hands in his and rubbed his thumbs over the backs of her hands.

He looked so earnest, as he always did, and she had to struggle not to give in to him. "You left me behind today," she told him, the tears already gathering in her eyes. "You left and I could have died."

Regret swam in his eyes and he looked every bit the tortured god in that moment. "I made a mistake, Rose. I thought... I don't know what I thought. I'm so sorry, you have to believe me."

"I do believe you, I'm just not sure that your apology is good enough for me right now," she said, her voice barely a whisper. He looked stunned and crushed at her words. She started to feel bad but reminded herself that it was his own doing. He could have prevented this. He could have never invited Reinette on board in the first place, in fact.

She pushed that thought away as soon as it crossed her mind and she was left with a sinking realization. She couldn't! But... what other choice did she have? Her heart was no longer sinking, it was missing altogether.

"Rose," the Doctor began and he looked like was gathering steam to give her a full out apology. She knew, right in that moment, that she could not deal with it right now. She had to get to her room, the sooner the better.

She pushed off the table and he stood up, looking startled at her sudden movement. "I need to..." she trailed off, gesturing behind her. Leaving him looking very confused behind her, she dashed from the room and headed to her own room where she could consider her devastating realization in private, away from his probing, gentle eyes.

 **Chapter 3**

Chapter Summary

Rose has reached a decision about her future on the TARDIS and some emotional conversations follow.

Again, as always, HUGE hugs to foxmoonfade for her fantastic beta services. This fic would NOT be what it is without her.

Rose was no sooner in her bedroom before there was a soft knocking at her door. She didn't think it was the Doctor... he would have just barged right in, as usual. Mickey would have knocked a lot firmer. That only left...

She opened the door to see Reinette standing in the corridor, looking uncomfortable for the first time since Rose had known her. "Pardon me, but may I enter? I feel that you and I should talk," she asked. Rose stepped aside and gestured vaguely towards her room for the woman to enter, trying to cover her surprise at Reinette's visit with a small smile of greeting. There wasn't much in the way of seating in her room but at least the floor was tidy.

Rose indicated the solitary chair that sat in the corner near her bed and Reinette settled herself down in it primly, adjusting her skirts as she did so. Rose sat on the edge of the bed and wished she'd had time to change out of her gown. It was no longer as comfortable as it'd had been before. She felt painfully out of place wearing it. She'd had hopes that the Doctor would maybe appreciate seeing her in the pretty dress but next to Reinette she had all but disappeared. She thought briefly, painfully, of the Doctor when she first knew him and how impressed he had been to see her dressed up. Swallowing the lump that had risen in her throat, she pushed those thoughts aside.

"What did you need to talk about?" Rose asked, feeling somewhat confused and nervous. She couldn't imagine Reinette ever wanting to come to her for a chat but the notion intrigued her.

"I'm concerned for you, Rose," Reinette told her. "You had a difficult day and you seemed rather... upset... in the galley."

"Oh, traveling with the Doctor, it's loads of fun. Thrilling and dangerous, sure... but with him, you just have to have a big laugh when it's all sorted." Rose felt sheepish, like she'd confsessed too much. She looked away. "It was a hard day," Rose finally agreed. "But those are fairly standard around here. You'll find that out. Hopefully, not the same way I did, but you never know."

"I will admit, I do feel a little apprehensive after learning what happened to you," Reinette said and her brow was creased.

"But you had fun today too, right?" Rose asked. "Before things went downhill, it was fun, yeah?"

Reinette smiled and nodded. "It was quite enjoyable. It's thrilling, as you say." She trailed off and looked thoughtful. "But you seemed downcast, even before this evening's events. Will you tell me why?"

Rose felt very uncomfortable. She picked at the material of her dress nervously. "It's been a hard couple of days for me, I guess. Between everything that happened and saving you and then this now..."

"You are perhaps worried about the Doctor and your relationship with him?" Reinette asked gently.

Rose's head snapped up and she looked at the other woman, startled. "I-I... I don't know what you're talking about."

Reinette smiled a little and leaned forward to pat Rose's hand as it rested in her skirts. "It's part of my business to be able to read people. I know my being here makes you feel uncomfortable."

She worked her mouth but no words came out at first. "Reinette... It's not you, you're lovely, it's just..."

The other woman held up a hand to silence her. "Don't worry, Rose. I understand, probably better than you know."

Rose finally found her voice and her strength. "There's nothing to really understand, Reinette. I've just had a hard time figuring out what's going on with me and the Doctor. I think I finally get it now and I know what I need to do. I don't hold this against you, trust me, I don't."

Reinette looked slightly confused. "What ever are you talking about, Rose?"

"I think it's time that I leave the Doctor," she answered, standing up and squaring her jaw.

The Doctor paced around the library trying to find something to dispel this nervous energy, but nothing was working. The days events were running through his head as he tried to pinpoint exactly when it was that he lost his handle on everything. Rose was upset and he found that if she was upset, then he was upset. Her displeasure burned like a dying star in his chest, and he felt completely at a loss as to how to put it right again. All he knew was that he needed to put it right, he couldn't bear to see her troubled like this. Knowing that it was his doing and his fault just made it that much worse.

Did she have feelings for him? He'd convinced himself that Rose only viewed him as her best friend but her recent behavior did have him wondering. And then, there'd been that time they had gone to Ophalamus IV not long after their own adventure on New Earth.

It'd been a perfect day on a perfect planet. There'd only been that minor dustup with the emperor that meant they had to run for their lives at the end of the day, but other than that... Rose had been acting a little down in the aftermath of the incident with Cassandra. He knew she'd been embarrassed at the way Cassandra had thrown herself at the Doctor, using Rose's body and he'd been careful not to tease her too much about it. Not that he'd felt like teasing her... not with the memory of her lips on his his, her fingers in his hair and her body pressed to his arousing him like nothing had in so many centuries.

He'd thought about that kiss a lot, despite his better interests. He'd purposefully not touched her, trying to keep himself passive in the contact, thinking that would lessen any awkward after effects. All the passivity in the world couldn't erase the taste of her mouth.

But that one perfect day, on that one perfect planet, something had happened between them. They'd stopped for lunch at a small outdoor cafe near the marketplace. The Doctor had talked her into ordering some of the local delicacy which he told her tasted just like a mix between chips and bananas. She'd been skeptical, especially considering the vague purplish color but had ultimately given in to his coaxing. She'd ended up being enthralled with the ks'arva, as they were called, and declared them downright delicious. They'd even fought over who got the last one on the plate.

The Doctor had split the remaining ks'arva in two and had gestured for her open her mouth so he could pop it in. She'd obliged and his gaze had been riveted to her mouth as she accepted the morsel and chewed it. Their gazes had met and the look that passed between them had been unlike any they had shared before. He'd shaken himself, an apology already forming on his lips when she quite suddenly had leaned forward and brushed her lips against his.

It had been the most simple and innocent of kisses, but the Doctor felt a surge of heat spread through him at the mere memory of it. Her lips had pressed to his only briefly, but that moment had lasted an eternity in his mind. And when she'd pulled back a second later, her eyes had been warm on his.

Of course, he'd panicked at the intimacy and had been up out of his seat, grabbing her hand and dragging her towards the marketplace. He'd babbled a mile a minute about how fantastic the marketplace was on this planet and how pleased she'd be with the selection of clothes, knick knacks, and baubles that she'd find here. Distraction, distraction was key. It had worked, she'd found a stall selling figurines and had expressed such delight over one of them that he hadn't been able to resist purchasing it for her, which was an act rare enough in and of itself. He wasn't a big one on gifts but Rose was special and that day was special. She'd been so touched, she'd hugged him long and tight.

She'd kissed him... that had to mean something though right? Surely, friends kissed one another on occasion but he couldn't help but hope, just a little, that it had meant more than that to her. And now, with everything that had happened... he puzzled over her motivations even more.

There was a soft rapping on the doorframe of the library. He looked up and saw Rose standing there. She had changed out of her beautiful dress and he wondered for a moment if he had told her just how beautiful she looked in it. He worried that maybe he hadn't. She was wearing pyjama pants and a simple cotton t-shirt and he'd be darned if she didn't look even more beautiful with her hair down and her makeup washed off. However, she didn't look happy and her expression could only be described as guarded, her eyes dull and her smile hidden from him. "Rose?" he asked.

"Doctor," she said as a way of greeting. She stepped into the library, looking around her as if she was seeing the place for the first time.

"Rose, about today... I'm so sorry. I was completely rubbish and I know..." he began.

"You know, Doctor," she cut him off, her tone even and firm. "I was ready to follow you to the ends of the Universe. I did follow you to the ends of the Earth. And it was amazing. I meant what I said before, I wouldn't have missed it. But I'm worried now that my... desire to stay with you is clouding my judgment."

He did not like how that sounded. "Does this have to do with what happened today?" he asked softly. He fought the urge to walk up to her, to grab her arms and fold her into a warm hug, but he remained still. The last thing he wanted was for her to get spooked and dart off again.

"It has everything to do with what happened today," she said and her voice now hard and angry. She paused and took a deep breath, "Everything and nothing all at once. Today just showed me what I should have seen two days ago. And, if we're being honest, what I should have seen coming all along if I hadn't been so blind."

No, definitely not good. "Rose, please talk to me. I know I made some big mistakes today. I feel like a prize idiot. I should never have gone to the hospital when I should have been looking for you. I wasn't thinking" he said, his voice dropping to a whisper.

"You told me, earlier this week, that you've traveled with other companions. I've now learned first hand that they will eventually get left behind," she explained, her eyes darting all around the room but refusing to land on him. "I hoped that maybe things would be different for me, that I was special to you, but I think I was just fooling myself. Because I think you're already replacing me." She was making fists with her hands, clenching and unclenching. He didn't think he imagined the waver in her voice.

He blinked at that. Now he was getting scared. "What in the blazes do you mean? Replacing you with whom?" he asked her. He was losing hold of the emotions he always tried so hard to control and was having difficulty keeping the anger out of his voice.

"Reinette. And it's okay, I understand. It's my problem to deal with. I just learned today that I cannot do this. I thought maybe I could, but I can't," she said and her voice trembled causing the ache in his chest to flare. He struggled between a desire to comfort her and his natural tendency to keep his emotions guarded.

"You think I'm replacing you with Reinette?" he asked, amazed that she would even think so.

"I know you are. I've seen it, ever since we met her. You're taken with her. It bothered me, it still does, but like I said, that's my problem and not yours. I figure, the best thing for me to do right now is have you take me home," she explained and she met his eyes. Her jaw was set firmly and it was something he'd seen often on her mother when she'd set her mind about something.

His blood had been on fire but now it was promptly extinguished as a wave of ice rushed through him. It stole all the warmth in his body and settled in his blood like lead. "Rose," he gasped. "You can't mean that!"

She nodded and he could see tears shining in her eyes. "I do mean it, Doctor. I know now it's for the best. This way you get your time with Reinette without me sulking around, being a third wheel. And I'm able to get away with as much dignity as I can manage, maybe try to make something of myself, maybe become someone you can be proud of," she said, trying in vain now to keep her chin from trembling.

He stepped forward then, and reached out to touch her cheek with his fingers. The thought of her leaving, of never traveling with her again, of finding new planets without her by his side was causing him even more pain than he would have expected it would. She flinched and he withdrew his hand as if he'd burned her. "Rose, I am proud of you. I'm so proud of you!" he insisted. It felt like something in him was cracking, breaking apart. He felt frantic, trying to shore up his emotions and fix everything all at the same time.

Rose was biting her lip and she looked seconds away from shattering before his eyes. She clenched her fists again, taking a deep breath and shook her head against his words. "It doesn't matter. It's better I leave now, before you hate me or worse, before you are sick of me. I'll just get in the way."

"No, you won't! Reinette, she's not-" He broke off, not sure how he was planning to end that sentence. She's not what? She's not you. That was the truth of it. Reinette was a breath of fresh air in the spring; Rose was the springtime itself. Still, Reinette was safe where Rose was so, so dangerous. There was no danger of losing himself to Reinette and she wouldn't likely lose herself to him either. He still wasn't sure how Rose felt about him, though the way she was acting now made him wonder if perhaps her feelings for him weren't as platonic as he'd previously thought. If Rose had feelings for him then what would there be to stop him from losing everything to her?

"I think have a bit of an idea of what she is, Doctor," Rose told him and her voice hardened again. "I'd appreciate if you didn't lie to me about it."

"Lie to you? I haven't lied to you. Is this about the snog?" he asked. He could tell the moment that the words left his lips that it hadn't been about the snog but it sure was now. Her face fell, the color draining from her cheeks.

"Excuse me?" she demanded, her voice rising on the last word. "Snog? You snogged her? When?"

Oh dear. Not good at all. "Well," he began, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, "to be completely accurate, she snogged me. And it was back in 18th century France."

He'd hoped he would get some credit for honesty and that maybe she would understand that it was just a meaningless kiss, but the look on Rose's face told him he was getting no credit at all. She didn't understand at all. She looked incredulous, angry and... was that hurt? There were tears welling up in her large, brown eyes. Oh yes, that was definitely hurt. He swallowed. He felt like the worst sort of prat.

"That just proves my point," she finally said, her eyes flicking with something that resembled sadness. "And without me here, you'll be free to snog her all you like."

"Rose, you are being ridiculous," he told her, exasperated. Bugger all, he didn't want to snog Reinette, especially now that he could see what having Reinette on board the TARDIS was doing to Rose. He wondered, just a little bit, if perhaps all of this meant that Rose was feeling a little jealous. Which, as far as he was concerned, was utterly absurd as she had absolutely nothing to be jealous about. Reinette was beautiful and attractive and charming. Snogging her had been a thrill for him, to be sure. But Rose was... she was Rose. She was irreplaceable to him and he couldn't believe that she would think she was. Plus, if she was jealous then that might mean that she saw him as more than a friend. As much as the mere notion of that set off his internal warning bells, it also thrilled him.

However, telling her she was being ridiculous was apparently the wrong thing to say. She blinked at him as if trying to believe that he'd just said what he had. "I'll tell you what is ridiculous. Ridiculous is finding out in the span of a handful of days that not only are you just one of a long line of traveling companions, not even remotely special, but that the man who just promised you that he wouldn't leave you behind like the all the others does in fact actually leave you behind. Through sheer luck, he's able to come back, but he brings with him your replacement. You're trying to adjust to this, telling yourself it's no big deal but then the very next day after that, you get abducted and the man who you thought you might have actually meant something to doesn't even care enough to go looking for you. That, dear Doctor, is ridiculous!"

Guilt gnawed at him as he listened to her tirade. He also feel annoyed, mostly because he knew she was right. She was right to be so frustrated with him and with everything that had happened but he had no idea how he could fix any of it. That helplessness, it made him feel so... aggravated. Quite suddenly, he very much felt like lashing out.

"Rose Tyler, you are acting completely out of line. You are acting jealous and... petty!" he spluttered, anxious to give his frustration an outlet.

Still, he regretted the words as he heard them linger in the air between them. He regretted them even more when he felt the stinging slap of Rose's open palm connecting with his cheek. She hit him with no small amount of force; his head snapped back.

He lifted a hand to touch his sore cheek. He turned his eyes to Rose and found her glaring at him. Tears swam in her eyes, one escaping to trail down her cheek. Despite the tears, her eyes flashed angrily, her cheeks flushed blotchily and it drew him up short; he'd never seen Rose give that look to anyone. He certainly had never expected to see it trained on him.

"Take. Me. Home," she growled at him, before turning on her heel and stalking from the library.

Rose walked down the corridors, her mind racing with what had just happened. They'd argued and he'd said she was jealous and she hit him... she couldn't quite believe it. She needed an outlet. She needed to find her friend.

She found Mickey in his bedroom, hanging his tuxedo up on a hook. He was dressed for bed already, pants and a vest. His room was neat, not surprising considering he'd only just moved in a few days before. There was a laptop on a small desk in the corner, a short book case, a single bed and a wardrobe. Mickey looked up when she entered the room, and she closed the door behind her. She must have looked a right mess. Without even saying a word, Mickey crossed the room and pulled her into his arms.

"All right, Rose?" he said.

"I'm leaving, Micks. I have to," she mumbled against his chest. The emotions finally got the best of her and she let the tears spill down her cheeks, wetting his vest. She felt his arms tighten around her and he just held her for a few minutes until she felt composed enough to pull back.

"What do you mean, you're leaving? What happened, Rose?" he asked. His voice was filled with concern.

She wiped at her eyes and sat on the edge of the bed. "I just told him. I even slapped him. Hadn't meant to do that, of course, but he... he called me jealous and petty."

Mickey sat on the duvet next to her and put a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Sounds like he deserved the slap, then."

She smiled ruefully. "Thing is, he was kind of right. I am jealous," she admitted. "I love him, Mickey. I know I shouldn't, I know it's stupid, but I do."

He wiped at the tears that leaked down her cheeks and smiled at her. "Yeah, it's pretty stupid," he agreed. "But can't always help who we love, yeah?" She had a feeling that he was talking about more than just her and the Doctor. She felt a pang of guilt.

"No, I guess we can't," she murmured. "I'm so sorry, Mickey."

"Oh, don't worry about it, babe," he assured her. "Ancient history. Besides, you love the Doctor."

"Of all the rotten luck, yeah?" she quipped, but not feeling remotely like laughing.

"He's the worst sort of fool, Rose," Mickey told her in a low voice. "He'll figure that out, eventually."

"He'll have to figure it out without me here," she said quietly. "I'm going home, Mick. For good."

"You're sure?" he asked, incredulous. "Didn't you once risk your life, tearing open the TARDIS to get back to him?"

"My life, yeah. But I won't give up my dignity," she replied, sighing heavily. "It's time I accept that while I love him, he just doesn't feel the same."

Mickey was watching her and he seemed to want to say something but was thinking better of it. Finally, he spoke. "I'd like to stay. If that's okay with you."

Rose looked at him, startled. "Of course that's okay with me. You should stay. Don't need my permission. I want you to be able to see the stars, Mickey. There's nothing else like it. Is that why you're staying?"

He smiled a little. "I didn't want you to think that I was... betraying you or anything," he said sheepishly. "Yeah, I want to see what else is out there. I've had a little taste and I want to see more. I figure, after the last two trips he pretty much owes me. You'll be okay, won't you? Without me there?"

She nodded. "I'll have mum, I'm sure. And I have some ideas. I'd like to get a proper job, maybe see about finishing my a-levels if I can," she explained, her voice shaking a little. Putting all of this into words made it feel so real and so final. She'd never thought she'd leave the Doctor. Ever.

"I like the sound of that," he told her, nudging her shoulder with his. "You show him. You show everyone."

She sighed, feeling safe in the comfort of Mickey's friendship. She would certainly miss him, but she was happy that he was getting his chance too. "I never really thanked you properly," she said, suddenly remembering everything that had happened earlier that day. "You saved me today."

He shrugged. "You were saving yourself, if I remember. A few minutes later and you would have been out the door on your own," he pointed out.

"But you came for me. The Doctor said my being missing was nothing to worry about and took off, but you didn't listen. You went looking for me," she said earnestly. "Thank you. It really means alot to me, especially right now."

"I'd do it anytime, babe," he told her, his eyes shining.

"I'm going to miss you, Micks," she sighed, leaning against his side. He wrapped his arm around her, pulling her close and resting his head atop hers.

"I'll miss you too," he said quietly. "But I'll be back before you know it."

 **Chapter 4**

Chapter Summary

Rose's time on the TARDIS has come to an end. How do she and the Doctor deal with the separation?

Thanks again to foxmoon for being the BEST BETA EVER.

The Doctor didn't sleep a wink that night. Of course, he didn't often sleep as he didn't need it with his superior Time Lord physiology. But he usually tried to get in maybe an hour's worth each night. That night, he knew better than to try. Sleep would elude him. He had a lot on his mind and the majority of that was Rose.

He didn't want to take her home. It went against everything he wanted, everything he hoped for. That was a revelation all of its own. He hoped for something with Rose. He had no reason to hope, and no foundation for relationships like the one he wanted with Rose in anything he'd been taught when growing up on Gallifrey. But hope didn't always listen to reason. In fact, he thought he could make a strong case for hope never listening to reason. Maybe that's what made it hope.

He'd done a great job lately of mucking everything up. He'd thought he was doing the responsible thing by putting some distance between himself and Rose. Instead, everything he'd done had only hurt her more. He'd seen that hurt in her eyes last night in the library. He didn't understand it one bit either. Not a bit of it made any sense.

He still couldn't understand why bringing Reinette along would make her so upset that she'd want to leave. He'd accused her of being jealous because he'd felt a flare of panic at the idea of her leaving, but he just couldn't believe that was the only reason. Rose should be happy to have another woman on board to talk to. After all, wasn't she always complaining to him that he was too much like a bloke when she tried to explain things like what she called "chick flicks" to him? Shouldn't she be happy to have more people around to share their experiences with?

He was upset and he hated to feel upset. Anger bubbled again under his skin just like it had the night before when he'd been arguing with Rose in the library, when he'd accused her of being jealous and petty and she had slapped him. His cheek still stung from that. She had never slapped him before. Her mother, sure, but that was... her mother. He was pretty sure that stories were passed around the estate about the Wrath of Jackie Tyler. Rose, however, had always been more gentle with him. More likely to soothe away his fears and doubts rather than get angry and haul off and slap him.

It made him feel even more prickly and annoyed.

Then again... kissing and slapping. Thinking again of Jackie and her fondness for "Eastenders", he remembered that those two things were fairly indicative of romantic interest for humans. The kissing he understood, the slapping less. But both from the same person, combined with Rose's curious behavior regarding Reinette... that might mean she had feelings for him. He both wanted that and wanted to run from it. He literally didn't know what to do about it. He needed more time to figure this out but he had no more time.

He was devastated that she wanted to leave. He thought she had wanted to stay with him, that he meant enough to her for her to want to be here with him as long as possible. He suspected now that she had feelings for him, that she cared about him. Or she had cared. Until he had done everything he'd done these last few days to make her stop caring. Because if she did care for him, if she cared at all, she wouldn't be leaving him now.

The anger and disappointment and heart-sickness simmered and settled in his gut. A hard expression fixed on his face as he sat in the jump seat in the empty console room, staring into space.

Rose cinched up her duffle bag. She had tried to pack up everything in her bedroom but there simply wasn't room. She'd collected a lot of trinkets over the years and they all meant so much to her. Mickey promised that he'd pack up what he could for her and bring it back when he had the Doctor bring him back. That made her feel a little better and she then focused on packing the things that meant the most to her. This meant that her pack was mostly full of trinkets and souvenirs and she left a good deal of her clothes behind.

There was one souvenir that she hesitated over, however. It was a little statuette she'd picked up when they visited Ophalamus IV, after the whole debacle with Cassandra on New Earth. She'd been feeling very self-conscious around the Doctor after that, because of the kiss and because of how much she had secretly enjoyed it. He hadn't teased her, which she had appreciated, and he'd noticed she was feeling down. A relaxing trip to a beautiful planet had been exactly what she needed.

She'd kissed him that day, on an impulse. And it was all her, no Cassandra in sight. It was just a brief touching of lips but she convinced herself that for a small moment, the Doctor had responded in kind to her, just a little. He hadn't pushed her away. It had fueled her fantasies for weeks afterward. She'd wondered if maybe the Doctor might have feelings for her as well... hopes that had been dashed this last week.

He'd dragged her through the marketplace after all, all manic energy and that was when they'd found this little figurine. Rose had been taken with it right away, saying it looked just like one of Earth's kangaroos. He'd bought it for her himself and had handed the figurine to her with such a proud look on his face that she'd been unable to keep from grabbing him in an impromptu hug.

It had been such a perfect day, even with the eventual running for their lives (maybe especially with the running for their lives), that standing here now in her half empty room and holding that figurine filled her with such sadness that she wondered how many times a heart could break before it would finally get the hint and stop putting itself back together again. All that promise she had felt that day had been dashed into pieces this last week. She couldn't bear to take the figurine with her, knowing it would only remind her of her own foolish hopes and dreams. With trembling fingers, she replaced it back on top of her dressing table.

She tossed a few more items into her pack and then turned around to survey the room. The urge to throw the bag down, to tell the Doctor that she'd changed her mind after all, was so strong that her knuckles whitened as she gripped the bag. It was for the best, she reminded herself.

Hefting the pack onto her shoulder, she turned and walked out of her TARDIS bedroom for the last time.

The Doctor was no longer alone in the console room. Reinette had joined him first, dressed for the day casually in a pair of slacks and a blouse and looking as cool and crisp as ever. He wondered idly if she ever would consider dressing more casually, in jeans and a hoodie or something along those lines. He quickly dismissed the notion as it seemed inherently wrong.

He greeted her and she perched on the jump seat. "Where are we off to today?" she asked him and he cringed involuntarily.

"Earth, 2006, London. The Powell Estate," he told her, busying himself with controls on the console so she wouldn't see his eyes.

"Isn't that where Rose and Mickey are from? Is it a visit? Or is Mickey going home?" Reinette wanted to know. The Doctor knew she wasn't trying to upset him, but every question felt like a punch in the gut.

"Nope, Mickey is staying," said Mickey as he strode into the console room. He was wearing his standard jeans and t-shirt. "Rose is going home."

"She is? Whatever for?" Reinette said, her forehead wrinkling. The Doctor glanced up and she looked at him questioningly. He glanced at Mickey who was fixing him with such a hard glare that he quickly looked away again.

"She has a good reason," Mickey replied with an accusing tone.

"Are you going home as well?" Reinette asked.

"Nope. I'm going to stick around, see what himself there can show us," he answered.

So just Rose was leaving. At that moment, the Doctor would have easily dropped off Mickey and Reinette so that Rose would stay with him. He took a deep breath, calming himself. At least he would not be alone, he reasoned. Being alone would be the worst possible thing after losing Rose. Of course, he tried not to concentrate on the niggling suspicion that Rose would not be leaving if it weren't for the others on board right now. That small suspicion caused the anger and hurt to flare in him once more.

Mickey and Reinette continued chatting amiably but the Doctor turned them out. He could tell he would not be fit company today. The rest of the day would likely be spent in the Vortex, so that he could tinker with the TARDIS or lurk around the library. Or just to sit in his room feeling sorry for himself...

He knew the moment she stepped into the console room because the entire chemistry, the entire feel of the room shifted noticeably. At least, it was noticeable to him. He didn't look up. He couldn't look up. If he looked up and he met her eyes he would do something that he knew he shouldn't do. He'd stride across the console room, grab her up in his arms and never, ever let her go.

"There she is!" Mickey said when he finally spotted Rose. The Doctor smirked inwardly. He'd noticed her a full 4.8 seconds sooner. Yet Mickey was getting all the credit where Rose was concerned these days.

"Rose! I hear you're leaving!" Reinette exclaimed. "Whatever for?"

The Doctor looked up then. He quite simply couldn't help himself. He saw Rose set her full pack down next to one of the coral struts and shrug her shoulders. She looked resigned. "It's time, I think," she answered, her voice wobbling ever so slightly. "Don't want to... overstay my welcome."

Hurt blossomed in his chest at her words. How could she even think that? "We ready to go then?" he asked curtly, feeling very ready to get this whole scene over with so he could go grieve in peace.

Everyone turned to look at him. Everyone except Rose. She was very studiously looking at everything but him. "Ready," she replied.

The tension in the console room was so thick that he was sure that Reinette and Mickey felt stifled by it by now. Anxious to get the deed done, he input the coordinates and flipped the lever. The room stayed uncomfortably silent as the TARDIS lurched into motion and then landed with the usual thunk.

He tried not to watch too close as he saw Mickey draw Rose into a tight hug. He was murmuring something in her ear and the Doctor felt a searing streak of possessive anger slice through him. They were just saying goodbye to one another, he reminded himself. They were good mates, that's all. They hadn't rekindled their relationship on board the TARDIS, he was confident of that. There had been none of the obvious signs and signals of an intimate relationship between them since she'd started traveling with him. Still, she obviously felt close to Mickey and he found himself feeling very jealous of that closeness. He'd felt that close to her just days ago.

Rose gave Reinette a short hug and he heard Rose murmur, "Good luck."

She stooped and picked up her pack. He watched her take a long look around the console room, as if trying to memorize what she saw. Then she strode towards the doors, walking past him. At the last second, her eyes met his and her look was angry. Nearly as angry as he was now feeling. He set his jaw and watched as she continued past him, pushing through the doors and leaving the TARDIS.

She didn't even say goodbye to him. Not even a word. Just that... look. If he'd had hackles, they would have been raised. No, he could not just let her leave it like that, not after everything they had been through together.

He didn't even glance at his other companions before he strode down the ramp and out the doors after Rose, his long coat swirling behind him. She was already several feet away, heading determinedly towards the building that housed her mother's flat.

"Rose," he called sharply and she stopped but didn't turn around. "What are you playing at?"

She kept her back to him but he saw her shoulders slump a little. "I'm not doing this now, Doctor," she replied, her words muffled.

"And why not? What other time do we have?" he cried. "You've seen to that."

"I'd rather have the good memories," she said and her voice was quieter, he had to strain to hear her. "I don't want to leave on a bad note."

He felt his tenuous control straining to the point where he was beginning to wonder why he was bothering to hold onto it in the first place. He walked swiftly, reaching her in a couple long strides. He grabbed her arm and pulled her around so she was facing him. He saw tears tracking down her cheeks and the wind was very nearly taken out of him.

"I've got news for you, Rose Tyler," he growled, "you leaving at all is a 'bad note'."

"I've got to, I can't stay!" she insisted, dropping her pack. "I can't watch you and Reinette flirt with each other across the galaxy."

His eyebrows drew together. "Are you jealous, Rose? I really don't think you need to be. And I really don't want you to leave because of it."

"Why do you even care?" she cried. "You should be glad to be rid of me so that I won't bring everyone down with my petty jealousness." She spat the last two words.

"Why in the blazes would I be glad to be rid of you?" he shouted, losing the handle he had on his control. "Rose, you are making no sense at all!"

She snorted without much humor and wiped at her eyes. "That's me, not making any sense. Listen, I know I have no claim on you. You can do whatever and whomever you please."

"Is this about Reinette?" he asked, wondering if she would care if he did shag Reinette. Why would she even think he'd want to? Had Reinette said something to her?

"Really, Doctor, you are the most clueless creature in the universe sometimes," she said coldly and he was stunned by her detachment.

Frustration boiled inside of him. "And you are one of the most heartless," he returned and watched as the color drained from her face. He didn't mean it, he knew he didn't mean it. But the words spilled out of his mouth regardless. "You used to be so compassionate, it was one of the things I enjoyed the most about you. But what you're doing right now, this is cruel."

She was still staring at him, her mouth hanging open, her eyes wide and confused. "Cruel?" she gasped. "You think I'm being cruel? I'm doing this to protect myself!"

"Yes, cruel! Don't you understand what this is doing to me?" he asked her and he willed her to understand without him having to say the words. He couldn't bear to say the words, not now. The hole he'd gotten himself into had gotten deeper and he couldn't seem to stop digging.

"No, I don't. Because you never tell me anything! And you're too self-absorbed to see what it is doing to me!" she replied, her voice cracking.

"You say that but you won't even give me a straight answer about why you're leaving," he told her. He needed to hear her say the words that he already suspected to be true. "Please, tell me why!"

She squeezed her eyes shut and took in a long, shuddering breath. "Why won't you just let me go? I asked and you always said you'd take me home if I asked."

He swallowed. She had him there. He had promised there, so long ago, back when he had worn leather and had hidden behind a shield of false bravado. Back when he hadn't been in as deep as he was now. And now... he'd never expected her to want to leave. There was something that he was missing, he felt like he was working with half the information he needed. If he only had more time to talk to her, to prove to her that he was sorry... why couldn't she give him more time?

"Rose, please don't go," he finally said, his voice lowering.

"I have to," she whispered. "I can't stay with you and let you break my heart."

But you're breaking mine, he thought and he found that he was having to blink back the tears that were forming in his eyes. He mustered up his control as best he could. "Please promise me you'll call, if you change your mind. You still have the TARDIS number programmed into your mobile, right?" he asked her.

She looked up at him, her eyes swimming. He watched her, trying to take in all the details of her features that he could so that he could call up her image in his mind's eye later. He would never forget her.

"I won't be calling you," she promised, her voice soft. "Goodbye, Doctor."

She turned away and stooped to pick up her bag. She kept walking to the stairway, never once giving a look back at him before she vanished behind the door.

He shoved a hand through his hair, taking deep breaths, trying to get his emotions under control. That was it. She was gone. His Rose was gone.

He turned and walked back to the TARDIS, his footsteps feeling heavier than he could remember them feeling since she'd joined him nearly two years before. He pushed past the doors and walked up the ramp. Mickey and Reinette were still there, they'd been talking and had fallen silent when he walked in. He crossed to the console and flipped a few switches, sending them into the Vortex. Then he walked out of the room without ever having said a word.

Rose trudged up the steps to her mother's flat, each rise seemed to take more energy to climb than the one before. That was by and far the hardest thing she'd ever had to do. As she felt the shock of the situation soak through her, she couldn't believe she'd actually done it. He'd nearly begged her to stay there at the end. The look in his eyes made it seem like he might have felt something for her, something genuine and deep. She had to remind herself that it was just guilt. Guilt and friendship and responsibility. She couldn't stay with him just for that, not when there were others there to travel with him. She knew she could never leave him on his own, alone in that TARDIS, but he had Reinette and Mickey.

She got to the flat door and felt a moment's indecision. Did she just walk in or did she knock? She was paralyzed with her choices for a moment before the door flew open revealing her mum standing there with a shocked expression.

"Rose! I wasn't expecting you back here so soon!" she cried, pulling Rose into the flat and making a show of looking around behind her expectantly. "Where's the Doctor then? Did he decide to stay back with the TARDIS?"

She couldn't hold it back any longer. The floodgates opened and she was sobbing, dropping her pack and crumbling onto the sofa. The grief she'd been so carefully holding back washed over her, pulling her under, drowning her.

Rose heard her mother gasp and slam the door before running over to her side. "Sweetheart! What happened! What's the matter? Is the Doctor okay? Tell me!" she demanded, sounding panicked.

She was gasping, the sobs wracking her body and she couldn't speak. She felt her mother's arms come around and she held her like that for untold minutes until Rose was composed enough to speak.

"I left him, mum," she said, her breath hitching. "I had to."

Jackie pulled her up and then set back so she could study her face. Her brow furrowed. "What did he do? Did he hurt you?" she asked, her voice rising as she began jumping to conclusions.

"No, it's not what you're thinking. He... I..." she trailed off, unsure where to start.

Jackie held a perfectly manicured hand up to silence her. "Wait, first things first. I'm making us a cuppa. Tea always makes it better," she assured Rose, patting her knee as she got to her feet.

Superheated infusion of free radicals and tannins, Rose thought as she got to her feet and went to the dining table. She sat heavily in one of the chairs there, staring dully at the table cloth and trying not to remember Christmas dinner there just a few months ago. Was everything going to make her think of the Doctor now? Was she already that far gone? She knew, of course, that she was and she had been for some time now. She'd been a little foolish to think that this break would be easy at any stage in the game.

She felt like she was missing a part of herself.

Jackie returned a few moments later, balancing a couple mugs of tea and a pack of chocolate biscuits. She handed Rose her mug and then settled down in the chair next to her, ready to listen. Rose blew across the top of the tea for a moment, gathering herself.

She explained what she could, about how they met Reinette and the Doctor asking her on board. She left out the bit about the Doctor snogging the courtesan for now, she didn't think she could trust her voice not to crack. She did tell her mum that she thought the Doctor might fancy Reinette, which was difficult enough. She left out the part about him leaving her and Mickey behind to fetch Reinette as well. She knew that would set her mum off and she just didn't feel up to dealing with her second-hand wrath at the moment. When she'd finished, her mum covered her trembling hand with her own.

"That couldn't have been easy for you, could it, sweetheart?" she asked gently. "Because you love him and here he brought in this other bird that he might fancy."

She nodded miserably. "It sounds so stupid, even to me. But I couldn't help it. I tried, mum. I really did. I didn't want to let it get to me. I told myself that I could be fine with whatever I could get." She went on to fill her mum in on what had happened on New Earth. Again, she glossed over a bit of the details with the opera house and Rose being abducted. She'd have plenty of time to tell her the details later when she was feeling a little more sturdy.

"There, there, sweetheart. Typical bloke, sounds like. He likes to pretend he's so high and mighty but it comes down to it, he's just like any other man, isn't he?" her mum griped.

"Maybe," Rose replied, drawing in a shuddering sigh and sipping at her tea.

"Where is Mickey, then? He go back to his flat?" her mum asked.

"He stayed. With the Doctor and Reinette. I'm glad he did too, he deserves to get to see the stars," Rose murmured.

"So after this business at the opera house, you decided you needed to come home?" her mum prompted.

"Yeah. I didn't see any other way, really. He was breaking my heart. I could stay behind there and watch him push me further and further away. I figured it'd be better if I made the break myself, you know?" she explained.

"Sure, sweetheart, I understand that," her mum assured her. "What did the Doctor say? When you told him?"

"He wasn't happy. He... called me jealous and petty," she said, cringing.

Her mum's eyes flashed at that. "Jealous and petty! Oooh, that man! I hope you laid one on him," she growled.

"I did. I slapped before I even really thought about it, I just saw... red." She sighed and ran a hand over her eyes. "It didn't make me feel any better."

"Well it makes me feel better knowing you got a slap in," Jackie muttered.

"And then today... he didn't want me to go, I could tell that he didn't. He even asked me to stay. But he... he couldn't give me a good reason to, you know?" she asked and she hoped that her mum did.

"You mean, tell you how he feel about you?" her mum asked.

"Yes. But he couldn't do it and it just made me so angry that he couldn't do it, even then," she told her weakly. She could feel the wave of grief threatening to rise again and engulf her. Her mum must have seen the signs of it because she helped Rose to her feet and guided her to her old bedroom.

"Here, sweetheart, why don't you lie down and have a bit of a kip. You'll feel better," she promised.

"Thanks, mum," Rose mumbled, pulling the duvet around herself and turning to face the wall. As the tears began to pour down her cheeks once more, she heard the door to her room gently close as her mother let herself out.

Somewhere, deep inside the TARDIS, the Doctor stumbled into a room he hadn't spent a lot of time in recently. Not since after the Time War, at any rate. It was his bedroom.

It was a large room, far larger than any of the other bedrooms. It was filled with all manner of remembrances of Gallifrey. Which would explain why he hadn't come in here very often, particularly in his last regeneration when the whole Time War was still so new and fresh and horrible. It was still horrible, it was still hard to see the pictures of the home he grew up in, his family, but the pain wasn't quite so raw anymore. That was the blessing of regeneration.

Right now, he barely saw any of it. He simply wanted to be alone and surrounded by things that, at least at one point in his life, had brought him comfort. He crossed the large room to the spacious and ornate bed. It was a bed he hadn't slept in for years now. He'd always caught naps in the library or sometimes even in one of the other empty bedrooms. Now, the deep crimson duvet called to him.

He sank down onto the plush mattress and pulled himself across it. He laid there, fully clothed down to his trainers and just... hurt.

Rose was gone. It was a mantra that had been repeating in his mind ever since she had turned and walked away from him at the estate. She was gone and she wasn't going to be coming back. She'd been there, by his side, since shortly after the war. He'd been in such pain when he met her. He'd tried to hide the worst of it's effects from her, but he'd been harsh with her at times. And yet she'd stayed and she'd held his hand. She'd cared for him, he knew she had. She had kept his demons at bay.

He'd stopped by her room, briefly, on his way to his own room. But the emptiness of it had prickled at his skin and tightened around his heart. Then he'd seen the kangaroo figurine on her dressing table and that tightness had pulled at him even more until he'd had to hurry out of her room and towards his own. She'd left behind that memento of a perfect, beautiful day together. If she had feelings, clearly they were gone now. And it was all his fault.

Now she was gone and he was lost without her. He curled into himself on top of the duvet and let the sobs overtake him, shaking his shoulders and burning his chest. He stayed there, on that bed, in that room, for many hours. Grieving.

 **Chapter 5**

Chapter Summary

It has been eight months since Rose left the TARDIS. What's Rose up to these days? And what happens when Mickey and the Doctor return to London?

As always, many thanks to foxmoon for the beta!

Eight months later...

Rose Tyler stood from where she'd been kneeling, filing away the press releases she'd been given earlier by her boss, Mrs. Stanton. She'd kept the J's until last since that particular file drawer was closest to the floor and it meant she'd have to get down on her knees. She was still young, only a few months away from turning twenty-two. At least, she thought it was a few months. Such things could be difficult to figure out when you've been a time traveler. As she stood and stretched her stiff back, she wondered how many months had been unaccounted for and if those months actually mattered as far as calculating her age or not. It seemed to her that maybe more weight should be given to the experiences she'd had rather than the time spent.

And if that were the case, she'd probably be closer to thirty. Maybe even forty, depending on what day you asked her.

She walked back to her desk which was at the back of the floor, tucked behind some shelving. It wasn't much but she was very grateful for it. Grateful for regular hours doing clean office work for a respectable company. It'd taken her a while to find it, but eventually the job at Pembroke Publishing had fallen in her lap due to a friend of her mum's telling her about the opening and then putting in a good word for her. She'd leapt at the chance. Rose had been spending long days, pounding the pavement, looking for work and applying for positions that she found on the notice board at the library and she'd been starting to feel very discouraged, like she couldn't do anything besides work in a shop or travel the universe. She was only a file clerk for now, but there was room for advancement and her immediate boss, Mrs. Stanton, was very supportive of her studying for her a-levels.

When she wasn't at work, she was studying. And when she wasn't doing either, she was laying in bed, trying to will herself to sleep. She had nightmares more often than not. Her sleep was never peaceful anymore. She was plagued by even the mildest scenarios. All it took was a flash of blue eyes and leather, or wild brown hair and pinstripes and she was sitting bolt upright in bed, overcome with guilt, longing, grief.

The Doctor haunted her still and she imagined he'd haunt her for a long while to come. There were many times she found herself deeply regretting her decision to leave him. Thankfully, there were even more times where she knew it had been the right thing to do. Those were the good days. Unfortunately, today was not a good day. Today was one of the days when she missed the Doctor so much her chest ached constantly. Every time she closed her eyes she saw his eyes shining at her, she saw the way he'd asked her to stay, she remember the feel of his arms around her in one of his fantastic hugs. She missed him so damn much.

She sat at her desk and shuffled through the papers littered across the top of it, figuring out what else she had left to work on that day. She still had some things left to do, including making some photocopies and then more filing. She smiled a little, her work was never done. It made for decent job security, at least. But it was coming up on her lunch hour and she had plans to enjoy the sandwich she'd packed that morning in the park across the street.

As she organized her desk, her thoughts drifted again. She hoped Mickey was having the time of his life traveling on the TARDIS. He hadn't been back since that day she'd been dropped off. He'd called the flat a couple times but had always spoken to her mum. For some reason, those calls always seemed to come on bad days for her, and she hadn't wanted to break down over the phone with him. But she missed him all the same. She could certainly use his companionship right now.

Her mum was always after her to broaden her social life. Rose rarely hung out with her old friends these days. She found she didn't have much in common with them anymore, and they didn't have much in common with her. They all had an extra year on her besides, due to that one time the Doctor brought her back 12 months later instead of 12 hours later. A lot of them were married now, some of them with children even. She knew it wasn't uncommon to grow away from childhood friends, but it felt like that process had been sped up for her.

Rose was not interested in dating in the slightest, a situation she was perfectly fine with. There was a bloke that worked at the publishing house as a low-level editor. His name was Henry and he was lovely and very polite to her. She knew he was interested but she just could not encourage his affections. She wasn't available right now. Maybe someday she would feel ready to look at other men, but right now that was the last thing on her mind. It wouldn't be fair to lead any blokes on by even attempting a date. That's just not where her focus was right now.

Plus, she liked to use any extra time she had to study for her A-levels. She was determined to get them, to improve her chances of getting a more desirable position in the future. And she had to admit, she was enjoying broadening her horizons. She found her studies were a lost easier to grasp, indicating just how much she'd learned in the last couple of years traveling with the Doctor. So many concepts that once might have gone right over her head now made perfect sense. It felt great to learn and to grow through that learning.

So many times she'd gotten a test back with high marks on it and she'd wanted to show it to the Doctor, to see his proud grin as he swooped her into a celebratory hug. She'd known, of course, that she was going to miss him. She just had been unprepared for how sharp the pain of missing him would still be for her after all this time. Rose was pleased with her accomplishments, her learning and her job, but it all seemed so much more hollow without him by her side to share them with.

With that in mind, she grabbed the book on European history she'd been studying, her sandwich and a bottle of water, and headed out for her lunch break. It was a sunny, warm day, perhaps the weather would help improve her reflective mood.

Jackie Tyler waved goodbye to her last hair client, Sue from downstairs. Sue's question about Rose hung in the air as Jackie closed the door to the flat and made her way back to the kitchen to clean up. How's Rose? Last time I saw her, she seemed down. Jackie had answered her with a tight smile and a simple, "Oh, she's fine."

But the truth? She was worried about her daughter. At one time, she'd have been thrilled for Rose return home for eight months, happy to have more time to spend with her. But it soon became clear that her daughter was a different woman now and had been deeply affected by her experiences. Perhaps being at home with her was no longer the best place for Rose to be.

When Rose had told her the story of why she had left the Doctor, Jackie had felt her blood boil with rage at that alien wanker for hurting her daughter. At the same time, knowing what she knew of the Doctor, he was probably beating himself up worse over all this than she ever could. At least, she hoped he was. He'd always seemed to care deeply for Rose, more than Jackie was comfortable with, and she had a hard time believing that her daughter leaving wouldn't affect him.

Rose was quiet now, and withdrawn. The spark had gone out in her eyes. She worked hard, long hours and studied whenever she wasn't working. She no longer had time for just watching movies on the sofa with her, going down to the pub for a drink, a trip to the shops to look for new clothes... All of the things they used to love to do together, Rose had no interest in any longer. Her daughter was gone, replaced with this empty, sad woman who cried in her pillow at night when she thought she couldn't hear her.

Jackie was just putting away her hair coloring supplies when she heard it. She stilled her hands and listened hard. It sounded like... grinding. A very specific grinding-whir that could only be... Her eyes went wide and she dropped her tray. The TARDIS!

She dashed out of her kitchen where she handled most of her clients and across the living room. She ran to the door and threw it open, but the noise had stopped. She was running along the balcony when Mickey came bursting out of the stairwell door, knapsack slung over his shoulder.

"Mickey!" she shrieked, throwing herself at him. He grabbed her up in a big hug, her feet lifting off the ground.

"Great to see you, Jacks," he murmured in her ear before setting her down again. She kept her hands on his arms but leaned back to get a good look at him.

He was sporting some scruff on his face but his eyes were twinkling and he looked... he definitely looked older. Maybe not physically, but there was something in his eyes. She was startled when she realized that it was the same thing she'd noticed in Rose's eyes after she'd traveled with the Doctor for a while.

"Oh Mickey, you look fantastic," she said truthfully. "Traveling agrees with you!"

He grinned and she detected a natural self confidence in his face that she hadn't seen before. "Thanks! I had a blast, I really did. Despite, you know... everything."

His face darkened a bit and Jackie made a face. "Speaking of which, where is he then?" she asked, her voice frosting over.

"The miserable sod is down in the TARDIS. I expect now that he's dropped me off, he'll be taking off pretty soon," Mickey said.

"Oh no, he doesn't," she growled. She released her hold on Mickey and began to hurry to the stairs. Mickey followed after her. "I'm not letting him get away without giving him a piece of my mind!"

She burst out of the stairwell doors and spotted the TARDIS sitting across the blacktop in its usual parking spot. She marched towards it, determined. She half expected it to begin to disappear as she approached but it didn't. Alien git must be distracted, she mused. She stalked up to the weathered blue doors and began to bang on them with her fist.

"Oi! Open up, I know you're in there!" she yelled. She banged some more, harder this time and Mickey drew up next to her and winced.

Finally, the door flung open and there was the Doctor, looking deeply aggravated. "Rassilon, woman, you can shout. Stop beating on my TARDIS!"

"You!" she choked out a moment before her open palm connected with his face making a cracking noise that echoed across the empty courtyard. Mickey winced again off to the side but she saw he was hiding a grin.

"What!" the Doctor spluttered, holding a hand up to his cheek protectively. "What was that for?"

Jackie poked a finger into his scrawny chest. "You know exactly what that's for. My Rose has been in a right state the last eight months and that has everything to do with you, mister."

He looked chagrined then, which soothed her ruffled feathers a little bit. "Jackie, I-" he began but she cut him off with a finger in his face.

"I'm not letting you worm your way out of this one," she told him. "You're coming back up to the flat and you're going to stay there until you've had a chance to talk to Rose."

The Doctor looked at Mickey, his expression decidedly horrified. Mickey just shrugged his shoulders. "Better listen to the lady, boss," he advised.

"I'm not so sure this is such a great idea, Jackie," the Doctor said, rubbing a hand along the back of his neck. She wondered briefly if he was rubbing the skin back there bald since he was constantly doing it.

"You know what's a bad idea, Doctor?" she asked him. "A bad idea is bringing another woman whom you snogged on board the TARDIS right on the heels of my daughter finding out she's just the latest in a long line of women. That is a bad idea. You coming up to the flat right now and staying there? That's a fantastic idea."

"Okay, you've got me. Lead me the way," he said, sounding defeated.

Jackie had to give him credit, at least he seemed to know when he was beaten. She peered over his shoulder. "Is the French lady going to join us?" she asked.

"Her name is Reinette. And no, she's not," the Doctor replied gruffly, stalking on ahead of them. She looked at Mickey questioningly.

"Reinette left us months ago," he explained.

"Oh, I can't wait to hear that story," she said. Mickey smiled and caught her in another hug.

"So good to see you again. I missed it here," he said gruffly.

She squeezed him back. "We missed you too. Both of us. Are you back for good?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yeah, I think I had my fill." He smirked and gestured in the direction of the Doctor, who was bouncing impatiently from foot to foot next to the door to the stairway. "You better go tend to the Time Lord."

Jackie snorted. "A cuppa and some biscuits and I'll have him eating out of my hand," she predicted. "You should go see Rose. She would love to see you."

Mickey's brow furrowed. "She's not in the flat? Where is she?" he asked. He looked surprised and Jackie wondered at that.

"She's working now. Spends almost all her time working. Or studying. She's changed, Mickey. She's so sad," she told him. She recited the address of the publishing house and Mickey entered in the information in his mobile.

"Got it. I'll go see her right now, she might be on her lunch break and have a chance to talk," Mickey said. "Good luck with him. I'll be back soon."

Jackie waved Mickey off and then turned her attention towards the rather impatient alien that was now shooting her glaring looks. "Keep your knickers on!" she called, walking to join him. She cackled when she heard his answering angry splutter.

The Doctor trailed along unhappily behind Jackie as she led the way to her flat, opened the door and went inside. He'd been expecting this, really. It's probably why he hadn't departed right away when Mickey had left the TARDIS. Well, maybe he wasn't expecting the slap. Or the forced imprisonment. But he had been hoping to see Rose, even just briefly. Now it looked like he might just get his wish and his mouth went dry at the thought.

"Have yourself a sit at the table," Jackie instructed. "I'll fix us some tea. Do you still take yours with five sugars?"

"Yep," he said, but without much enthusiasm. He was looking around the flat and noticed it didn't look much different from how he remembered it. He didn't see many traces of Rose at all, actually. Jackie had said that she had been in a "right state" since he'd dropped her off. What was thatsupposed to mean? Whatever it was, it certainly appeared to equal a protective slap from Jackie.

Jackie appeared with the tea and set a cup down in front of him. Ahh, a good ol' cuppa superheated infusion of tannins and free radicals. He wasn't likely to ever admit it out loud but Jackie Tyler's tea was the best stuff in the universe. He'd never forget how her tea had helped heal him up after his regeneration. Plainly put, tea comforted him and he sometimes wondered if it wasn't the British affinity for tea that kept leading him back to the U.K. He took a sip and breathed in the scent of the tea and instantly felt much calmer than he had when he'd entered the flat. He caught Jackie looking at him then, a small smile quirked at the corner of her mouth and he quickly schooled his expression to hide his delight in her tea.

She sat across from him and started right in. "So where'd the French lady go? Back home?" she asked.

He sighed and set down his cup. "Yes. And her name is Reinette," he corrected. He knew he'd pointed that out before. For some reason, this reminded him of the Rickey/Mickey stuff when he'd been his previous self and he cringed inwardly. "She was never meant to be permanent. She's an historical figured. Needed to go back and finish up her timeline and all that tosh."

Jackie raised an eyebrow. "Did you tell Rose that?" she wanted to know.

He blinked. "No, I guess I didn't think to," he replied, trying not to sound as sheepish as he felt.

She threw her hands up in the air and made an exasperated noise. "No, of course not. Why would you," she grumbled. "So when did you drop her off?"

He thought back. "I suppose it was a couple weeks after we dropped of Rose," he answered and took another drink of tea. "Do you have any of those chocolate biscuits?"

"You've been traveling without her all this time? And you didn't come back here and tell Rose? What is the matter with you?" she cried, getting up and stomping into the kitchen. She appeared a moment later with the pack of biscuits and threw them at him carelessly.

Luckily, he was able to calculate the trajectory and angle of her throw, accompanied by a fairly accurate presumption of its force - she was rather cross - and caught the biscuits easily before they smacked him in the face. He shot her a smug look before he continued. "I don't see what difference it would've made for Rose to know that Reinette had gone."

"Are you me having me on? Are you taking the piss?" Jackie asked.

The Doctor wrinkled his nose at her choice of phrase. At least she got Reinette's name right. And now he wondered why it mattered so much.

She continued, "Of course it would have made the difference. Rose thought you were replacing her with Reinette!"

He made a frustrated noise in his throat. "Well, she was wrong. She should have known that I wouldn't do that to her," he grumbled, taking a big bite out of his chocolate biscuit.

"Oh, you two! You must be made for each other, you're about to drive me barmy, you are!" Jackie exclaimed. She set her cup down and pushed it away, annoyed.

"How has she been, Jackie?" he asked her earnestly. "What has she been doing? Is she okay?"

Jackie took a deep breath. "She's had a hard go of it, Doctor," she told him. "I'm not going to sugar coat that for you. When she walked in this flat that day... I'd never seen my daughter look so wrecked. She burst into tears first thing."

The Doctor swallowed thickly. He called up the memory of her walking away from him, not turning around and he'd wondered at how she could do it. He realized then that she'd not looked back because she'd feared her control would crumble. It made his hearts ache painfully.

"I got her to tell me what happened, the whole story. France, Reinette, the opera house, everything," she continued and she fixed him with a hard look. "I can't believe you didn't look for her when she went missing, Doctor. That isn't like you. And frankly, I don't blame Rose one bit for being so upset over it."

He nodded and cast his eyes down to the floral tablecloth. "I know, Jackie. Believe me, I know. I made many mistakes with Rose and that was one of my biggest. You have no clue how much I regret that," he admitted.

Jackie settled back in her chair, watching him. She took a drink of her tea and still said nothing. He finally lifted his eyes and met her gaze. "What?" he asked, feeling suddenly self-conscious under her scrutiny.

"You. You're totally over the moon for her, aren't you?" Jackie said, sounding slightly amused.

"I don't feel I need to discuss that with you of all people, Jackie. No offense," he said primly. "And what sort of expression is "over the moon" anyhow? I've been over the moon and believe me, nothing about going on that particular journey calls to mind the act of falling or being in love with someone."

She chuckled at him. "Well anyhow, Rose tried to keep a brave upper lip around me, didn't want me to worry about her I think. But I'd hear her crying at night in her room. You'd be proud of her though, she didn't just lay around the flat, moping. She went out and found a job. Works too much, if you ask me, but she seems to like the hours. And she's studying to take her A-levels too."

He was proud and he could feel tears prickling at the backs of his eyes. He knew Rose was brilliant. It was good to hear that she was applying herself the way he always knew she could. But he didn't like to hear that she had been so upset. It called to mind that first day in the TARDIS after she left, when he hadn't left his room. By the time he'd finally emerged, carefully emotionless, Reinette and Mickey had joked that they'd thought he'd gotten lost in the TARDIS someplace. A silly thing, really. He knew the TARDIS like the back of his hand and there was no way he would ever get lost inside of her. The idea was simply ludicrous, which he told his companions. They of course had laughed at him all the more.

And he had missed Rose. She might have laughed at him too, but then he could have seen her eyes twinkle and heard her laugh and it would have all been okay.

"Is she happier now?" he asked quietly. If she was happy, then maybe this was all worth it. Oh sure, he was miserable but after more than 900 years, he was rather used to it by now. One could even say that being miserable was his biggest hobby. But if Rose was happy now, then maybe her leaving him was for the best. All he wanted, really, was for her to be safe and happy. If that meant a life separate from him, well, he'd learn to deal with it. He could do that, for her.

"Not even remotely," Jackie answered without hesitation. "She'd argue, probably, tell you she was just fine. She tells me that all the time. 'I'm always alright, mum,' she'll say. But she's not. She's my daughter. I know when she's having me on and I know when she's feeling sad. She doesn't ever do anything besides work and study. She doesn't even watch telly with me, even though I always kind of thought she was humoring me before. She never goes out with friends and she won't even think of dating even though that nice bloke at her job, Henry, is obviously sweet on her."

The Doctor tried not to let the news that there was a man interested in Rose bother him. It didn't really work, of course. The idea of any man with Rose was utterly abhorrent to him. This was a feeling that was partially mitigated by the fact that Jackie was saying that Rose wasn't dating, not even him, this... Henry. It shouldn't have made him feel better, he should have wanted her to carry on with her life without him, but it did make him feel better. What didn't make him feel better was hearing that Rose was still unhappy.

"Why is she unhappy?" he asked, suspecting the answer but needing to hear it for himself.

Jackie smiled at him kindly and leaned across to pat his hand. "Because she misses you."

He rubbed a hand over his face, feeling a small measure of relief and no small amount of fear. "She shouldn't. Not after the way I acted," he grumbled from behind his hand.

"Not arguing with that," she said wryly. "Tell me, Doctor. If Reinette went back home so shortly after you left Rose here, why didn't you come back sooner?"

He shrugged and debated coming up with some clever and off putting reason for why he'd stayed away. But he suspected that he was considered part of the family now and like with Rose, Jackie would be able to tell when he was having her on. "I was a coward. I thought Rose was angry at me, that she hated me. I figured you hated me too," he admitted sheepishly. "I was afraid to come back here and see that hate and anger firsthand. It would have... hurt too much to see it."

"Oh Doctor," Jackie sighed and she got up from her chair. She came around the table and leaning down, wrapped her arms around him in a hug. He was so startled that he didn't move for a few moments. Then, he carefully put his arms around her as well, returning the hug. She squeezed him and pulled away. "You daft alien. Don't you know that you're in this family whether you like it or not? We could never hate you. Rose could never hate you."

He smiled at her gratefully and felt a little overwhelmed. He hadn't had a family in a long time. Even then, it hadn't been a family the way humans thought of it. Time Lords and Gallifreyans weren't large on affection and emotional connection. He'd loved his family, in a very Time Lord sort of fashion. To have some measure of that now, here on Earth, was a gift to him. He'd never have his proper family back again; he'd lost them forever. But this family that he'd found himself unwittingly inducted into was something else altogether. And it was brilliant.

"Thank you, Jackie," he told her. "I mean it. It... means a lot to me."

She smiled and stepped back. "Now... are you going to stay here until Rose is home? Or do I need to look for some rope to tie you to that chair?"

He raised an eyebrow, mostly charmed at the idea that she thought ropes could possibly contain him. At least for longer than it'd take him to work his way out of them. "Yes, I'll stay," he told her. "Stayed through your inquisition, didn't I?"

Jackie made a face, then rolled her eyes, waving him off. "Good. You two need to have a good long talk," she said. "Come on, let's catch up on some telly while we wait."

The Doctor groaned. Catching up on some telly was probably the last thing he wanted to do. But he knew that if he tried to leave and go tinker in the TARDIS that Jackie would think he was trying to escape. He sat on the chair next to the sofa and braced himself as the latest episode of "Eastenders" came on with the press of a button on the remote. He'd make the best of this for the brief time it (hopefully) took for Rose to return home from work.

Then... he'd have to talk to her. On the other hand, he thought as his nerves got the better of him, maybe telly was the lesser of two evils.

 **Chapter 6**

Chapter Summary

Rose is reunited with an old friend.

Sorry to put off the reunion, folks, but it's coming!

BIG thanks to foxmoon for her fantastic beta services!

Rose munched on her sandwich and leafed through her history text. The sun was shining, almost unheard of for late January, and it warmed her shoulders, doing wonders to sooth her. Perhaps if she didn't have any more backslides today she could end up turning what had begun as a Bad Day into a Good Day. The park was unsurprisingly uncrowded as it was still very brisk out despite the sunny skies and she had her bench next to the fountain all to herself for a change. She finished off her sandwich and brushed her fingers along the tops of her legs to clear them of lingering crumbs. Keeping her eye on her text, she reached down to her bag to fetch her bottle of water.

She glanced up for a moment and saw someone she definitely hadn't expected to see in the park that day. Since it was still technically a Bad Day for her, she should have been filled with doubt, as she'd thought she might never see him again. But there, striding towards her with a huge grin breaking across his features, was her best friend Mickey Smith.

"Rose!" he called, breaking into a jog.

Her water bottle forgotten, Rose sprung to her feet and ran to meet him. He caught her halfway and she found herself hugging him as she had many times in the past; her legs around his waist, him spinning them around, laughter filling the air around them. When he finally set her down, she gaped at him.

"Are you really here, Mickey?" she asked, still unbelieving.

"Yep, I'm here. Back for good now," he promised. He followed her to the bench and they sat down side by side.

Her heart thudded painfully and she wondered if it was skipping a few beats too. This meant that the Doctor had been here. He'd been here and she'd missed seeing him. She wasn't sure how she felt about that. She had a sneaking suspicion the emotion that was winning out currently was disappointment.

"How long have you been back?" she said, trying to sound as casual as she could.

He made a show of checking his watch. "About twenty minutes now. I came right here," he told her, nudging her shoulder with his. "You're a hard woman to track down! I went to the office first, your mom told me where you worked. They told me you usually like to take your lunches in the park."

"So you saw mum? I bet she was glad to see you, too," Rose replied, smiling. They both had missed Mickey fiercely.

"I was glad to see her too. I missed both of you!" he exclaimed. "I had a brilliant time, but it wasn't the same as if you'd been there with me."

Rose swallowed, trying to ignore the lump of pain that was now lodged in her throat. She wished she'd been there with him too. She'd missed traveling among the stars so badly. It would been impossible to have predicted how much she would end up missing the Doctor, she thought, but the traveling was something of a surprise. Over the last eight months, she'd realized how accustomed to that lifestyle she'd become; such that sitting still felt unnatural to her now.

"You didn't miss anything around here," she assured him. "Boring old London. Business as usual. Not even one hostile alien invasion."

Mickey laughed at that. "That's a shame," he said "Then we would have been back here sooner."

There was a pause and she felt something unspoken pass between them. She wanted to know about the Doctor but was unsure how to ask the questions. Keep the focus on Mickey. That would do it, and she'd sound a lot less pathetic that way. "So what was your favorite adventure?" she asked, keeping her tone light.

"Now that is a hard question to answer," he said, grinning. He tilted his head to the side, thinking. "I guess I'll have to go with the space station orbiting over Rolagh. That was a brilliant place, Rose. It was the 33rd century and they were all about entertainment and amusement parks and rides and absolutely amazing food. That's why we went there, of course. The Doctor told me that I simply had to experience the anti-gravity roller coaster, preferably after a stomach full of deep fried bananas." He groaned at the memory. "I should have known better than to listen to him on that one, but I'll admit that it was definitely memorable.

"And naturally, there was the day to save. It turns out that a dictator down on Rolagh had a personal vendetta against the space station and pretty much all things that are fun. He was trying to carry out a plot to sabotage the space station and kill all the visitors on board. Naturally, the Doctor found out about this just in time and with my help, we put a stop to it." He puffed out his chest proudly.

Rose chuckled. "That sounds amazing, Micks. What did Reinette think of all that?" She had a hard time envisioning the courtesan riding a zero gravity roller coaster, much less indulging in a deep fried banana.

"She wasn't there," Mickey answered and Rose looked up at him sharply. "She went home, Rose."

"What? But why? Did something happen?" she asked.

"The Doctor told me she was never meant to be permanent. And I do believe him on that. But I think she left before either of us expected she would," Mickey said, looking out at a pair of children, bundled against the cold, playing on a nearby slide. "She wasn't really fitting in all that well. She didn't take to the adventure as well as... well, as well as some of did. I think she missed her home and her customs and her way of life. She got frustrated with the Doctor and how he behaved sometimes. He seemed to get annoyed with how prim she could be sometimes. She wasn't a big one for letting down her hair. Saw a few planets and then asked to be taken home."

Rose blinked, feeling the world tip beneath her seat. Reinette hadn't stayed. "What did the Doctor think about that?" she asked, giving up the pretense of sounding casual altogether.

Mickey gave her a knowing look. "I think he was relieved. He enjoyed having her there, we both did. Reinette was a nice woman, genuinely charming. Things were starting to get tense and she was getting unhappy with life on the TARDIS. It was for the best," he said.

This was so not what Rose had been expecting that she was at a loss. She didn't know what to say. Should she be... glad that Reinette hadn't adjusted to the traveling lifestyle? That didn't feel right, but she did feel a strange sense of relief all the same.

"I'm sorry she didn't fit in," Rose said and she found she meant it. Her problems with the Doctor hadn't really had anything to do with Reinette personally, after all.

Mickey placed his hand on her knee comfortingly. "Rose, there wasn't anything going on with Reinette and the Doctor," he told her.

She waved a hand, hoping it looked like it didn't matter to her. "It's none of my business what he does behind closed doors," she said.

"I'm serious. There wasn't anything going on behind closed doors. It's a big ship but I like to think I would have noticed something. Reinette always went to her room pretty early in the evening. Alone. The Doctor... he'd disappear into the ship for hours on end but he was always in the console room in the night when we were sleeping. I'd get up now and then for a little snack in the middle of the night and find him there, tinkering away. He maybe hugged her a few times that I saw, but it was always just friendly. I can tell the difference," he explained.

Rose was quiet, thinking about this. She'd assumed that the Doctor had been interested in Reinette. If not romantically, then at least physically. He had kissed her, after all, and that whole day on the spaceship he'd completely focused on Reinette. On New Earth, he'd had his eyes on her constantly. She couldn't reconcile what she'd seen and what she knew with what Mickey was telling her.

"It doesn't matter," she finally said. "He didn't feel that way about me either. And now that he's dropped you off, he's probably out searching for our replacements."

Mickey fixed her with a hard look that startled her. "That's not fair, Rose," he chided. "You haven't seen him these last eight months. He's been a right miserable git most of the time. And that started before Reinette left. That started, actually, the day you left. He came back to the TARDIS and disappeared for a whole day. We had no idea where he'd gotten to and when he finally resurfaced, he looked... well he looked awful. He didn't improve much after that. He misses you, Rose, I know he does."

Rose signed as frustration course through her. "He makes no sense at all," she cried suddenly. "If he missed me so much, if he didn't want me to go so much, why didn't he do the one thing that could have kept me there? Why didn't he come back for me when Reinette left?"

"He's just a bloke," Mickey said as a way of explanation. "He may be an alien and the most brilliant being in the universe but he's still just a bloke. You asked to leave; you were pretty angry with him there at the end. Maybe he thought your feelings for him had changed? Maybe he didn't know your feelings at all to begin with."

Rose tried to picture the Doctor feeling insecure about anything and had a difficult time. He always put on a confident front. But then she remembered his previous self, how he'd had a strong and tough exterior and how inside he'd been an open wound. He'd only ever let her see that side of himself and she cherished that trust. After he regenerated, he'd seemed to be so much more sure of himself, so much more healed. But maybe he wasn't healed, at least not entirely. Maybe there was an open wound in there. That he would still be hurting and not show her made her feel very sad all of a sudden. She also felt naive. Did that mean he didn't trust her anymore? Did she trust him, after everything had happened?

"I never really thought of it that way," she said slowly. "Anyhow. Not like it matters now, right?"

"He didn't swan off," Mickey told her. "Well, he might have. If your mum hadn't gotten ahold of him." He grinned at that.

Rose blinked. "What do you mean? What did mum do?"

Mickey snorted. "She went stalking up to the TARDIS, banged on the doors until he opened them and then slapped him. And I mean, hard. I bet everyone in the building heard it."

She cringed. While she admired her mother's protective nature and aggressive spirit, she thought that sometimes she could go a bit too far. "Oh, no," she groaned. "And he didn't try to scarper after that?"

He shook his head, looking a little gleeful. "Nope. Your mum gave him an earful and then told him that he'd be marching himself up to her flat to wait for you to come home. She wants you two to talk," he warned her.

Rose felt her mouth go dry. She'd thought for months now about what she'd say to the Doctor should ever see him again. Now that the moment was nearly upon her, her mind went stubbornly blank. "Oh," she managed and her voice sounded thready to her own ears.

Mickey chuckled. "Trust me, I'm sure the Doctor feels much the same about it," he reassured her. "But he did miss you. I know he did. He wasn't the same without you there. He was quieter, didn't smile as much."

She had a difficult time imagining the Doctor like that, at least since the regeneration. Maybe Mickey was right. Maybe he did miss her. "I'll believe it when I see it," she said, keeping her tone light.

"So are you seeing anyone these days, Rose?" he asked then, startling her.

"Me? No. No, of course not," she answered. Did this mean Mickey was checking because he wanted to date her again? She thought they'd covered all that eight months before, and again before that. "Mickey, I'm sorry but I'm still not... You and I..." How did she say this gently?

He burst out laughing and needed a moment to collect himself. She flushed, realizing she'd misunderstood him. "No, Rose, I know that," he told her, nudging her shoulder with his. "I was just wondering... if you're seeing anyone."

"No, I'm not," she said, shaking her head. "Haven't even wanted to. Though there's guy at work here, Henry, I think he fancies me. He asked me out a few times, always is flirting with me. He's a nice enough guy but I'm just not... not interested."

"Is it because you're still hung up on him?" Mickey wondered.

She sighed. "Maybe," she admitted. "I'll get over it eventually, I'm sure. I hope."

He put a hand on her shoulder and rubbed it companionably. "I don't think you will, love. I think you and him, you're forever. One way or another, I think you're both gone for each other."

Rose made a face. "If he was so gone for me, then he wouldn't have invited Reinette along, would he?" she said testily. "I'm sorry, Mickey. I might be able to believe that he misses me as a friend. But more than that? I don't think so."

"Oh Rose," Mickey said, his voice laced with mirth. "You may have seen the ends of the universe, but you have a thing or two to learn about men."

She shoved him then, a little playfully. "I think I could know all there is to know about men and the Doctor would still throw me for a loop," she said. And it was true. That man broke all the rules.

She thought for a minute and then asked, "Mickey, how long has it been since you dropped me off?"

"A little bit more than it's been for you," he admitted. "About a year, I'd say."

"A year! Wow..." she breathed. "And you said that Reinette had left after a few weeks, yeah? So was it just you and him that whole time?"

Mickey made a show of shuddering. "God, no," he said. "We'd pick up people here and there for short trips, people we'd meet in our travels and that we'd helped or whatever. You know what's strange? The Doctor was always very careful to explain to them that it was a temporary thing. Not permanent. I think that's because of you." He smirked at her.

Well, at least he could learn from his mistakes, she thought to herself. "So it wasn't too lonely up there, then," she said, tucking her tongue between her teeth.

He seemed to catch her meaning. "Nope. I'll admit, a couple of them were birds that I fancied. But like I said, temporary. Thank god for the other travelers too, because himself was just getting crankier and crankier. Like ol' big ears, he was! We stopped bringing other people along, he was getting more hostile and finally I just asked to come home."

Picturing the Doctor she knew now acting like the Doctor she knew then was such a strange picture that she had to force it away. "I'm sorry," she said. "It wasn't all unpleasant, was it?"

He shook his head emphatically. "Oh no. Far from it. I had the time of my life, Rose," he told her and his eyes were shining and she could see the truth of what he said. "I wouldn't have given up a minute. Even with the crabby driver."

After her lunch break was over, Mickey had gone back to the estate to help Jackie keep an eye on the Doctor. Rose chuckled to herself as she ran a sheaf of papers through the photocopier. The idea of having to keep an eye on him, like was some errant child, was too amusing. Of course, she knew that the Doctor wouldn't stay if he really didn't want to. Even the threat of another one of her mum's slaps probably wouldn't be enough to hold him there if he really wanted to leave. Which, of course, meant on that on some level he must want to be there. That thought gave her a little thrill. Maybe he wanted to see her.

She knew she wanted to see him. Every cell in her body right now was screaming at her to leave work, bosses be damned, and go home. She ached to see his face, smattered with freckles that made her fingers itch brush her them over those beloved spots. She could just picture his big brown eyes, watching her in that way he always did, his hair sticking out in all directions like an electrocuted hedgehog, his smile... Oh, that smile might just be her favorite thing of all. He smiled with his whole being, until the light from it was shining from his eyes and she could feel it seeping into her, making her smile too.

Thinking like that wasn't helping with her resolve to stay at work until the day was finished.

In the end, Rose couldn't hold out. There was an hour left before she had to go, but she couldn't wait any longer. She went to Mrs. Stanton and told her that she had a headache. She felt a little guilty for the lie, but she found she could no longer keep her mind focused on her work. Her boss made some concerned clucking noises and told her to go home and put a cool cloth on her head. Rose promised she would do just that and felt another twinge of guilt.

But as she pushed out the doors and stepped out onto the street, she felt a surge of anticipation. She was going to see the Doctor.

 **Chapter 7**

Chapter Summary

Finally, we get Rose and the Doctor's reunion. Will it go smoothly? What comes next?

Without foxmoon, I'm sure this story would still be sitting in Google Docs, growing mold.

Rose's heart jumped around in her chest as she ascended the stairs to her mum's flat. She was so nervous she could almost feel the sweat pouring off her hands. She kept reminding herself that it was foolish to feel this way, that the Doctor was an old friend and certainly no one for her to feel nervous around. Still, she remembered the way they'd left things eight months before and her heart leapt painfully into her throat.

She heard a ruckus as she neared the flat. It sounded like... her mother was yelling. She quickened her steps and pushed the door to the flat open, almost feeling a panic. Hurrying into the sitting room, she saw her mother wagging her finger at the Doctor, who was sitting on the sofa, various mechanical parts spread around him. Mickey sat off to the side in the chair, chuckling into his hand.

"I step out for two minutes to run to the shops for more milk and this is what I come home to? My toaster, ruined?" her mum was shrieking.

"I warned you, mate," Mickey said good naturedly.

The Doctor looked like a deer caught in the headlights. Rose could practically see his mind racing through scenarios and potential outcomes before settling, very diplomatically she thought, on, "But Jackie! I was improving your toaster! A perfect slice, every time!"

It was such a familiar scene that her heart ached and she felt warm and content. Sure, her mum was yelling (when wasn't she yelling?), but it was with affection in her tone. Mickey was teasing, but she knew from plenty of experience that Mickey only teased those he cared about. And the Doctor, he didn't have to put up with any of this, but here he was, in her mum's sitting room, dismantling her toaster. She wanted to take this moment and tuck it away in her memories forever, so she could pull it out and cherish it on cold, difficult days.

The Doctor noticed her first, seconds it seemed after she'd entered the room. He froze, still looking at Jackie. He remained still for a moment, his eyes sliding closed. She was watching him closely, trying to gauge his reaction. Her mum and Mickey seemed to notice his reaction at the same time and she heard her mum mutter, "What the bleedin'..."

"Rose!" Mickey called, finally seeing her standing in the doorway. "I didn't hear you come in."

Her eyes were locked on the Doctor. He opened his eyes and slowly turned to look at her. They could have been the only two in the room as far as she was concerned. All she saw was him. His hair still wild, his eyes so brown and bottomless. His mouth had dropped open slightly, and his tongue touched the back of his teeth in a subtle gesture that was so very... him. She knew she'd missed him. She'd missed him so much that she'd cried herself to sleep more nights than not. But she'd had no idea the depth of how much she'd missed him until this moment. This one shining moment, where her very being ached with love for him and she felt eternally defined in the heart of his gaze.

The Doctor's eyes conveyed a similar feeling as they roamed over her. His expression was unlike any he'd worn before. She felt rooted to the spot. He swallowed and she noticed his white-knuckle grip on the sofa cushion. Finally, she found her voice. "Doctor," she said, in greeting.

He stood up and dipped his head in her direction, his eyes locked on hers. "Rose," he returned.

Just like that, an awkward air settled between them. Rose wanted to run forward and grab him in a hug, never let him go. To just bury her face in his pinstriped coat and breathe him in to her soul. Her fingers curled, itching to pull him against her, sod all else. But she held her ground. They had left things on an unsettling note, and she recalled how he'd hurt her so deeply. He seemed a little uncomfortable as well, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. No one in the room said a word.

Her mum broke the silence at least as she cleared her throat. "Mickey, what do you say you and I go down to the pub and have a drink?" she suggested. "Give these two a chance to... talk."

"Yeah, alright," he said and looked to Rose. "We'll be back soon, okay?"

Rose glanced at her friend and flashed him a smile, which he returned.

She nodded at them both and they left the flat a moment later, shutting the front door behind them. The flat plunged back into silence, but Rose no longer felt rooted to the spot. She moved forward, into the sitting room. The TV was still on and she crossed to it, turning it off. The Doctor cleared some of the toaster pieces off the sofa, placing them on the coffee table.

"Here, why don't you sit down?" he said chivalrously. "You've been at work, on your feet all day."

Rose sat down and as he settled next to her, she became very aware of him there. "So..." she began, desperate to break the silence that had descended again. "How has it been, stuck here all afternoon?"

He rubbed the back of his neck. "As awful as I would have expected it to be," he admitted. "She made me watch 'Eastenders'. Honestly, she shouldn't be surprised that I took apart her toaster after that."

She chuckled. "And have you improved it, like you told her?" she asked.

He poked out his lower lip, which did something to make her stomach roll, and nodded slowly. "Mostly. Just have to put it back together now."

She gestured to the parts scattered around them. "Don't let me keep you from it," she said easily.

He smiled at her and set to work. She knew he always relaxed better when he had his hands busy. And... there went her mind again. She blushed and concentrated on schooling her thoughts.

"How've you been, Rose?" he asked and although his tone was casual, she knew better.

"I've been better," she replied, watching as his nimble fingers worked the pieces of the toaster back together. "But it also could be worse. Work has kept me busy, as has studying for my a-levels."

"Jackie told me about what you've been up to," he murmured, using his sonic to connect two pieces back together. "I think that's brilliant, that you've managed all of that in eight months."

She flushed, embarrassed. "It wasn't much, honest," she told him. "Mostly was just trying to keep myself out of the flat."

He set down the half-finished toaster and turned slightly to face her. "No, but it was brilliant," he insisted. "It would have been so much worse... to come back here and find you'd been in the flat this whole time. But you said you wanted to make something with your life and then you did. That's just... amazing."

Her cheeks were now flaming. She lowered her eyes and toyed with the edge of the afgan her mother kept draped over the back of the sofa. "Thanks. I was mostly just trying to keep myself sane," she said.

The light in his eyes flickered a little. "I'm sorry, Rose," he said, his voice rough. "I should... never have let you go."

She smiled a little then. "I don't know if you could have stopped me. I was very stubborn," she replied.

His eyes twinkled. "Yes, you were. But I could have... done things differently," he said, picking his words delicately.

She chewed on the inside of her cheek a little. "Probably," she said slowly. "So where's Reinette?" It was probably a dirty trick on her part but she couldn't help herself. The Doctor didn't have to know that Mickey had told her about Reinette yet. She wanted to hear the story from his own lips, she wanted to hear what he had to say about it.

The Doctor set the unfinished toaster aside and sat back against the sofa cushions. "Back in France, 18th century, safe and sound," he said on a sigh.

"I'm sorry to hear it," she told him, and hoped he would go on. When he didn't show a sign of elaborating, she tried again. "You must miss her."

He looked at her then and his eyes were dark. "Rose, I didn't... She and I were not..." He pushed his hand through his hair, obviously struggling. "She wasn't you."

"Oh," she murmured, suddenly unsure why she'd brought up this subject to begin with.

"She was a lovely woman and very interesting. But she wasn't you," he continued, his voice insistent. "She didn't like to run, Rose."

"Oh," she repeated. "Well, the running is rather important to the lifestyle."

He smiled at her and his eyes were searching hers, looking for an answer to a question he hadn't asked. Well, maybe he'd asked it once before but things were different now. "The running is very important, Rose. You're the only one that seems to really understand that," he said, his tone one of wonder.

She decided to go out on a limb, just a little bit. "I miss it, you know," she told him. "The running. That life we had."

His eyebrows shot up and it never occurred to her that he'd be surprised that she missed it. "You do? Even with the life you have here now?"

"Of course I do," she said. "This, what I've been doing here, it's not what I want to do. I'm doing it because I have to, not because I want to."

He furrowed his brow. "But you're realizing your potential," he argued. "You're doing something for yourself."

She sighed impatiently. "Doctor, you really don't get it, do you?"

"Get what?" he asked, studying her.

"This life, here on Earth, the slow path... that isn't what I want. Not anymore," she tried to explain.

A light seemed to dawn behind his eyes. "Really?" He sounded so incredulous that it made her heart ache a little.

"Yes, really. Face it, you've ruined me for a life on Earth," she said, teasing a little and letting her tongue touch the corner of her smile. She saw his eyes dart to her mouth and the atmosphere in the room changed just like that.

"That... that's..." he stammered. "That's good to know."

Now she was looking at his mouth too, noticing his lower lip and how soft it looked... While she was noticing this, she also noticed how close he was getting. His head was dipping towards hers and her heart caught for a moment, wondering if this would be the moment that he kissed her, that he initiated the contact. She inhaled carefully, not wanting to startle him out of this moment and his scent filled her. Spicy, fresh and utterly intoxicating...

The sound of the front door opening and then shutting broke through the moment, her mum and Mickey's voices chattering drifted into the sitting room. Rose blinked and sat back (when had she leaned forward?) and noticed the Doctor did the same thing. He was blushing a most intriguing shade of pink and studiously not looking at her when they entered the room. Mickey took one look at them sitting on the sofa and seemed chagrined. Her mum looked uncertain as well. Clearly, they thought they'd interrupted something. And clearly, they had.

The Doctor stood up suddenly, jamming his hands into his pockets. "Well, I should probably get back to the TARDIS now," he said.

Everyone looked startled. Rose noticed her mum and Mickey exchange a worried look. As for her, she felt the bottom of her stomach dropping out. Was he leaving then? Was this it?

"You'll be back, right?" she blurted out, cringing inwardly at the desperate note she heard in her own voice. "Mum can fix us all some breakfast, yeah?" She looked at her mum then, pleading with her silently.

Her mum blinked a few times and then nodded. "Sure, a right proper fry up. You've got to come back for that," she insisted.

The Doctor smiled. "That sounds great," he said. He turned to Rose. "I promise, I'll be back in the morning."

Rose smiled back, feeling relieved. Tonight had definitely been awkward but she wasn't quite ready to let him get away just yet. After telling herself for eight months to move on, she found herself now in the span of one single day wanting to hold onto him just a little while longer. Logic told her it was foolish, but her heart was lost for that man and their life together.

The Doctor left without much further delay and Rose excused herself to her room, wanting to avoid the prying eyes and questions of her mum and Mickey. She could tell already that they were curious about what had happened while they were down at the pub and she didn't feel like discussing it with them. Instead, she tucked herself under her duvet and ran through those awkward moments in her mind, picking them apart and putting them back together again.

She'd just about drifted off to sleep when she heard her mother's angry voice. "What is all this still doing out? He better be coming back and he betterfinish fixing my toaster!"

The Doctor let himself into the TARDIS. He took off his long coat, tossed it over a strut like he always did. He heaved a sigh and felt the TARDIS' hum change in tone. She sounded... aggrieved.

"I know, old girl," he murmured, running a hand along the console. "I lost my nerve, I think. Me, a Time Lord!"

The answering hum sounded more amused and he smiled in spite of himself. His TARDIS always did enjoy a good bit of humor at his expense. He knew his ship missed Rose too and had likely been hoping he would have brought her back with him. Come to think of it, he rather wished the same thing. If only he hadn't chickened out, he could have.

He slumped into the jump seat and propped his feet up on the edge of the console. When he'd first seen Rose that evening, when she'd arrived home after work, he'd been overwhelmed with the urge to grab her and hold her close to him and never let her go. She looked good. She looked amazing. It must be the effect of the separation because she looked even better to him now than he could ever remember her looking. That was saying something, of course, as she had always looked beautiful to him. It felt like there hadn't been a time where he'd known her where he hadn't desired her in some way. She didn't even look all that different than she had eight months before. She had been wearing a nice, pressed pair of trousers and a soft blouse which was worlds different from the hoodie and jeans he was accustomed to seeing her in. Her hair was also styled slightly differently, the color a more natural blonde than before and styled in soft waves around her shoulders. She wore her makeup differently, it was softer around her eyes. That was all just the physical wrapping through. As with before, her beauty to him was deep in her soul, in how she saw the universe and how she saw him. He didn't think that had changed in these last eight months. At least he hoped it hadn't.

Was it just the experience of being away from her all this time that made her so attractive to him? Did absence really make the heart grow fonder? He definitely wouldn't have thought it possible.

He'd felt so concerned with saying or doing something that might upset Rose and would push her further away from him. The end result, unfortunately, had been an awkward conversation. He thought she might have been open to him though, which was encouraging. If she wasn't completely disgusted by him after everything that had happened, then perhaps he could win her back. Even if all she wanted was to be his best friend and traveling companion again and nothing more, he would take it gratefully.

He wondered about that. That maybe she was interested in exploring things further with him. He'd nearly kissed her tonight. He'd wanted to, very badly, and he'd had the impression that she'd wanted him to as well. That... that was interesting.

It was funny. Eight months ago, kissing Rose Tyler had topped his list of no-no's. He'd done a series of admittedly foolish things in order to prevent that very thing from happening. He'd been successful, it turned out, but a little too successful. Pushing Rose away altogether had been the worst thing that could have possibly happened. He'd had a lot of time to think in the last eight months and a lot of time to reconsider his actions. No, kissing Rose Tyler wouldn't be the worst thing ever to happen. Losing Rose Tyler, as it turned out, was far worse. The more considered it, the more he knew that kissing Rose had been more of an eventuality and he'd just been too dense to realize it.

He might know almost all the secrets of the universe, but clearly one small facet of it was still a great mystery to him; women!

 **Chapter 8**

Chapter Summary

The Doctor and Rose are tip toeing around one another. How long will they be able to keep that up before one of them gets too frustrated?

HUGE thanks to Kelkat9 for her help with the eggplant people. ;) And as always many thanks to foxmoon because without her this would never see the light of day.

Mickey joined Jackie in the kitchen, groaning in frustration. "Those two are going to drive me barmy," he told her, leaning against the countertop and watching as she sliced sausages into the hot pan on the stove.

"Still not talking?" she asked, turning the sausages with a flipper, browning each side.

"Oh, they're talking alright. Just not about the things they should be talking about," he said with a roll of his eyes. "It's all polite chit chat. How are you, how did you sleep, lovely weather today. Meanwhile, you could cut the tension out there with a knife, it's so thick."

"Good lord," Jackie groaned, tipping the sausages out onto a plate. "It's going to take ages for these two get their heads out of the arses at this rate."

Mickey nodded and then turned to retrieve mugs for their tea from the cabinet next to his head. "Unless we maybe grease the wheels a little," he suggested.

"Oh? What'd you have in mind?" she wanted to know as she filled the mugs with tea from the kettle and added tea bags.

"Rose hasn't done much socializing lately, right? Add in the tension brewing with her and the Doctor, I'm sure she's ready to let her hair down," he replied. "Now, I know the Doctor pretty well by now and I know when it comes to our Rose that he's a bit on the protective and possessive side. Maybe that was more the case when he was ol' big ears, but I think it's still got to be true on some level."

"I'm following you," Jackie said. "Go on."

"I was thinking we could have a party here, tonight. Invite my friends, invite Rose's old friends, invite your friends. We could also invite that guy from her job who's sweet on her," he continued.

Her eyes widened. "There's a bloke at her job that fancies her? She never told me this!" she cried. "What's his name? What has she told you?"

"His name is Henry. All I know is that he works with her and that she's turned him down for dates," he said.

Jackie chewed her lip thoughtfully. "So we could have this party, call it a welcome home bash for you! You know how this lot is, any excuse for a party! How are you going to find this Henry bloke though? It's Saturday, they probably won't be at the office today."

Mickey shrugged. "Some people put in hours on Saturdays, I figure I'll call up the publishing house and ask for a Henry who works on the fourth floor. That's what you told me, right? That Rose works on the fourth floor?"

She nodded. "Yeah. So you're just going to take the chance that he's working today?"

"Yeah, that or maybe I can get a last name off them. If I get a last name, I can look him up. And maybe he'll know other people from work that Rose is friendly with to invite as well," he said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

"I wouldn't hold your breath on that one. Rose hasn't been much in a friendly mood the last eight months," Jackie warned.

"Well, I figure at the very least, we'll give her a good reason to let down her hair tonight. We'll round up plenty of alcohol and let nature take its course," Mickey said confidently.

She looked skeptical. "I hope you're right. I'm rubbish at matchmaking if this little idea of yours doesn't work."

"I don't see why I have to do the shopping, I already agreed to show up at this silly party," the Doctor grumbled. He was following along behind Rose, pushing the shopping trolley and looking quite put upon.

"Mum asked us if we could go pick up a few things," Rose said to him soothingly, plucking a few bags of crisps off the shelf and setting them in the trolley before marking off an item on the list in her hand. "I figure it gets us out of the flat and away from her and Mickey. Did you think they were acting strangely this morning or was that just me?"

He hummed. "They were giving us some strange looks, I thought. Like they knew something we didn't," he agreed. "Your mother is always a bit dodgy, so I wrote it off."

Rose smacked his arm lightly. "Be nice," she warned. "I don't know. I got the feeling that they were watching... us."

"Oh," he said. She chanced a look at him and saw his brow furrowed. "Why do you suppose they'd want to do that?"

She steered them down another aisle, looking for more items on the list her mother had given her. "I think they're worried about us," she murmured. She didn't add that she was worried too. "Maybe they think we might start fighting? Or that you'll storm off and leave? Or that I'll do something stupid and chase you away? Who knows."

The Doctor was quiet. They didn't speak for a while, just kept cruising the aisles and putting food in the trolley as they went. Then he finally spoke. "Maybe they're right to worry," he said.

"Yeah. We haven't exactly been talking," she pointed out. "Not about what's important."

"We used to be able to say anything to each other, Rose," he said, sighing. "I miss that."

"I do too," she replied. "I don't know how to get that back. I don't."

She looked at him again and noticed his expression. It was sad and thoughtful and she wondered if maybe, just maybe, he missed her as much as she missed him. She didn't get a chance to ask him, however, because in the next moment his expression had changed entirely. He was whipping out his sonic and dashing forward, leaving her with the trolley.

"Where are you going?" she cried.

"Did you see that?" he asked, his voice tinged with excitement.

"See what?" she called as he ran further ahead. She chased after him, pushing the trolley and trying not to crash into anything.

"Here, in the produce section! That eggplant moved," he said, coming to a stop right before a display of eggplants. She peered at the vegetables skeptically.

"Which eggplant would that be then?" she asked.

He turned and gave her that look of his that said she'd dribbled on her shirt again. "The eggplant that is no longer here, of course," he replied.

Rose sighed and repressed a smile. This scenario was so achingly familiar that she wanted to grab it with both hands and hold on tight. "Where did it go?" she asked him. It was entirely possible he invented this to get himself out of an uncomfortable conversation but there was always the off chance that he was being serious. She still understood that was the thing with the Doctor, she never knew and usually she ended up just going along for the ride.

She loved the ride.

"Let's see," he muttered, dropping to his knees and running his sonic along the tiles of the supermarket floor. "I think it went this way." He pointed in the direction of the dairy case. He hopped back to his feet and started off.

"I didn't know there was such a thing as a sentient eggplant," she said as she followed after.

"It's not really an eggplant," he told her, scanning around him. "It just looks very much like an eggplant. Which would explain why it's hiding out in a supermarket. Very easy to blend in when you look like produce. Without looking closer, I'd say it was a Kreptorian. Uncanny resemblance, really. But really, they aren't known for leaving their system so what is it doing here?"

"Sight seeing? World domination?" she suggested, her tongue tucked firmly in her cheek.

"Don't be silly, Rose," he said distractedly as he scanned the dairy case with his sonic. "Kreptorians are a peaceful race. They wouldn't know world domination if it came up and bit them in the.. stem."

She grinned. "Yes, of course. Sorry."

"Ahh... what have we here?" he murmured, leaning closer to the egg display. His hand shot out and grabbed something from behind a stack of egg cartons and pulled it out. It was undeniably reminiscent of an eggplant. But it had a face and little arms and legs. She'd seen a lot of strange things in her travels but this had to be somewhere near the top of the list.

"Found you!" he crowed. The eggplant...er... Kreptorian looked distinctly embarrassed.

"Many apologies," the being said in a small, wheezing voice. "I didn't mean to give you chase. I was just... I was trying to... oh, what's the use?" He...it... looked utterly despondent and Rose felt her heart twinge for the little vegetable look-alike.

"What are you doing here on Earth?" the Doctor demanded and the Kreptorian flinched at his harsh tone. Rose sent him a sharp look which he pretended he didn't see.

"My ship, it broke down. We came here, just to look. I promise!" the little alien gasped. Rose smirked. Sight-seeing! She'd called that one.

"We? There's more than one of you?" the Doctor asked. Rose glanced around, suddenly grateful that the store wasn't too busy this early on a Saturday. How would they explain the Doctor having a conversation with a sentient eggplant next to the dairy case?

"Yes... myself and … my friend. Er... she's back in the ship. She's rather not speaking to me right now actually," the Kreptorian explained, looking sheepish.

"I can probably help you sort your ship," the Doctor offered.

"Oh, many thanks. I'm Glerik, and I'm forever in your debt," the alien enthused.

"It's no trouble, Glerik," Rose said, smiling at him warmly. "My name is Rose and this is the Doctor. We do this sort of thing all the time, helping people."

"Very pleased to meet you, Kind Rose! You say you help people? Can you maybe help me?" he asked.

"We are helping you," the Doctor said. "Remember? I said I'd help you fix your ship?"

"Yes, and thank you so much Clever Doctor. But, well... I was wondering if maybe you and Kind Rose could help me with something else?" Glerik asked, his wheezing voice sounding downright tremulous.

"What is the problem?" Rose prodded. "We'll see what we can do."

"Rose, I really don't think we have the time..." the Doctor said quietly and she elbowed him.

"Well," Glerik said uncertainly, "It's my friend. Her name is Viteea. She... she means everything to me. We are great friends, her and I. But I... I made some mistakes recently. She's angry with me and I don't know how to make her happy with me again. That's why I'm here in this store. I thought I could find something to help fix the ship and maybe something to make her smile too."

Rose couldn't help but spot the similarities between Glarik's issues and her own issues with the Doctor. She smiled encouragingly at him. "I'd love to help, Glarik," she told him and he beamed at her. "I think the most important thing is you need to talk to her. Don't be afraid to tell her that you're sorry and how much she means to you."

The Doctor rolled his eyes dramatically. "I can't believe we're talking relationships in the middle of a supermarket with an eggplant alien," he muttered. "Can we get back to the issue at hand here?"

Rose shot him a glaring look. "Look, just because you have repressed your feelings so far that you don't even know you have them any longer, doesn't mean that everyone else in existence has. Some of us have feeling and emotions and those are every bit as valid as anything Mr. High and Mighty Time Lord deems worthy!"

His mouth gaped open as he stared at her. Still glaring, she reached out and plucked Glarik from his fingers. "Come with me, Glarik. We'll go outside and then you and I can talk about this while the Doctor deals with the things he considers more important," she said stiffly. And then, under her breath but still loud enough that she knew he could hear. "Which is obviously not anything remotely domestic."

She left him with the trolley and stalked out of the store, leaving him gaping at her next to the dairy case.

Rose had left the shopping list in the trolley so the Doctor had resumed the shopping by himself. He picked up the few items left on the list and then had checked out. Jackie had given him a wad of money to purchase the groceries with which is a good thing since he had no money on him to speak of. He hadn't thought the cashier would have appreciated him paying using Braxtonian coins, after all.

He had carried the groceries outside and found Rose with Glerik under a tree next to the supermarket. Rose still had seemed to be upset with him and he'd tried to put his thoughts about that aside as he had helped Glerik repair his small ship. Rose had spoken with Viteea in low voices but the overall tone he'd gotten from her was one of sympathetic understanding.

It hadn't taken long at all to repair Glerik's ship. It had ended up being a very simple solution but he couldn't fault the alien for not noticing it before or knowing how to fix it. It had taken only a matter of minutes to reroute some of the couplings and then he'd charged the fuel tanks with a handy setting on his sonic and the Kreptorians were back in business. They had both waved the aliens goodbye as they took off.

As soon as the ship had disappeared, Rose had grabbed the shopping bags and started walking back to the estate. The Doctor had to hurry to catch up with her. She hadn't so much as acknowledge his presence next to her. He tugged on his ear as he considered what he'd done wrong this time.

She'd been annoyed at his reaction to Glerik's relationship issues in the supermarket. That much he'd easily been able to figure out. He wasn't completely thick. He'd seen some parallels between Glarik's difficulties with his friend and his own with Rose but he quite honestly didn't know what to think of it. He suspected this was why Rose was so aggravated with him, that he had been so dismissive of the whole situation. But she knew that he often griped about domestics; that was practically a theme in their travels together. Less so now since he'd regenerated but the point still stood.

The fact of the matter was that he just wasn't comfortable talking about this stuff. It was hard enough when it was just Rose and him, but with someone else there? Well that was practically impossible. Even so, by Gallifreyan standards he was setting the curve for emotional awareness. Time Lords had striven for emotional aloofness and it was a facet of that old society he'd always had a hard time maintaining. Since he'd met Rose, it had been even more difficult to remain detached. Plus, through her he'd seen the importance of understanding emotions and how they related to connecting to other people. He hated to admit it, but he was kind of curious about what Rose had said to the aliens to help them work through their problems. Perhaps if he knew, he could put that advice to work.

The Doctor looked at Rose as she walked next to him, radiating irritation. Was she mad at him because of the aliens? Or was it because of the still tenuous situation between them? He'd have to chip through her frosty demeanor and see if he couldn't figure out what she was really thinking.

He reached into his pocket, feeling around for the plastic package he'd picked up in the checkout line. Locating it, he pulled it out and opened it up. He extended it toward her and smiled as charmingly as he could. "Care for a jelly baby?" he asked her.

She glanced at him and her expression was still cool and distant. She looked at the package as if it contained live scorpions. "It's going to take a lot more than a jelly baby," she muttered.

He popped one of the candies into his mouth before tucking the package back in his pocket. He chewed thoughtfully, watching Rose's profile and noticing the stiff set to her shoulders. This... attitude of hers... had to be more than just Glerik's difficulties with his lady friend. And, he had to admit as he shoved a hand through his hair, he was getting a little tired of trying to figure it all out on his own.

Not for the first time that day, and almost assuredly not for the last, he was dreading this party.

 **Chapter 9**

Chapter Summary

In an attempt to bring the Doctor and Rose together, Mickey and Jackie have thrown a party. Will their plan work brilliantly or fail spectacularly?

HUGE thanks to my beta, foxmoon, because she really helped me steer this chapter in the right direction.

Rose yanked a little too hard on the brush in her hair, causing a few hairs to tear out. She winced at the pain and tried to soften her strokes. She was just so... angry. Frustrated and angry. This shouldn't have come as a surprise to her, after all. No one in the universe could frustrate and anger her quite like the Doctor could.

She'd been reminded all too well about what their problems were at the supermarket when they had met Glerik. The poor little fellow had been sincere about making up with his friend, whom it became apparent was more than just a friend to him. He'd upset her unintentionally and unlike some Time Lords Rose knew who were in similar situations, was trying to do what he could to make it up to her. Rose had given him some advice and then had spoken to Viteea, had listened to her side of the story and commiserated with her. She'd given her advice as well and urged her to hear Glerik out. On the whole, she felt she'd done some good for the poor alien couple.

It had just underlined, in a major way, what their problems right now were. He'd messed up with her pretty bad. That's why she'd left eight months before. As of yet, he hadn't done a thing to try to make it up to her. Then again, what had she said to him? Maybe she was also holding her cards close to her chest. And maybe that was because she was scared. Was he scared too? Hmm. Something to think about.

She set her brush down and then, watching her robe-clad form in the mirror over her vanity, she smoothed her hands over her hair. Should she leave it down or put it up? Maybe she'd pick when she decided which outfit to wear. She turned to her wardrobe and considered the outfits she found in there.

There was a soft knock at her bedroom door and she called out, "Come in!"

Her mom eased into the room and closed the door behind her. She had a half finished drink in her hand and Rose would have rolled her eyes at her mother already drinking so early in the evening if it had been at all surprising.

"Why aren't you dressed yet?" she asked, alarmed. "The guests are already starting to arrive! I hope they all fit, Mickey helped me move the sofa and coffee table into my room but any more than about 10 people and this place is standing room only!"

"Relax, mum," she said, sighing. "I just need to pick an outfit."

Jackie joined her at the wardrobe and pawed through the few dresses and tops hanging there. "Blimey, Rose, you really need to go shopping," she muttered critically.

"Mum," Rose groaned, drawing out the syllable. "Not helping."

"How about this one," she suggested, drawing out a hanger. On it was a relatively new dress that Rose had bought on a silly whim just a few months ago. She hadn't worn it, hadn't even had occasion to, but she'd been so taken with it when she'd tried it on in the store (one of the few shopping trips she'd indulged her mother in) that she'd thrown caution to the wind and bought it. It had made her feel good, seeing herself wearing this dress. She saw potential, the ability to become a strong, confident woman and not just a jilted department store clerk when she wore that dress.

The dress was black and sleeveless and made of the softest, silkiest fabric. Rose had no idea what it was called but she was certain it was synthetic. It flowed through her fingers like silk but was very comfortable to wear and far more breathable. The cowl neck dipped modestly in the front but hung even lower in a scoop in the back, the fabric gaping and gathering just above the waist. The top of the dress hung loose and the skirt was fitted at the waist down to where it stopped just a few inches down the thigh. Shiny black sequins accented the waist and hips. It was definitely risque and she definitely couldn't wear a bra with it; the scoop in the back was far too low. She looked at the dress and then at her mother, alarmed.

"Isn't this a little fancy for a party in your flat?" she asked.

Her mum waved a hand dismissively. "You should see what some of the gals who've arrived are wearing out there. Trust me, this is nothing. It's gorgeous and if I recall, it looks even better on you," she urged. Rose continued to look at the dress skeptically and her mum continued, "Your friend, Henry is out there."

Rose looked at her sharply then. "Henry?" Her voice was a squeak. "From work? How?"

Jackie shrugged. "Mickey found him. He called up and asked for him. Once he explained he was a friend of yours, the receptionist was quick to put him through," her mum explained. And then she poked a finger in Rose's ribs accusingly. "You never told me someone at work fancied you!"

Rose groaned, covering her eyes with a suddenly shaking hand. This was a recipe for the disaster. A party, a scandalous dress, a bloke who had a thing for her, a bloke she had a thing for but who was so vague with his feelings for her that she had no idea where she stood... She grabbed her mum's drink right out of her hand and finished it in two gulps, feeling the burn of the gin in her throat. She handed the empty glass back to her smirking mother.

"You're going to need more than that," Jackie predicted.

Rose finished getting dressed in peace, her mother leaving to go greet guests and make sure the snack bowls didn't need refilling. Music already pounded the walls and the steady hum of chatter buzzed over the beat. She wondered if the Doctor was out there yet and if so, what he was doing. Was he hovering around the snacks or maybe chatting up one of Mickey's friends? She doubted he would be dancing. In fact, unless the snacks were located right next to the spot her mother had cleared for dancing, she wagered he'd be standing as far from it as possible without actually leaving the flat altogether.

Once upon a time, he would have been knocking on her door and coming into her room to keep her company until she was finished getting ready. They used to have such an easy camaraderie between them. That had all been lost eight months before and Rose mourned it. She missed her best friend.

She slipped out of the robe and shimmied into the dress. The top was very loose and she was going to have to be careful that she didn't flash more than she wanted to. The skirt was tight and even shorter than she remembered it being. It grazed the tops of her thighs, thankfully covering her bum sufficiently. She made a mental note to avoid bending over, lest she give everyone a show.

The gin was quick to heat up her veins, causing her cheeks to flush. She probably should have eaten more, but her stomach was a nervous mess and tied in knots and eating had been the last thing she'd felt like doing. At least the small buzz it was giving her gave her the confidence she needed to even think about wearing this dress out of her room. She found some strappy black heels to wear with it and fastened them around her ankles, wobbling just a little as she stood. She checked her appearance in the mirror over her vanity and patted her hair. She'd gone for a simple but attractive up-do, one of her favorite easy styles. Whispy hair framed her face and the rest of her hair hung from a casually messy ponytail in the back. She secured a few errant strands with some glittery pins and then checked her makeup. She'd chosen to go relatively light on the eyes, at least by her old standards, opting instead for a more subtly smokey eye. She'd opted for a petal pink lipstick instead of a flashy red. A little bronzer had finished off the look and she thought the hair and makeup went with the outrageous look of the dress very well. She was wearing her standard hoop earrings and as an afterthought, she grabbed a handful of silver bangles off her vanity and slipped them on her wrist. There, that definitely completed the look nicely.

She took a deep breath or two, smoothed her hands down her dress, and then left her room.

A wave of warmth generated by too many people crammed in too small a space washed over her, as did the scent of perfume and sweat and the sound of thumping music. She craned her neck, looking for Mickey or the Doctor. She quickly spotted both. The Doctor was standing, predictably enough, next to the snack table, munching on a handful of crisps and pretending to listen to the girl who was talking his ear off. She recognized the girl as a friend of one of Mickey's friends. She lived in the next building, if she remembered right. Once upon a time, Rose might have been worried about the way this other girl was projecting her attraction at the Doctor. But even with as much of a hit her self-image had taken in the aftermath of Reinette and 18th century France, Rose felt this girl (was her name Cindy?) was no threat to her in any way. The Doctor's mostly bored expression just confirmed that.

Rose spotted Mickey standing next to the drinks table and she hurried over to his side. "Mickey, I need a drink," she gasped when she reached him.

Mickey's eyes swept over her form and he let out a low whistle. "Rose, lookin' good!" he exclaimed. He poured her a cider, he knew it was her favorite, and handed it to her with a saucy grin.

She tried to hide her blush as she took a big gulp of her drink. She was losing her nerve already. Surely, more alcohol would help settle her down. "Thanks, Mickey. I guess I'm not used to parties anymore," she admitted. She downed the rest of her glass and held it out to Mickey. "Fill it up."

He raised an eyebrow but did as she requested. She winked at him and took another long drink of her cider. Maybe she should have asked for a stiffer drink, so she could feel the effects quicker. On the other hand, her face already felt pleasantly numb so maybe the cider was working after all.

It wasn't too long before the alcohol significantly loosened her up. She'd lost count at how many drinks she'd had and she found she no longer cared either. A catchy song came on and she set her glass down with a thunk before shimmying over to the small crowd of dancers. The song was rather suggestive and she'd only heard it a few times on the radio here and there. In that moment, it was her favorite song in the world. She smiled and her hands lifted to sway in the air. The music thrummed through her body and she twisted and undulated to the beat. The music and lyrics and the feelings they brought washed over her, smoothing all the rough edges she'd acquired. She let her eyes drift closed. Everything intensified and it was utterly brilliant...

"Hello, Rose," a familiar voice said from behind her.

Her eyes flew open and she whirled around, moving far too quickly for her tipsy brain to catch up. She stumbled forward and Henry reached out and grabbed her arms, steadying her. She giggled breathlessly and leaned in to him. "Hi, Henry," she said, giving the room a moment to stop spinning. "Fancy seeing you here."

Henry smiled and even in her current state, Rose noticed how he struggled to keep his warm hazel eyes on her face. She looped her arms around his neck, smiling up at him, hoping she wasn't being too pushy. She wanted to dance, she wanted to be free, she wanted to stop bloody thinking.

"Did you want to dance, Rose?" he asked, his voice sounding more certain than he looked. He looked, actually, as if he couldn't quite believe his luck with his mouth hanging slightly open as he stared at her. He was dressed like he would if they were at work with a polo shirt and khaki trousers and she wondered if he'd been at work that day and had just came by after leaving the office. He was a nice looking bloke. In fact, if not for him, Rose would have probably have fancied Henry right back months ago. He was tall, if not as quite as tall as him, but had a more bulky build. He had sandy hair that he kept neatly styled and those warm hazel eyes.

"Thought you'd never ask," she said hoping she didn't sound as tipsy as she felt.

The music shifted to a very popular and rather sensual slow song. Rose had identified with this song in recent months and she thought it must have been a little spot of serendipity that it was playing now. Now, when she was letting herself go and absolutely not wondering where the Doctor was and if he'd seen her in her frankly amazing dress yet. She pushed all thoughts of him out of her mind as she pressed herself up against her co-worker. The music swelled. He had a very kind smile and a dimple in his chin that seemed to be begging her to kiss it.

But nothing's greater than the rush that comes with your embrace And in this world of loneliness I see your face Yet everyone around me Thinks that I'm going crazy, maybe, maybe

So that's what she did. She couldn't raise up on her tip toes since she was already wearing heels. The heels put her almost all the way there, a quick tug on the lapels of his blazer brought him down the rest of the way. She pressed her lips to the indentation in his chin and enjoyed the soft roughness of the skin there. If she closed her eyes and let her mind drift, she could almost pretend that it was him instead. Her heart pounded at the thought.

Henry stiffened under her touch for only a moment. He recovered quickly enough and brought his hands up to her face. He pulled her head back so that he could look into her eyes and she saw his eyes drift down to her lips. He leaned in and pressed his lips to hers, very gently. Rose felt a warning in her head that hadn't been there before he'd kissed her. She'd seen his face, after all, and the spell had been broken. She'd seen that it wasn't himafter all. And now, she wanted to change her answer. She didn't want Henry at all, she never had. He was kissing her and it was just so wrong.

"Rose," spoke a harsh voice close to her ear. It was the Doctor and she should have expected it, really. It gave her the impetus to pull back from Henry, startling her enough that she could feel her own pulse scrambling to catch up. "I need to speak to you. Outside." The sharp tone of his voice contrasted the elation she had felt in her brief fantasy and suddenly she didn't feel quite so out of her head any longer.

She would have laughed if she could only catch her breath. Maybe she was laughing... was that what that noise was? Or was that the song? She realized, belatedly, that she could have set her watch by his reaction. The Doctor had ignored her all evening so far but now, now that she was snogging someone else, now he wanted to talk to her. If only she believed in coincidences.

"I think I'll stay here. Henry and I are sharing a dance," Rose informed him primly, not daring to look at him. If she caught his eye, she'd surely fall under his spell. She might be drunk but she wasn't stupid.

The Doctor snorted, "Is that what you call that? Dancing?"

"Hey mate. You heard her. She's busy," Henry told him, and this time Rose did laugh. She felt she should warn Henry but she wasn't sure what she could say to him that he'd even remotely believe.

"Stay out of it," the Doctor growled at him.

"I'm having fun, Doctor," she told him, cringing at the way her words slurred together. "For the first time in a long time."

"That's not fun," he informed her. "That's called getting pissed. We need to talk."

Rose pulled further away from Henry so that she could round on the Doctor. She put her hands on her hips and hoped that her posture looked at least a little defiant. "That's rich, coming from you," she said. She kept her eyes off his, she still wasn't stupid, but she looked rather pointedly at his shoulder. "You never want to talk unless it benefits you somehow. Forgive me for calling bullshit on that one."

He stepped up to her, drawing himself up to his full height and staring down into her eyes. "Let's have this discussion outside," he said, enunciating each word carefully, evenly.

"I'm staying here," she replied, mimicking his tone.

The Doctor reached out and grabbed her arm and began to pull her from the flat. Henry shouted after them and the Doctor paused for a moment, saying something to Henry before steering her towards the door. She tried to turn and look but he kept the pressure on her arm tight.

"What is your problem?" she asked peevishly, but the Doctor didn't answer. He pulled the door open and they stepped out onto the balcony.

The cold January air shocked her enough that she felt a little of the haze lift from her brain. She rubbed at her shoulders as a brisk breeze blew past them.

The Doctor's lips were pressed in a thin line causing the dimples in his cheeks to stand out as he looked at her. He swung his long coat from his shoulders and wrapped it around her, enveloping her instantly in his warmth and scent. She tried not to let those sensations intoxicate her further but her inhibitions were already so low...

She blamed the effect of the alcohol for not realizing sooner that it was a battle she was doomed to lose.

The Doctor tried to follow what this girl; he was nearly positive she'd said her name was Cindy; was saying to him. Well, that wasn't entirely accurate. He was trying to pretend like he was following what Cindy was saying. Mostly, he was trying to stay out of the way and stay out of Jackie's field of vision. If she saw him, she might come talk to him or ask him to dance or do something equally horrifying to him. He'd been doing a fairly decent job of blending into the shadows, at least up until Cindy noticed him and came over to flirt.

He had no interest in flirting back. Cindy seemed to him to be a bit of a trainwreck. It was on the tip of his tongue to tell her this but he could all but hear Rose's voice in the back of his head, admonishing him against being rude.

He was just nodding at something Cindy had said when he noticed Rose, standing next to Mickey and drinking a large glass of some golden beverage. His mouth went dry immediately as his eyes traveled from the strappy high heeled sandals on her feet, up her long, shapely legs that seemed to go on and on and on, over the straining material covering her hips and highlighting the roundness of her most perfect bum, past the gaping fabric that covered the front of her chest sufficiently but which left her back all but exposed, and finally coming to a rest on her face, the strands of hair framing her cheeks and her eyes smiling warmly at her ex-boyfriend. He swallowed but there was absolutely nothing in his mouth to swallow. It occurred to him that maybe he needed a drink.

Of course, to get a drink he'd need to go to where Mickey and Rose were. It was probably a good idea for him to stay where he was, a safe distance away from Rose and the abundance of skin that she had on display. Otherwise, he might do something ridiculously unwise like sweep her into his arms, carry her into her bedroom and kick the door shut behind them so he could then go on to have his wicked way with her. He blinked a few times to clear the vision from his mind. And now he had another reason to stay by the food. He needed to hide his body's traitorous response to this new mental and visual stimulation.

Eventually, Cindy realized he was no longer responding to her and she wandered off to find someone else to bore. This gave the Doctor a good opportunity to just watch Rose. He watched as she drank even more of the golden beverage and then as she joined the other dancers. Some song about apple bottom jeans and boots with fur on them was playing and it didn't make the least bit of sense to him. But it had a catchy hook and an infectious beat and the crowd seemed to love it. And so did Rose. She began to move to the music in a way he'd never seen her move before. Her movements filled in all the gaps in all the fantasies he'd ever had during the time he'd known her; the sway of her hips, the arching of her back, the reaching of her hands over her head as she tilted her head back, her eyes falling shut...

He was unconsciously taking steps towards her (to do what? dance with her?) when he saw a sandy haired bloke peel out of the group of dancers and approach her. He watched with barely disguised horror as Rose leaned into him, looping her arms around his neck and grinned goofily up at him. His skin prickled as he watched them begin to sway together to the beat of the new, slower song that had come on. He recalled with a sinking feeling, the time he had accused Rose of being jealous and petty. Was turnabout really fair play? Because from where he standing, it felt decidedly unfair.

Unfair began to take all new meaning when he saw Rose pull the bloke down so she could press her lips to his chin. His chin? If he'd had hackles, they would have been raised. But then the bloke had his hands on her face and he was kissing her properly. The Doctor saw red and found he was well past the point at which he could either control or it or even care to control it. He pushed through the crowd of revelers until he stood next to Rose. He grabbed onto whatever restraint he still had left (and wasn't it impressive that he had any at all?) and resisted yanking Rose from this pretty boy's lips the way his fingers were already itching to do.

The Doctor took a deep breath and said her name. She pulled back from the kiss and he felt slightly gratified by that, but not nearly enough to quell the possessiveness pulsing through his veins. He wanted to talk to her outside, away from this git and he told her as much. He was surprised when she resisted. In fact, if he wasn't mistaken, she was rather angry at him for interrupting. Perhaps he was more susceptible to human hormones than he thought he was because the mixture of her dress, the sight of her kissing this wanker with his hands all over her and her righteous indignation put his back right up. Then the git had the nerve to get involved and he found the leash on his anger was beginning to strain.

He grabbed Rose's arm, which probably wasn't his best move considering. The bloke protested, tried to shove the Doctor away from Rose. That was it. The Doctor decided there he was absolutely done dealing with him. He turned swiftly and gave Henry his best Oncoming Storm glare. "She. Is. Mine," he growled at the other man. Then he turned and continued pulling Rose from the stuffy flat, ignoring the gaping faces on his way.

Out on the relative privacy of the balcony, feeling the cold slap a London winter's night, his head cleared some. It certainly cleared enough for him to notice the way Rose was shivering in her abbreviated but admittedly stunning dress. He quickly removed his long coat and settled it around her shoulders. She hugged it to her and he fought a strong wave of... something at the sight of her wearing an item of his clothing. It made him want desperately to see what she would look like in other items of his clothing. His shirt, and nothing else, perhaps...

"So what was that about? What do you think we need to talk about?" she asked, her voice quiet and her words decidedly less slurred.

"I don't like seeing you with another man," he told her. He didn't care how it sounded, it was true.

Rose stared at him for a long moment. "Are you having me on?" she asked. "Because, this is sounding a little bit like a joke right now."

He wasn't quite sure how to answer that. "No, I'm being completely serious, Rose," he said, settling on going with the truth. "Watching you with that... that... pretty boy... I couldn't stand it." He didn't miss the smile that threatened to play across her features at his words.

"You do realize how ridiculous it is for you to say that after everything that happened eight months ago, right?" she pointed out. She cocked an eyebrow at him expectantly.

"Hmm," he hummed. She had a point there. He didn't much like it. "I could maybe argue that. I don't know. All I know is that... he kissed you."

"Yes, he did," she said, now watching him carefully. He met her stare, captivated all over again by her shining eyes, the soft curve of her cheek, and the tempting plumpness of her lips.

"I wished it were me," he murmured, stepping closer to her and breathing in her scent as he did so. She smelled of lavender and vanilla and that heady aroma that he could only describe as Rose.

"You- you did?" she asked and her voice was breathy. She was staring at his lips, he couldn't help but notice, and the knowledge made his blood rush through his veins.

"Rose," he pleaded before he dipped his head and finally claimed her lips with his own.

Whatever he'd been expecting about kissing Rose Tyler, he'd clearly not been using his imagination to its fullest capacity. He'd kissed her before, to save her life and that kiss had tasted of Time and Death and the Wolf. He'd been a bit distracted at the time, sadly. The next time, she had kissed him but it hadn't been her at all. It had been that flap of skin, Cassandra, and it had tasted of desperation and psychic energy. He'd been far too surprised to pay proper attention or even respond adequately. There was also that all too brief moment outside that beautiful marketplace on that lovely planet but that contact had been nearly chaste in comparison. Now? Oh... now.

Her lips slid beneath his as if that was what they had been crafted to do. She had a hand at his back, under his suit jacket and grabbing at his shirt with a tight fist. Her other hand was at the nape of his neck, her fingers curling into the hair at the back of his head, causing him to shiver. He in turn was gripping her hip, his fingertips just grazing the skin exposed at her back. His other hand was gripping the back of her head firmly, holding her still as he stroked her lips with his tongue, encouraging her to open to him.

Rose obliged rather eagerly and as her tongue brushed against his, his answering groan was muffled in her mouth. She tasted incredible, not of time or desperation or any of what he'd detected before with her. She tasted like apples and something so incredibly sweet that it made it jaw hurt just to contemplate it. As he explored her mouth and her taste, he realized that this wouldn't be enough for him. This could never be enough for him. This little taste, a little glimpse at she was truly inside, only was stirring his appetite. Arousal was pulsing through him and he was suddenly aware that he would not be able to stop until he claimed her fully.

This thought was enough to have him pulling back, though he still held her close to him. He watched as her eyes fluttered open and he searched their whiskey colored depths for a hint about how she was feeling. He saw desire and it was enough to make him want to tremble with need. He couldn't do this, not here and not now. Kissing Rose was a mistake; he'd let himself get overwhelmed with jealousy and arousal.

The Doctor released her and stepped back, reaching up to tug at his ear nervously. "Uh- I'm.. I- I should go," he stammered, keeping his eyes down.

"Doctor?" Her voice was questioning and sounded... hurt. He cringed. Even when he was doing everything in his power to try to prevent hurting her, he hurt her.

"I'll see you in the morning, Rose," he mumbled, before he turned and walked swiftly towards the wing doors. His blood pounded in his ears and the word "stupid" was chanting through his mind in a million different languages. He didn't know which made him more stupid, kissing her or walking away afterward. He decided both theories worked together nicely and shoved through the door before hurrying down the stairs.

Rose stood at the railing of the balcony, shaking. She was still wearing the Doctor's coat so it wasn't the cold that was affecting her. No, she definitely felt warm enough. In fact, as the memory of the Doctor's lips on hers filled her mind, of his tongue moving in and out of her mouth with such precision, she felt distinctly overheated. One thing was for sure, she no longer felt as tipsy and out of control as she had. Between the cold air and the Doctor's embrace, she'd sobered enough that she firmly had her wits about her once more. And perhaps even the beginnings of a nasty headache.

She watched as he burst out of the stairwell and walked with purposeful strides towards the TARDIS she saw parked at the far end of the courtyard. Why had he run off? He'd kissed her like that, finally after all this time, and then he'd acted like he'd been scared. What had scared him? Why was that man so bloody frustrating?

If nothing else, she felt pretty sure that he felt the same desire for her that she did for him. All the stammering and backpedaling couldn't erase the way he'd held her so tightly and so close. He'd wanted her, she was sure of it. And, oh lord, she wanted him. It was taking all of her control and a healthy dose of her own pride to keep from racing down to the TARDIS after him. She could almost envision herself banging on the doors and then grabbing him when he opened them. She would kiss him, wrap herself around him, rip at his clothes and then...

"Rose? Are you okay?" Henry asked, startling her out of her reverie. He'd joined her at the railing of the balcony and she hadn't even noticed.

She turned to look at him and flinched, already feeling guilty. "I'm fine, Henry. How about you?" she said, biting her lip. "I'm so sorry."

He grimaced but his expression held no heat. "Your friend... he's something else. What's the story?" he replied.

She closed her eyes and sighed. "It's a really long and complicated story, Henry," she told him. "A lot of it is why... why I haven't encouraged you or dated you. He and I... it's complicated."

"He's in love with you," he said, sniffing. "That much was pretty bloody clear."

She gaped at him, disbelieving. "What?" she squeaked.

Henry looked skeptically at her. "Oh, come on. It was obvious! The possessiveness, demanding to talk with you, just because you'd been... kissing me, the staring me down, dragging you out of the room... he wanted me to know that you were his. He said as much to me when he grabbed you," he explained to her.

"I-I hadn't heard that, I guess," she mumbled.

"Yeah, well, you were busy getting dragged out of the flat by your arm by that possessive caveman," he grumbled. "Is he your boyfriend?"

She sighed. "No. Not really. Like I said, it's complicated," she said. "But I'm not really available anyhow, Henry. I'm so sorry if I let you believe that I was."

He relaxed a little bit. "It's okay, Rose," he assured her. "I probably shouldn't have kissed you. I knew you were kind of drunk, it wasn't fair."

"Being drunk is no excuse to lead you on though," she said. "I feel bad about it."

"Don't," he instructed her. "It's okay. Already forgotten, yeah?"

Impulsively, she gave him a hug. "Thank you," she said. "For being understanding."

Henry went back to the party but Rose stayed on the balcony for a little while longer. She still felt the urge to march down to the TARDIS and bang on the doors. Except now, the fog of arousal having finally dissipated, she thought she'd rather slap him than snog him. As if they didn't have enough issues to work through between them without having to deal with this as well. He was the one who kissed her and then he was the one who freaked out about it. Just thinking about it made her want to smack him silly.

Later that night, after the guests had all gone back to their homes, Jackie had shooed Rose off to bed. She'd promised her that she and Mickey could handle the rest of the cleanup themselves. While they did, they compared their notes from the evening.

"I didn't pay as much attention as I should have," Jackie admitted, her cheeks pinking as she dumped a load of empty used cups into a large sack of garbage. "I was a bit... distracted. I heard about the ruckus though."

Mickey snorted. "You should have seen it. The Doctor reacted even better than we could have expected," he told her. "I didn't expect him to put on such a show, but the rest of it was just perfect."

"Poor Henry indeed," Jackie agreed. "Maybe our plan worked a little too well."

He grunted and kept pushing the broom across the floor, sweeping up the debris from the party. "Maybe," he said. "At any rate, I'd say that we got something accomplished. But judging by the look on Rose's face when came back in the flat, by herself, that tells me there's still a ways to go with those two."

"I'm not surprised one bit. Those two are the most stubborn people I've ever known," she remarked. "If they need another push, we can see what we can do. But I think we'd best sit back for now and see where this all this leads them."

Mickey nodded. "Yeah, you're probably right." They worked in silence together for a few more minutes before he continued. "Well, it was a fun party at any rate, right?"

Jackie grinned. "I dunno, I think Howard and I missed most of it." Her eyes twinkled and she laughed as Mickey groaned and shook his head at her.

 **Chapter 10**

Chapter Summary

It's the day after the party and what will happen when Rose confronts the Doctor?

HUGE thanks to foxmoon for being such a splendid beta.

Rose was woken by a pounding headache. She groaned, rolled over in her bed and pulled her pillow over her aching head. At least she wasn't sick to her stomach. She couldn't handle that on top of all the baggage from the night before. A tall glass of water and some ibuprofen would set her to right soon enough. Some food on her belly would help too. But considering how pissed her mum had gotten the night before and the pounding in her own head, she didn't think a full English was on the menu for them that morning.

Getting out of bed seemed very unattractive all around. She wanted to stay here, burrowed and warm under the duvet, the room darkened against the dawning light. There were no troubles here, in the warmth and safety of her bed. There was no Doctor, taunting her with his great hair and freckles and lips and... Oh, that was not helping. As she stretched, she became aware that she was still wearing his long coat from the night before. She hadn't taken it off when she'd gone to bed, choosing to wrap herself in it after removing her dress. It smelled like him and if she closed her eyes and let her mind drift, she could pretend that he was laying here with her, enveloping her in his scent. She could feel the silky lining against her legs, her back her arms and it felt marvelous.

Rose couldn't very well hide here all day. Eventually, she'd have to get up and deal with things. She knew, somehow, that it would be up to her to deal with this. The Doctor would certainly be too much of a chicken to initiate any sort of confrontation with her. He'd be perfectly happy to go on from here and pretend like everything that had happened last night hadn't happened at all. Once upon a time, she would have gone along with that in the interest of keeping things stable between them. She'd grown a lot in the last eight months. She was no longer happy to just sweep things under the rug, or just get on with it. For better or for worse, it was time to push the envelope.

With another groan, she pushed back her duvet and sat up. Her head throbbed painfully and she squinting against it. She happened to notice the glass of water and pills on her night table then. That would have been her mum, bless her. Still looking out for her after all these years. Rose gratefully popped the pills in her mouth and drank down the glass of water. Right. Shower. She shrugged out of the Doctor's coat and lay it across her bed before replacing it with her dressing gown.

A shower did wonders to helping her feel more human again. The hot water eased the tension she hadn't been aware she'd held in her shoulders and the steam helped to clear her mind. By the time she stepped out of the shower and dried off, she was feeling almost good as new again. She returned to her room and dressed quickly in a pair of jeans and a purple jumper, grabbing the Doctor's coat before leaving her room to see if there were any survivors.

To her surprise, she found her mum and Mickey sitting at the table, eating breakfast and chatting. This may very well have been the first time her mother had ever woken up before her after a night spent partying. Maybe she was losing her touch.

"Rose! I made you a plate," her mum called when she saw her. "It's on the kitchen counter. Go grab it and come sit with us."

She did as she was instructed and settled down on a chair next to Mickey. She took a bite of eggs and almost moaned at how good the food tasted. Just what the doctor ordered. Speaking of which... "Have either of you heard from him this morning?" she asked. She didn't think she needed to specify which 'him' she was talking about . She caught Mickey glance at her mother and raised an eyebrow.

"Not a peep," he told her. "The TARDIS is still there though, I checked before I sat down to eat."

Rose didn't reply and just concentrated on her breakfast. He was doing exactly what she'd thought he would do. He was hiding. He was scared. She rolled her eyes and tried to focus on her food. Eventually, she had to push the plate away and sit back.

"Aren't you going to finish that?" her mum asked, pointing at her plate with her fork.

"I lost my appetite," she said dully. She waited a moment longer, gathering her nerve. All it took was her picturing the deer in the headlights look on his face the night before, right before he'd run from her. Then she was on her feet. She stopped by her room to grab the Doctor's coat and then headed to the front door.

"Where are you going?" Mickey called.

"To the TARDIS. I'll be back in a few," she called back, slamming the door behind her.

If possible, it was colder outside today than it had been late night. She hurried down the stairs and across the courtyard to where the TARDIS sat. She glared at the doors for a moment before knocking on them. She still had the key on a chain around her neck but she felt that all things considered, she was better of knocking rather than barging right in. They had a few things to work out between them before she could feel comfortable doing that again.

The doors opened a moment later and there he stood. He almost looked surprised to see her standing there. "Oh. Hello, Rose," he said, blinking at her from behind his specs. His hair was standing up even more than usual and his suit redefined the term 'rumpled'. She'd be willing to bet a few quid that he hadn't slept at all last night.

"Hi. We need to talk," she told him shortly. She thrust the coat towards him almost as an afterthought. "And I have your coat."

He plucked the coat from her outstretched hand and then stepped aside to let her into the console room. She charged in, trying not to show the thrill she felt at the welcoming, familiar thrum of the TARDIS as she swept up the ramp. She patted the console tenderly, however, before turning to face him as he came up behind her.

"So, how are-" he began, but he was unable to finish the sentence as her palm connected with his cheek. She hadn't planned to slap him, well, not since the idea first occurred to her last night. But in that moment, her anger and frustration had boiled over and her hand had flown with a mind of its own.

"Ow!" he cried, cradling his cheek and turning wounded eyes on her. "What was that for?"

She set her jaw. "That's for running away last night. Like a coward," she told him.

He stared at her and she saw his eyes flicker. He turned away, walking over to one of the coral struts and ran his hand along it. "I know, Rose," he said, sounding defeated. "I'm sorry. I just... I got overwhelmed."

"And you think that I wasn't overwhelmed? Your answer was to just run off, without talking to me about it?" she asked, and she wanted to cringe at the tearful tone she heard in her own voice.

"I didn't know what else to do," he admitted. "I wanted... I wanted you." He turned around to face her and even from five feet away, she could see the torment on his face.

"Oh," she breathed. She remembered the night before, the way he'd held her, her certainty that he wanted her every bit as much as she wanted him. "So... why? Why did you run?"

He stepped toward her then, tentatively like he was afraid she'd get spooked and make a run for it. "Rose, you don't understand," he said. "I don't do this, I can't do this... you're my friend, you're my companion."

"Companion? Friend? Is that all?" she asked him. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think you kiss companions or friends, the way you kissed me last night."

She didn't miss the way his gaze flicked down to her mouth so briefly before returning to her eyes. "No, I guess not," he answered hoarsely. "But there were rules, on Gallifrey, about this sort of thing..."

Rose cut him off. "Where were these rules when you snogged Reinette? I don't think there are any rules left to live by other than the ones you set for yourself. Maybe you need to ask yourself why you're doing this to yourself? And to me?"

"Rose," he said on a moan, clearly frustrated and conflicted.

"I just need to know," she said, struggling to sound calm now, "that you aren't back here right now just because you lost Reinette and Mickey wanted to go home. I need to know that i'm not some sort of consolation prize... a replacement."

"How could you think that?" he gasped.

"How could I not?" she asked. "I don't... want to think that, obviously. But I need to make sure. For me."

He swallowed and took another step towards her. "I guess I can understand that," he conceded. "You have nothing to worry about, Rose. It was always you that I wanted with me. Then and now. But I need you to understand that this... this is hard for me."

Rose took the last step toward him, bridging the gap. His eyes were wide and a little sad and even a little scared. She reached out and took his hand in hers and she could feel him relax a little under her touch. "I can try," she offered. "Maybe we can work on this, together?"

The Doctor nodded and smiled a little. "I would like that," he told her. "So, would you... do you think you could... erm... do you want to travel with me again?"

He looked like a nervous teenager, asking a girl to dance for the very first time. As angry and frustrated with him as she'd been lately, her heart went out to him a little. She had to remind herself that as smart as he was, he was rather lacking in the human relationships department. "Yes," she replied, smiling wider at him and his smile echoed hers. "I think I'd like that."

With the air cleared somewhat between them, Rose returned to her mother's flat to pack some things and say her goodbyes. She didn't pack much, but then, she didn't have much to pack. She asked her mum to deliver a letter of resignation to her job. She felt a little bad, not giving them the standard two weeks' notice, but she didn't see much way around it. Better to give them short notice than none at all, she figured. She hugged both her mum and Mickey extra tight.

"Are you sure about this, Rose?" Mickey asked after she released him.

She nodded. "I am. I was always meant to travel with that man. I don't know what will happen with us, but I think he's going to be more careful from here on out," she said.

"He better be," Mickey warned. "If I hear different, he'll have me to deal with."

Rose grinned. "I'll be sure to pass that message along," she replied. She walked back to the TARDIS with a lighter heart than she'd had in a long time. She felt nervous too, not knowing if she was being smart or what would happen with them now. But she had hope and that was something.

She walked back into the TARDIS, using her key this time. She carried her knapsack back to her room, hoping that it was still there. Of course, it was and she felt a wave of relief flow through her. Someone, the TARDIS or the Doctor or both of them, had expected or hoped for her to return. She paused for only a moment to drop her knapsack on her bed before turning around to head to the console room. As she reached her door, she spotted the little kangaroo figurine still sitting on her dressing table. She smiled softly, reaching out a finger to stroke along its back.

Rose walked briskly back to the console room and found the Doctor was standing the console, reading a display with a look of deep concentration. She crossed to him to peer at the display, even though the symbols there didn't make anymore sense to her now than they ever had before.

"All right, Doctor?" she asked him.

"A distress signal," he answered, leaning back and removing the specs from the bridge of his nose. He rubbed the spot, squeezing his eyes closed. "It doesn't make any sense though."

"Why not? What is it?" It never signaled good things when the Doctor looked as confused as she felt.

"Well, the signal... it's from a race that has been gone from the universe for centuries. The Alvernon, as they were known. Their planet was destroyed by an expanding sun and they traveled the stars for a while after that but their race was notoriously xenophobic. That meant they didn't believe in... fraternizing with other species. As such, eventually they died out. It was a shame, really. They were dead brilliant at writing poetry and music," he explained.

"If the Alvernon are dead, then how did you get a distress signal from them?" she asked.

"That's the big question, isn't it?" he said and his eyes twinkled at her. The promise of unraveling a mystery was always one of his favorite things. "Let's go check it out, shall we?"

She grinned. She had to admit she loved the mystery as much as he did. It was in her blood now, she was ruined for everyday life. "Yes. Let's."

The Doctor should have known. He really, really, really should have known. It was times like these that he truly felt like the cat who was bested by his own curiosity. It wasn't so bad when it was just him that suffered the consequences of that curiosity, but his tolerance of these situations decreased rapidly when his companions were involved. Doubly so if that companion was one Rose Tyler.

"I'm so sorry, Rose," he said for what felt like the millionth time. "I should have known."

"S'ok, Doctor. I should have known too," she answered. "It's just as much my fault as it is yours."

Wasn't that just like her? Rose was forever trying to ease his guilt, even when she was directly affected. No, he was pretty sure he could place the blame for them currently being locked in a small, dank and darkened room. There was enough room for them to sit side by side, their backs against the wall and their legs outstretched. There wasn't much room otherwise, however. He figured it was probably a holding cell of some kind, courtesy of their new friends. They'd taken his long coat from him and the screwdriver was in the pockets of that coat. As such, their options for escape at the moment were very limited.

It had been a trap. The distress signal had not been sent by the Alvernon at all. They'd arrived at what had appeared to be a deserted passenger cruiser somewhere in the 28th century, only to find that it wasn't so much deserted as it was filled to the brim with Minusians. He'd barely had time to explain to Rose that the Minusians were an oppressive, brutal race with a reputation for capturing other races to use for whatever nefarious purpose they saw fit. As he'd told Rose, if a person was lucky, they were put in a living museum of sorts for the rest of your existence. If they were unlucky, their parts were sold off to their genetic scientists for the purposes of "research and development". If the Minusians got their jollies off of broadcasting the live dismemberment to the rest of the planet, then that was just icing on the cake. Rose had been horrified, and rightly so.

He shuddered now, thinking of the worst possible fate. He felt reasonably certain that they would not have to suffer the dismemberment. If the Minusians had that in mind they likely wouldn't have been as careful when they took them prisoner as they had been. He felt that was a good indication that they had the museum in mind. And museums were far easier to escape from than live dismemberment ceremonies.

Rose hadn't gotten testy with the Doctor once since they'd been captured. She seemed to take the whole thing in stride, which he started to worry maybe said something about the nature of their adventures. He really had missed her, these last eight months. It wasn't the same at all without her there. Having her back with him, even locked in a tiny, dark cell of a room, was a wonderful and miraculous thing. As he was thinking about her, he turned his head to look at her. Even imprisonment agreed with her, though some corner of his mind wondered if that was just because he was incredibly attracted to her. Then he wondered if the difference even mattered.

"I'm sorry," he blurted suddenly.

She smiled and patted his knee affectionately. "So you've already said at least a hundred times. And as I've told you at least a hundred times, it's not all your fault."

"No... I mean... I'm sorry about... about Reinette," he said haltingly. He wasn't sure why he thought now was the time to have this conversation. Other than he quite suddenly didn't want to leave this unsaid between them. She deserved to hear it.

"Oh." She looked at him and even in the near dark, he could see her eyes shining. It made her look so young and vulnerable and he just wanted to gather her in his arms and promise never to hurt her again. "I'm sorry she left."

"I'm not," he told her. "It was time and as I told you before, she wasn't you. Not even close."

He saw her smile. "I'm sorry too," she admitted. "For leaving."

He shook his head and took her hands in his. "No, Rose, you did the right thing. I was stupid. I was worse than stupid. I turned my back on what I knew was true and I had to pay the price for that. I'm only sorry that you were hurt and that you spent any time feeling sad these last eight months."

He felt her hands tremble a little in his and he tightened his grip. "I hated being away from you," she said quietly. "It felt wrong."

"I don't want you to ever have to go away again," he said softly. "I want you to stay with me. Even if you just want to be my companion... I- I don't think I can let you go again."

"You won't have to," she assured him. "And..." She paused, taking a deep breath and he found himself holding his own breath, waiting for her. "I don't want to be just your companion."

His breath whooshed out. "Rose," he said, her name a prayer on his lips, "you have no idea how glad I am to hear that. I'm still... this is still hard for me. Of course it is. But... you're worth it. I know you can help me."

She lifted up a hand to cup his cheek and her expression was so tender that he wondered if both of his hearts didn't skip a beat to see it. "Yes, I can," she whispered. She leaned up then, pulling her legs up under her and rocking forward onto her knees. Her face filled his vision for one stunning moment before her lips brushed gently against his.

It was a different sort of kiss altogether than the one they'd shared the night before. That one had been all about possession and pent up emotion. This kiss was a promise, a breath of life. He kept the contact light, mirroring her hand by cupping her cheek in his, holding her just enough to keep her head steady as he brushed his lips over hers. She sighed against his mouth and he bit back a groan, his fingers already itching to grab her tighter, pull her hard against him. He wanted to keep this kiss like this a moment longer, to get lost in the tenderness and exquisite beauty of it. This embrace was all about connection and emotion and reverence. He wasn't quite ready yet to give that up.

But, blimey, she smelled fantastic. And her lips were already drifting down to his jawline, brushing just as lightly along the skin there, following the line up to his ear where she breathed and pressed her mouth to that spot just below his ear that made his mind go instantly fuzzy. He wanted to return the touch but he seemed entirely unable to do anything but lean his head back and surrender to her delicate caresses.

Why in the universe hadn't they tried this before? All of those times he had wanted to explore a more physical relationship with Rose and he'd resisted. He'd resisted for the same reasons he had conjured up eight months ago to push Rose away from him. Because he wasn't sure that she felt the same, that it was improper to desire a companion, that her life would be over so soon and he'd be left alone. He still worried, especially about that last reason, but in this moment with Rose's hot lips traveling across his neck he found that this experience was most definitely worth it. He felt cherished under her touch and he hadn't felt that way in so very, very long.

A loud clanging noise startled them both and Rose sprang away from him as if she expected to be punished for her ministrations. He reached out and pulled her into his arms as the door to the room they were being held in swung open. Two of their captors, humanoid and more than just vaguely ugly, stood in the doorway. Their bodies were covered with armor but their faces appeared distorted and drawn up, as if they made a practice of sucking on lemons. Their eyes were beady and black, their hair thin and sparse. The Doctor tried his best glare on them as he got to his feet, bringing Rose up with him.

"Grab her," the one guard said to the other. Before he could process what was going on, the second guard stepped forward and took ahold of Rose's arm, pulling her sharply away from his side.

"Rose!" he called, reaching out for her. She was already being pulled out of the open door, too far from his grasp.

"Doctor!" she cried, struggling ineffectually against the guards grasp. "Let go of me! Doctor!"

She was pulled away, out of his line of sight but he could hear her cries echoing down the hall and getting fainter. He lunged forward toward the other guard, just as two more guards appeared at his side, blocking the doorway.

"Where are you taking her?" he demanded, panic starting to set in. He remembered what he knew about the Minusians and fought the sick feeling starting to brew in his stomach.

"That is none of your concern anymore," the guard told him coldly.

"The bloody hell it isn't!" he yelled. "What are you doing with her?"

His question was met with a cool look. "We have use for her," the guard finally replied.

Forget a sick feeling, his stomach was now in the process of folding in on itself. "Please," he pleaded, lowering his voice. "Please, bring her back here. Let her stay with me. I beg you."

"You will be transferred to the museum in the morning. Someone will be by with your prescribed meal in a short while," the guard told him, turning around and walking off as the other guards closed the door, latching it securely.

A keening wail ripped from his lungs as he threw himself at the thick, steel door. He pounded his fists against the cold, unyielding surface until he could no longer feel the sensation. The Doctor sank slowly to his knees on the ground before the door. "Rose," he murmured, pained. He touched the door with his fingertips. He had to find someway to make this right, to save her. Somehow.

 **Chapter 11**

Chapter Summary

Things take a bad turn for Rose and the Doctor is desperate to get her back with him, safe. Will he be too late?

If it weren't for foxmoon, this chapter would make a lot less sense. Trust me.

Rose continued to fight against the guard who had ahold of her until another guard arrived to help subdue her. She was held between the two of them, her struggles now completely useless and only serving to exhaust her further. She stilled, deciding it would be wiser to conserve her energy. She didn't know where they were taking her or why but she had to believe that an opportunity to escape would present itself.

She was shoved into a room and the door was slammed shut quickly behind her. She whirled around, ran to the door and tried to figure out if there was a way to get it open. She patted her hands over it, looking for a latch or a weak spot but found nothing but a smooth surface. It was just as solid as the door to their small cell had been. She turned around again and surveyed this new room.

It was much larger and much brighter. The walls, ceiling and floor were all pristine white with no discernable light sources despite the brightness. She squinted against it, having gotten so used to the dim conditions in their cell and out in the hallway. The stark whiteness of the walls, ceiling and floor also made everything shine in a blinding manner. She was having a difficult time making out the details of the room but she saw a long table in the center of the room with straps hanging off the sides. She swallowed nervously at the sight of it. Next to it sat a smaller table with nothing on the surface but, with a sinking feeling, Rose realized she could quite easily picture an array of surgical tools laid out on top of it.

She remembered what the Doctor had told her about these aliens. How they were ruthless and uncaring and concerned only with their own selfish endeavors. She recalled what he'd said about being placed in museums and how it was better than the alternative, of being cut up and used for spare parts and research. Her heart thudded quicker as she noticed this room was definitely not exuding a "museum" vibe. Spare parts and research though? Oh yeah.

Rose waited in that room for what seemed like ages. She closed her eyes and tried to fight the panic that was scrambling up her throat. Tears were already prickling at the backs of her eyes and she took deep breaths, trying to calm herself. She needed to keep her wits about her or she'd never find a way out of this. And she had to get out of this, had to get back to the Doctor. Oh, Doctor... she'd just gotten him back in her life and he was finally willing to open up to her and now this...

She tried to swallow the wail that rose through her unbidden, but the desperate noise fought its way out regardless. It echoed off the stark walls of the room before she could stop it. She gasped, trying desperately to find her calm.

The door swung open and a line of Minusians entered. Some were dressed in the guards' uniform, others wore long, white lab coats over white one-piece suits that reminded her of hazmat suits back on Earth. They also wore thick utility boots and partial face masks to complete their unwelcoming appearance and she suspected these were the scientists she'd heard about. They were the ones come to cut her open, tear her apart. She tried to keep a defiant expression on her face, not wanting to give them the satisfaction of her fear.

They were speaking to one another but she couldn't make out what they were saying over the blood rushing in her ears. They weren't talking to her at all, treating her as though she were an animal. Lower than an animal. A thing. She had backed against the smooth wall unconsciously and now the guards stepped forward, one grabbing each of her arms. They began to pull her towards the table with the straps. She saw one of the scientists placing a tray of instruments on the small table, just as she had so easily envisioned. She began to thrash, adrenaline taking over. She screamed and cried out, not even making coherent sense to her own ears any longer.

"Remove your clothing," one of the scientists said to her as he pulled on a pair of elbow length rubber gloves.

"What? No!" she said, pulling against her captors grip even more.

"You'll do it or we'll do it for you," he warned her, fixing her with a hard, appraising look.

"Eat. Shit," she spat. The scientist merely raised an eyebrow at her and then gestured to the guards.

Rose continued to glare defiantly as her shirt was yanked off and her jeans removed. One of the guards attempted to lift her leg to pull the jeans the rest of the way off and she used the opportunity to kick at him, just narrowly missing what passed for a nose. She continued to struggle violently, now clad only in her bra and knickers as they lifted her up and slammed her down onto the table. Pain shot through her back but it only fueled her fury as she kicked and punched for all she was worth. She was not going to go down without a fight.

Her limbs were grabbed each in turn and strapped down to the table. She knew she was running rapidly out of opportunities to fight back. They were trying to grab her left arm when she threw out another punch, connecting satisfyingly with one of the guards jaws. In the next moment her wrist was forced down, snapping against the edge of the table. The cracking of her bones resounded through the room and she cried out in agony.

"Be careful!" reprimanded one of the scientists to one of the guards. "Look what you've done; you've broken its wrist! It'll be worth more with less damage." The scientist turned to his assistant. "Sedate her already!" She felt a cool sting at her neck before her limbs involuntarily relaxed, her vision fogged and she let the darkness claim her.

The Doctor had kept his head, amazingly. He'd been beating against the door in anguish when the idea occurred to him that he could use this to get him out of the cell. If he could get out of the cell, then he could help Rose. It hadn't taken long at all for the guards to yank his door open again. He'd suspected they were keeping an eye on him and this confirmed it. They didn't want him to bruise or cut his skin, or to break any bones.

The guards had ordered him to stop. He'd told them that he wouldn't stop, that he would keep on doing that and worse until they allowed him to see who was in charge. He'd suspected it would be the Prime Minister, if he remembered Minusian politics correctly. He ended up being right and he'd been brought before the Prime Minister without much delay. That told him something. That told him that the Minusians were very interested in keeping him calm. It wasn't surprising, considering he was the last Gallifreyan in the universe. He would be quite a catch for their little museum.

They brought him to a spacious and ornately decorated room. The Minusians had a fondness for artwork and decoration as long as it was rare. They never seemed, however, to stop and consider that some artwork was rare because no one ever wanted it. Beauty seemed to be a concept that they had a difficulty fully grasping.

The Prime Minister was even less attractive than guards had been. And that was saying something. The Minusians were humanoid, with mostly human looking bodies and features. Their eyes were beady, their hair sparse and oily looking and their limbs were gangly and disjointed looking. But the PM definitely looked worse than the sampling he'd seen so far. The Doctor wondered at it until he saw the man cough discreetly into a handkerchief. Then he saw it, the swollen eyes, the raised sores, the greyish tinge to his skin... The Prime Minister had the flu. Not a terribly big deal to humans, but to the Minusians, it was often deadly.

"Sir, I hope you don't mind me speaking out of turn," the Doctor began, trying for respectful formality. He would grease more wheels by being pleasant, he knew, even though he wanted to rant and rage at every one of these cruel monsters. "I've noticed you seem to be suffering. Have you been ill long?"

The Prime Minister, who went by the name of Zogg, scowled and glanced at his advisors. "Is this our new specimen? The last Gallifreyan?"

His most immediate advisor nodded.

"I'm the Doctor," said the Doctor with an awkward smile.

Prime Minister Zogg sneezed before he could cover his bulbous nose with his handkerchief, spraying spittle everywhere. "Very well, eh, Doctor. Yes, I just fell ill yesterday." He sniffed. "I have my best scientists on the case."

The Doctor hesitantly lowered his arm that had served as a shield against the spray. "But I bet they haven't found a cure for you yet, have they?" he said, trying to sound as sympathetic as he could.

Zogg peered at him closely. "What are you getting at?"

He cleared his throat. "I have a cure for the disease you're suffering from. Or rather, I can synthesize the cure for you. I have all the necessary components on board my ship, I could prepare it for you quite easily," he explained.

"Are you a scientist as well as a doctor?" Zogg asked, visibly perking up. The Doctor could almost see the wheels turning in this man's mind, thinking that maybe he would draft him into his team of scientists as well as display him in the museum. He fought back an instinctual shudder.

"Er... Yes, I am. Very clever. I would be happy to help you on the road to a speedy recovery," he told the man. "That is, in return for a few simple requests."

The alien's eyebrow shot up. "What would you ask for your services?"

"Let my friend go. I know she was sent to be dissected. Please, I'm asking you to let both of us go. If I have your word, I will be more than happy to prepare you a cure," he said.

Zogg scoffed. "And give you up? The last Gallifreyan? Why in the galaxy would I want to do that?"

"Because," he replied, playing his card and praying it worked, "you'll die otherwise. You know this to be true, you've seen this illness and what it can do to your people."

He hesitated, considering the Doctor's words. Truth be told, he considered far longer than others would have in his situation. It told the Doctor of how very much they wanted to keep him.

"Fine," he finally relented, sounding exasperated and he wheezed into his handkerchief. "I must be a fool for agreeing to this, but I see no other way."

The Doctor nodded and tried to fight the urge to breath a sigh of relief. There'd be plenty of time for relief later, when he had Rose back safe on board the TARDIS. "I'm glad you are able to see reason," he said.

Zogg looked skeptical. "How shall we arrange this trade?"

"Give Rose to me, safe. Once I have her safe on my ship, I will deliver the cure to you," the Doctor replied.

"And how do I know you will deliver this cure to me?" Zogg asked.

He thought quickly. "Let me go to my ship, I will prepare and bring you the cure. When you release Rose to me, I shall let you have the cure."

"How do I know you won't just leave the planet as soon as you return to your ship?" the alien wanted to know.

"You don't," the Doctor said. "You have to trust me. But listen to me when I say this: I will never leave this ship without Rose. I could never leave her behind. That is as solemn a vow as I can give you."

"Are you defective? I did not know Gallifreyans to be so sentimental towards a lesser species." He paused to cough into his handkerchief. His coughs wracked violently through his body. Sniffling and groaning once it was over, he swore to himself.

The Doctor cringed. It didn't take long for the virus to render a Minusian so decrepitly ill. "Please, Prime Minister. You need the cure."

"Yes, I need that cure. I do not understand why you value the human. It is in no way as remarkable of a specimen as you are. But, no matter. The human is expendable, we can harvest more. I demand the cure, now." Zogg shivered, likely from his rapidly rising fever.

The Doctor hated feeling triumphant in the face of such suffering, but Rose's life was at stake. He leaned forward, his own face inches from the Prime Minister, ignoring the leaking orifices as best he could. "That is where you are very wrong. Rose is remarkable in every way."

The alien waved him away, now impatient. "Go, go to your ship and retrieve this cure for me. When you have returned, we will return this human girl to you."

"You must promise me, Prime Minister, that she will not be harmed," he said, his tone threatening. The other man nodded and then waved to one of his guards.

"Go tell them to halt the dissection," he directed and the guard ran off down the corridor. The Doctor felt his hearts skip a beat or two painfully as he considered how close he may have just come to losing Rose altogether. "These men here will take you to your ship. Don't delay."

He nodded and left with another pair of guards. They took him to a nearby shuttle which flew them to the not-so-abandoned spacecraft where the TARDIS had been left. As the Doctor set to work assembling the flu cure that had been discovered in the 31st century, he kept his mind on his task and on the hope of having a safe and sound Rose in his arms sooner rather than later.

Rose was conscious. At least, she thought she was conscious. She could hear the murmuring of the scientists, she could even see the stark whiteness of the ceiling over her head and the occasional alien head bob in and out of her view. She could feel something cool tracing along her midsection and torso, almost like water traced on her flesh. She was still strapped down, still felt the sickening throbbing in her left wrist. She was aware of everything that was going on. But she could not control her body. She could not even control her own muscles enough to blink or turn her head. Her mind was fogged against the panic she'd felt but she could still taste the sharp edges of it, threatening to press back in and will her back to life.

"Let's start here, with the pancreas," one of the scientists was saying. She could just see one of them picking up a sharp looking implement. It had just been pressed to her side, the bite of it cutting through her mental fog, when the door suddenly swung open.

"Stop the dissection," the newcomer called out. The scalpel was lifted and she heard the buzz of the scientist's voices. If she could have sobbed in relief, she would have.

"What is the meaning of this?" one of the aliens at her head asked in an authoritative tone.

"Orders from the Prime Minister. An exchange for its release has been bartered. The human specimen is to be kept whole and alive," the voice replied.

This time there were disappointed grumbles all around her.

"What happened to its clothes? We can't bring her before the Prime Minister in this state of undress!"

"They got torn. We'll give it a gown to wear to hide its repulsive anatomy from the Prime Minister. That should be sufficient."

"When will this sedative wear off? It needs to be able to stand upright."

"Not for another half an hour at the least. We can give it this stimulant to speed the process."

"Is that advisable?"

"Does it matter?"

Rose heard the discussions around her as if she were only an observer, not as if they were in any way about her. She still felt so oddly disconnected. Most of all, however, she felt crashing relief. She wouldn't be dying, not today. She didn't know how, but she knew the Doctor was responsible for this. Somehow or other, he had found a way to save her.

She felt hands grabbing her shoulders, pulling her up. She might have felt dizzy from the disorienting sensation if she could at all feel her head connected to her body. Something cool pressed to her neck again and she felt a burning course through her, down her arms and across her chest and down her legs. She cried out at the painful sensation as her nerves were shocked back to life.

The hands continued to pull her up to her feet. She was surprised her legs supported her at all. As she looked down at her legs, she noticed lines drawn across her nude form. Lines indicating where to cut. There was a bleeding incision on her side, where they'd just begun. They were going to cut her open with her still alive. Dear God. She was then wrapped in a plain white gown, not unlike what she expected she would have been given at a normal Earth hospital.

Rose felt vaguely ill as she was strong armed out the door of the horrible white room. Her hair hung limply in her face, her feet shuffled as she tried to keep up with the strides of the guards who held her up by the arms on either side. She was having a hard time focusing her eyes so she kept them closed as much as she could. One thought repeated in her mind, over and over and over again. Leave with the Doctor. Leave with the Doctor.

She was pushed into a large room. She cringed, not even knowing why she was doing it. The room was just so large and bright and open and filled with these aliens that she had come to hate so much in such a short amount of time. She was scared. Her heart was pounding in her chest, threatening to fall out of rhythm and stop beating altogether. Where was the Doctor?

Just then, a familiar noise sounded, echoing around the large chamber. It was a sound that brought tears of relief to her eyes. She blinked her eyes open as she saw the TARDIS materialize just ten feet away from where she stood. Her knees buckled automatically and the guards who still had hold of her arms yanked her back to her feet.

The doors opened and out stepped the Doctor, holding a small box. He looked quickly around the room and saw her. He looked at once relieved and horrified as his eyes took in her state. She knew she must look a wreck but she couldn't even bring herself to care. She was just so glad to see him again. She had really thought that she wouldn't.

A plump and rather sickly looking alien stepped forward to greet the Doctor. He had red, weepy eyes, a runny nose and pallid grey coloring. "I see you have honored our agreement and have returned. Do you have the cure?"

The Doctor tore his eyes from her with some difficulty and looked at the other man. "I do, Zogg," he said, holding out the box. Zogg accepted it greedily, opening it to check the contents.

"You need to take the first dose right away," explained the Doctor. "That should start to clear up the worst of your symptoms. Try to stay in bed a few days, take another dose tomorrow and the last one the day after that. You'll be right as rain by the time the week is out."

Zogg nodded at him, looking satisfied. "You have pleased me, Doctor," he said, his voice wheezing. "As you can see, I have brought your Rose out. It is unharmed." He gestured to her then and she shivered unconsciously away from his appraising look.

"Thank you," the Doctor murmured, returning his eyes to her. He looked very tense, as if he was trying to control the play of emotions on his face. "May I take her now? Can we leave?"

The Prime Minister narrowed his watery eyes at the Doctor. "Release the human female," he rasped at the guards.

The Doctor strode forward and the guards released her at last. She stumbled a little and the Doctor easily scooped her into his arms, one arm under her knees and the other supporting her back. "Easy. I've got you."

Rose's head rolled and came to a rest against his shoulder. She felt safe here, at last. In his arms.

Prime Minister Zogg cleared his throat, which brought on another series of coughs. Before you leave, I will take the first dose. You will wait until I am satisfied that you haven't tricked me, and then I will... let you leave."

The Doctor sighed, but waved him on. "Very well, Prime Minister."

Zogg sniffed and gestured for the guards to raise their weapons on the Doctor and Rose. Once they did, Zogg opened the box and removed the first in the series of phials. He gave the Doctor a cautious glance, then drank the medicine in one gulp. After several tense minutes passed, Zogg looked thoughtful. "I believe my fever is reducing."

His advisor leaned in. "Very good, sir."

Zogg handed the box to his advisor and scowled. He clenched and unclenched his spindly fingers, huffing as he paced for a few minutes. At last, he threw out a hand. "Let them go."

With this command, the guards lowered their weapons.

Rose worried that Zogg would have second thoughts and clearly the Doctor shared her concerns. With a curt nod to the aliens gathered, he walked back to the TARDIS with her in his arms, kicking the door closed behind him. He strode silently up the ramp, settling her down on the jump seat before flipping the lever and sending them into the Vortex.

Safe. At last.

Rose sighed audibly in relief and he turned to look at her. "Are you okay?" he asked, his brow furrowed.

She nodded weakly. "Yes, I'm fine." It wasn't entirely true, she knew she had at least a broken wrist that should be tended to. But they'd just escaped, just barely escaped and she knew he was likely coursing with adrenaline. He would blame himself and she couldn't do that to him. Not until he had a chance to settle down and regain his perspective.

He stepped up to her and swept her into his arms, hugging her close. She ached nearly from head to toe but she was so glad to be held by him that she couldn't find it in her to complain. He tucked his face into the curve of her shoulder and she felt his breath against her neck, quick and cool. He was shaking and she found that she was too.

He pulled back and looked at her. His eyes were so wide and she could see his fear written plainly there. "I almost lost you," he gasped.

"You didn't," she said, stroking the side of his face, hoping to calm him. He was barely holding on, she could tell.

"Rose," he said, his voice breaking. He clutched her tighter, closer. "I love you. I love you so much and I almost never had a chance to tell you."

Tears fell down her cheeks before she even knew she was crying. "Oh, Doctor, I love you too. I've loved you for so long. We're okay now," she promised him.

He stared at her for one long, amazing moment before his mouth came crashing down on hers and then she was clutching him just as tight and close as he was her. She heard a muffled whimper and realized that she made the noise as his tongue plunged into her mouth, stroking along her teeth, teasing at the roof of her mouth. She pushed back with her tongue and then it was his turn to groan, the noise going straight to her core and heating her all the way through.

She strained against him, arching her back and pressing her breasts into his solid chest, He nipped at her lower lip and then brushed his tongue over the bite. Stars swam behind her eyes and she brushed her right hand down his back and over his frankly amazing bum. In reply, he pressed his hips forward against her and she felt the undeniable evidence of his arousal against her belly. She moved her hand down in between them to press at the front of his trousers and was rewarded with a sharp buck of his hips and another groan.

He swung her around, pressing her back against the console. She was ready to wrap her legs around his waist and let this incredible snog they were sharing progress into some incredible shagging. But he pressed forward and her side made contact against the console, the side with the unhealed incision. This time, she couldn't stifle the gasp of pain she made.

He pulled away, looking alarmed. "Rose? What- ?" he began and then broke off when he saw her wrist, already bruised and swollen. "Your wrist! Why didn't you tell me!"

"I... I was going to. I didn't want you to..." she trailed off, unsure how to finish that sentence. She didn't think he would respond well to her thinking he couldn't handle the stress of her injuries, even if it was true.

His face hardened as he lightly ran his fingers along the broken joint. "They said they hadn't harmed you," he growled.

"It's nothing much," she protested, sounding weaker to her own ears than she would have preferred. "I'm alive, isn't that good enough?"

He shoved away from her, jamming a hand through his hair. "They lied to me," he said, his voice frosty. "I should go back there and-"

"Doctor," she said, sharply. Her heart was caught in her throat. This was exactly what she wanted to avoid. "You can't. Please... please don't."

"They hurt you! They are a cruel race and they deserve to be punished for what they've done to you, what they've done to countless others!" he exclaimed.

She was caught in a wave of fear, fear for him and fear for what had happened to her and fear for what this could mean for them. Everything that had happened that day, the things that neither of them had any control over, all came rushing over her in one, cruel wave and she felt overwhelmed. She wanted to help him but she suddenly realized that she was struggling to help herself.

"I'm sorry," she gasped, choking back tears. "I'm sorry, I need to go take a shower."

She turned and rushed out of the console room before he could say another word.

 **Chapter 12**

Chapter Summary

The Doctor helps Rose recover from her ordeal with the Minusians.

This is the penultimate chapter, folks. There will be an epilogue in the next couple of days. That means that, yes, there is smut in this chapter. Avert your eyes if you are against that sort of thing.

I gotta give the love to foxmoon for agreeing to beta this monster of a thing . I think she'll think twice before offering to do that again anytime soon. ;)

"Stupid!" the Doctor barked. "Stupid, stupid, stupid!" He charged through the TARDIS corridors, trying to find where Rose had gone after she'd run from the console room. Obviously, she'd said she was going for a shower but so far he'd been unable to find that shower. He didn't think the TARDIS was hiding her from him, but rather that he was doing an exceedingly poor job of concentrating on finding her. Because he was far too busy telling himself how stupid he was. And he was worried about her. So worried.

Clearly, she'd been through something traumatic that day. He didn't even know the half of what she'd seen and what had done to her and even thinking about it turned his stomach. And instead of helping her to deal with it, he'd added to her stress and anguish by selfishly piling his own issues on top of hers. Stupid. In fact, stupid was probably too mild a word for it.

Finally, he was able to focus and he located her bedroom fairly easily. It was in the same place it always was, after all, and he noticed that his own room was just across the hall. That was new. Normally, his room was hidden deep in the bowels of the TARDIS. She must have moved it for him. He didn't want to take the time to ponder the significance of that just now. He knocked lightly on her door and there was no answer. He pushed the door open carefully, peeking his head inside. She wasn't in the room, which didn't surprise him. He could hear noises coming from the adjoining en suite. Easing into her room, he listened and heard the distinctive sounds of crying. His hearts twisted in his chest.

He didn't stop to think about what was right or what was wrong. All he knew was that she was crying and she needed him to be strong for her. He stepped into the en suite, seeing the silhouette of her form behind the shower door, the soft sound of her crying rising over the sound of the pouring water.

"Rose," he said, just loud enough for her to hear. He didn't want to startle her, wanted her to know that he was present.

There was a sniffle. "Doctor?"

He crossed to the shower and pulled the door open. Through the steam, he could just see her and... His jaw fell open. She had a myriad of small bruises along her arms, supposedly from where the guards had grabbed her. She was holding her left wrist carefully by her side, obviously trying to avoid jarring it. There was a painful looking cut on her side, and he realized with a sinking feeling that it was an incision the aliens had made on her. It wasn't long, but it looked deep and painful. The worst, however, was the markings. There were lines drawn across her torso and abdomen, lines to indicate where to cut. She'd apparently been trying to scrub them off, judging from the washcloth in her hand.

His face fell and he could feel the tears welling up in his own eyes. Quickly, he shed his jacket and kicked off his trainers. He reached down to yank off his socks and tossed them the way of his jacket. He loosened his tie and pulled it over his head, tossing it aside as well. He unbuttoned his oxford as quickly as he could before removing that and letting it fall to the floor. He stepped into the shower then, only removing his vest as an afterthought and tossing the now sodden garment out before closing the shower door after him. He still wore his trousers but didn't care as the water from the shower quickly soaked him. The only thing on his mind right then was wrapping Rose in his arms and holding her.

She was warm in his embrace. He was trying not to think about the fact that he was only wearing trousers and she was wearing nothing at all. When he'd first seen her, he'd been distracted by the horrible markings marring her skin. But now, he could feel her soft curves against him and he was reminded very much of the intimacy of holding her like this. He swallowed and fought against the stirrings of arousal.

She curled into his chest, her tears falling anew as he held her, stroking her hair and making soft shushing sounds. "It's okay, Rose," he murmured. "I'm here. I'm so sorry. I'm here."

"I didn't want you to... see," she sobbed, clutching at his back with her good hand and trying to burrow even closer into his embrace. He tightened his arms before releasing her and stepping back to look at the markings again.

"Why, Rose?" he asked, unable to fathom her shame. He plucked the washcloth from her fingers and turning around, located a bottle of shower wash on the shelf behind him. He squirted a small amount of the gel onto the washcloth and rubbed the nubby fabric making a nice lather. Then, he carefully began to scrub at the markings on her body, erasing them for her.

"I knew you'd be upset," she admitted, relaxing slowly under his touch as he washed away the traces of those horrible lines. "I thought I could get them washed off before you saw."

He grimaced, concentrating on washing off a spot near her belly button. "I don't ever want you to feel you have to hide something from me, Rose," he told her. "I want us to be able to share with each other."

"And you'll do that too? Tell me things?" she asked. He looked up from where he knelt before her and saw the doubtful look on her face. He smiled.

"I will, Rose. I will do my best. You have my permission to call me on it if you catch me hiding," he assured her. She smiled back.

He turned his attention back to her stomach and he was trying to focus on the job at hand and not on the curve of her flesh, the flare of her hips and the soft, rounded flesh of her breasts. He breathed in and then immediately regretted it as his senses were full of her scent. He took a moment to collect himself before getting back up to his feet.

He scrubbed gently at some markings on the top of her breasts but he was no longer focused on his task. Arousal was coursing through him now and he was powerless to halt it. He swallowed and chanced a look in her eyes. Her whiskey eyes were darkened, watching his. Her tongue darted out to lick at her lips and he felt the blood instantly rush from his head. He wanted badly to lean forward and kiss her. He wanted to kiss her and touch her and taste her and take things where he knew they were definitely headed now.

Reason charged through the fog in his head, however, and reminded him of her injuries. Carefully, he reached down and took ahold of her left forearm. He brought it up so he could look again at her broken wrist. He could fix this. He could fix all of her aches and pains. And right now, he told himself, that should be his priority more than anything else.

"I'd like to get you to the medbay," he said softly, brushing his thumb gently over the bruising on her wrist. "Get you all patched back up."

She nodded. "Okay."

He released her and she turned to shut off the flow of the water. He stepped out of the shower, grabbing a fluffy white towel from the shelf for Rose and passing it to her before taking one for himself. His trousers were dripping and he knew he needed to get out of them.

"I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere," he instructed.

He hurried across the corridor to his own room where he quickly removed his sopping trousers and stepped into a soft pair of flannel pyjama pants instead. He found a dressing gown in his wardrobe and and slipped it on. He ran a hand absently through his hair, causing the strands to stand on end as always and then he returned to Rose's room. She was wearing a dressing gown now too, her damp hair hanging in tendrils around her shoulders. He smiled at her and gestured for him to follow her down the corridor.

The medbay wasn't far and he entered the room and instantly set to looking for the instruments, ointments and tools he would need to set his Rose to right again. He turned to beckon her to sit on the exam chair and was startled to find her clinging to the doorway, her face ashen in color.

"Rose! What's the matter?" he asked, crossing the room quickly to her side. She looked terrified.

She shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. "I- I can't go in there," she said, her voice quavering. "It looks like... It reminds me of that room. Please, I'm sorry. I can't go in there."

He cringed. He hadn't been thinking, he should have anticipated this. "Of course not, Rose. Here, why don't we go to my room. I can fix you up there."

She nodded and let him lead her to his room. He realised as he walked into his room, that she'd never been there before. He'd always hidden his room from everyone, even Rose. Now, he was almost excited to share this room with her. It was a huge step for him, for them.

Rose was gazing around the room with undisguised interest and he felt suddenly shy. "Why don't you lie down on the bed, I'll go get the supplies," he suggested. She nodded and smiled at him. He returned the grin and hurried back to the medbay.

He could do this, he realised. He could fix her injuries and he could repair her body. It made him feel proactive, useful, heroic even. He loved to feel heroic. All of this rushing around would distract him from the reality of whatever emotional injuries she might have, which he felt distinctly less capable of healing. All he could do about that, really, was hold her and promise her that he would always be there. It would have to be enough. He hoped it would be.

He returned to his room and paused in the doorway. She was lying on his bed, on top of the duvet and her head rested on his pillow. She still wore her dressing gown and she smiled shyly at him. He smiled back and crossed quickly to his wardrobe where he retrieved a t-shirt of his and a pair of his boxer briefs for her to put on when he was finished with her injuries. He thrilled, briefly, at the thought of her in his clothes. It was a strange, possessive emotion and he found he rather hoped to indulge it later.

He sat on the edge of the bed and quietly began to tend to her. He maintained a fairly steady sense of professional detachment, he thought, as he repaired her wrist, used the sonic on some of the worst of her bruises and especially when he parted her dressing gown so that he could use the dermal regenerator on the incision in her side. He barely noticed the smoothness of her skin or the gentle line of her curves. He worked in silence and Rose didn't speak either, just leaned her head back on the pillow. At times, she closed her eyes and he could tell certain things he was doing were caused her some pain but she tried to hide it. Would they ever stop trying to protect one another? He rather hoped not.

By the time he was finished, he noticed the way her eyelids had grown heavy. She was clearly exhausted. He brushed her hair from her forehead and planted a kiss there. "Sleep," he told her, before drawing back. He started to stand up when she grabbed for his hand.

"Stay with me?" she asked, her eyes so hopeful he knew he couldn't deny her even if he wanted to.

He nodded and swallowed thickly. He handed her the t-shirt and pants and watched as she took them and disappeared into his en suite to get ready for bed. Knowing his TARDIS, he imagined she had materialised a toothbrush and everything for her in there. He removed his dressing gown and draped it over the chair next to the bed. He pulled back the duvet and climbed into the bed, lying next to where Rose had been laying before. He waited for her, reminding himself that this was just sleep. He was going to lie with her tonight because she didn't want to be alone. That was all. He probably wouldn't even sleep. In fact, it'd be better if he didn't sleep. He wasn't sure what his subconscious mind would come up with should he slip into dreams tonight.

Rose returned in a moment and his mouth went dry. He'd enjoyed the idea of her wearing his clothes. The reality of it was something else altogether. His t-shirt hung loosely on her, gaping at her shoulders and brushing the tops of her legs. He could see his boxer briefs peeking out from under the shirt. She shifted self-consciously and gave him a tentative smile. He grinned back, pulling the duvet aside and patting the bed next to him.

She climbed in and then turned to her side, her back facing him. "Is this okay?" she asked quietly. He covered her back up with the duvet and wiggled closer to her, wrapping an arm around her mid-section and pulling her back to his chest.

"I wouldn't want to be anywhere else right now, Rose," he told her truthfully. He buried his nose in her hair, inhaling the scent of her and the shower wash she'd used. The strands were drying now, and very soft.

Everything about her was soft, and warm. He closed his eyes, surprised to find that he was more tired than he'd thought. Maybe he'd just doze for a minute or two, knock the edge off. He listened to her breathing even out, becoming steady as she drifted off to sleep. He realized, dimly before sleep claimed him as well, that he wanted to hold her like this every night for the rest of her life.

Rose awoke slowly, feeling slightly disoriented. The first thing she noticed was that she was on board the TARDIS. She heard the familiar hum and it settled her like no other noise could. The next thing she noticed was how warm and safe and comfortable she felt. She felt arms around her, a breath on her neck. As she came more awake, she also became more aware of the long line of the Doctor laying behind her, snuggled closely to her. She shifted a little and then she felt something else.

Oh. That... that was new. She'd noticed, of course, in the last several days with the Doctor that he was more than capable of arousal. She'd felt the hard evidence certainly the last time they'd kissed in the control room. Here now, pressed to her back, she again felt the undeniable proof of that arousal. He may be an alien, but in this one very important way, he was all man.

And, like a man, he was still asleep. At least, she was fairly sure he was. His arm was still slung limply around her, his breath still tickling the hairs at the back of her neck. He was still, but relaxed. Well, most of him was.

She wiggled a little, wanting to test his reaction. She was rewarded with a muffled growl and she felt him press forward against her. She smiled into her pillow and arched her back just enough to angle her hips just... so. The Doctor moved his arm, grabbing at her hip with his hand. His breath had stilled. Yes, he was definitely awake now.

She ran her fingers over his, lightly and teasingly. Then she reached back, stroking from his hip down his leg as far as she could reach. He groaned in her ear.

"Minx," he murmured. "Be careful that you don't start anything you don't intend to finish."

She turned in his arms then and faced him. His hair was adorably rumpled from sleep, his eyes still drowsy but shining, a self-assured smirk on his lips. She quirked an eyebrow at him. "I definitely intend for you to finish, Doctor."

Using just her fingertips, she stroked across his chest, now exposed to her. Well, she'd seen it in the shower earlier but to her credit she'd had other things on her mind. Now though, this chest was hers and she was delighting in exploring it, in learning the little things that made him gasp and sigh. He reached up with his other hand to cup the back of her head, his fingers idly playing with her hair. Her hand dipped lower, feeling across the smoothness of his stomach and enjoying the way his muscles contracted under her touch. She grinned and he gazed at her with a look akin to wonder. He moved his other hand from her hip and began caressing down her back.

Feeling bolder, she traced her fingers across the waistband of his pyjama pants. He sucked in a breath, tangling his fingers even tighter in her hair. She chuckled and he ran his hand from her back, lower and down over the borrowed pants she was wearing, learning the curve of her bum. He seemed to enjoy paying particular attention to the crease at the top of her thigh. She wiggled into his touch, hoping to encourage him.

The Doctor grinned down at her. Then he dipped his head and kissed her lips lightly before drawing back again. "How are you feeling?" he asked, still stroking his fingers gently.

"Much better," she told him. "Almost good as new. Thanks to you." She dipped a finger underneath the back of his waistband, feeling the softness of the skin there.

"Rose," he said, his voice low and deep. "I almost lost you. You have no idea how much that scared me."

She lifted her other hand from between them and stroked his face. "You didn't lose me. I'm right here," she reassured him. She leaned up, pressing kisses all over his face; on his eyelids, over his freckles, at the corners of his mouth, on his chin...

Suddenly, he grabbed her by the shoulders and rolled them together, pulling her underneath him. He reached down and grabbed the hem of the t-shirt she was wearing and yanked it up over her head, throwing it back over his shoulder. His eyes traveled slowly down her form and she fought back a blush. She knew he'd seen her in the shower, he'd washed those horrible markings off of her after all, but maybe it had been like it was for her. He'd had other things on his mind then. There didn't seem to be anything else on his mind now, though.

He swooped down, covering her lips with his, kissing her long and hard and with clear intent. Rose trembled as his tongue stroked in and out of her mouth, mimicking the subtle rocking of his hips against her. He cupped her jaw with one hand, holding her head as he kissed her breathless. He retreated and returned, stroked and nipped and sucked until she was writhing underneath him.

His other hand snaked between them, traveling down over her breasts, across her belly and down under the waistband of her borrowed pants, to the apex of her thighs. His long fingers stroked delicately at first, slowly growing more and more bold, touching her more and more deliberately. She broke away from his kiss, throwing her head back and gasping for air.

He chuckled as he kissed down her throat, nipping at the sensitive skin at the base. "You smell incredible right here," he told her between kisses. "Right here." The Doctor licked at the hollow and nibbled at her collarbone. "And you feel amazing. Right here," he continued, stroking across her folds and flicking at her clit with his thumb.

She bit back a groan as the sensation tore through her. She heard him tsk at her. "Don't hold back your noises, Rose," he instructed, lowering his head further and kissing across her breast, blowing a cool breath across her nipple. "I want to hear you. I want to hear what I'm doing to you."

He continued his exploration of her breasts and she struggled to maintain a coherent train of thought. "Of course," she gasped, "Of course you talk in bed. I should have known."

He chuckled again, a darker sound this time. Two of his digits slipped inside her and she gasped, arching her back off the mattress. "You are so wet," he groaned, kissing the valley between her breasts. "You are so wet for me. That is just... that is brilliant."

"Doctor," Rose moaned, pleading. "Please..." He was tormenting her. It was delicious, amazing torment, but it was still torment.

He withdrew his fingers and moved down her body swiftly, dropping hurried kisses on his way. He hooked his thumbs in the waistband of her pants and pulled them down and off, tossing them the way of the t-shirt from before.

He pushed apart her knees gently, his eyes focused on his target. He licked his lips and she might have moaned just from that sight alone. She felt like her body was a taut wire, waiting to be plucked by him. She'd imagined this so many times since she first met him, since he wore leather and had blue eyes that she could scarcely believe that it was actually happening.

He leaned forward, nuzzling her folds, running his tongue along her opening. He lifted his head, licking his lips. "Gorgeous," he breathed. "You taste like nothing else... this..." He paused, ducking his head back down to take another sample, this time, his tongue entering her and she arched off the bed again, instinctively grabbing at his hair. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do this to you."

After that, things became a little muddled. Sensation ripped through her as the Doctor played her like a fine instrument. His sideburns rubbed deliciously on the sensitive skin of her inner thighs, just like she'd fantasised for so long. He used his fingers and his tongue in a way that told her he'd had considerable practice doing this in the past. Amazingly, instead of feeling jealous she felt an overwhelming surge of gratitude for anyone who had given him experience doing this. He was a natural.

He pressed his thumb just there, and he stroked her with his tongue there and then she was coming apart with the most mind-blowing orgasm she'd ever experienced. A supernova exploded behind her eyes and every muscle in her body went taut as she made sounds she knew she'd never made before. She couldn't even control it; the sounds she made, the way the waves were crashing over and over and over and the way she arched so far off the bed that she was dimly aware of knocking him back. She grabbed at the duvet and pulled as she felt him press a cool hand to her hip, easing her back to the bed while his other hand stroked her slowly, gently settling her raw nerves.

"Oh, God," she gasped when she found her breath again. She pushed her hair out of her eyes and looked down at him. He was grinning at her filthily.

"Nope, just the Doctor," he quipped. He ducked his head as she chucked a pillow at him. Then he crawled back up her body and kissed her deeply. She could taste herself mingled with that taste that was uniquely him and it was such a heady, erotic thing that she moaned into his mouth. She reached down impulsively, pushing at the waistband of his pyjama pants. She pushed them down as far as she could, using her feet to nudge them the rest of way off until they dropped to the floor at the foot of the bed. His pants taken care of, she reached between them and took his length in her hand. He felt amazing, so hard and so much warmer than the rest of him and also unspeakably soft. "Rose," he moaned, "your hand... oh..." She found her mouth watering as she felt him and as she listened to his groans.

She pushed at his shoulders, trying to reverse their positions. He clearly could see what her intent was and kissed her quickly. "Later," he growled. "Definitely later. Right now... I want... I have to be inside you."

The Doctor peppered her with kisses; along her neck, underneath her ear, along her jaw. Then his mouth was on hers and his tongue was plunging. She could feel his muscles straining under her hands as she gripped his shoulders and back. "Please, Rose," he groaned. "Please let me."

His desperation and his words were setting her skin on fire with want. "Yes, Doctor," she panted. "Please!"

He nudged her thighs apart with his knee and settled between her legs. He had a hold of himself and she was holding her breath, waiting. "Open your eyes," he commanded hoarsely.

She looked into his eyes and his expression was fathomless. His eyes were black with desire.

"Keep them open," he instructed. Then he pushed into her firmly, filling her, his eyes clouding slightly and his mouth hanging open. "Oh... Rose... fuck... you're so hot..." he gasped. "It's... brilliant. Oh, Rose... you... so tight... shiiiit."

His talking was driving her mad, the sound of his voice and the swearing and that dark tone that she'd never heard before was resonating deep within her. She was shaking with the sensations he was creating, from the tingling in her scalp down to the curling of her toes. He took a few deep strokes, hitting her deeper and deeper each time. She thought she might just fly apart right here and now, clutching at his back and crying out with each thrust.

She wrapped her legs around his back, enjoying the sensations the new angle provided. He apparently liked it too as his rhythm sped up and he began to bite off curses, unable to form entire thoughts anymore. She was so close... almost there... she just needed a little more...

"Please!" she cried. "Harder! More, Doctor!"

He was more than happy to oblige. He reached down and grabbed her right leg, hooking it over his forearm. He slammed into her now, hitting a spot within her that she hadn't even known existed until this moment. She began to make her own incoherent noises, but she thought she said something about Fuck and Doctor and Shit and Oh God. Then again, that could have been in her head. She was screaming in her head. Or maybe she was screaming out loud. She could no longer tell.

"Gonna... come," he grunted, his breath coming hard. She kept her eyes open, watched his face as they both raced towards completion together. He looked magnificent, like a god. He was hers and she felt humbled. She reached up and placed a hand on the side of his face. His eyes riveted to hers and then she was off, flying over the edge. She pulled him after and she heard him shout. After that, she was lost to sensation.

She surfaced a short while later, the Doctor's lean body resting on top of hers. She could feel the thudding of his hearts, the rapid rise and fall of his chest as he caught his breath. She could feel the sweat standing out on her brow, her hair plastered to her forehead. She took his head in her hands and pulled him to her for a brief kiss.

"That was... that was simply amazing," she breathed. He smiled weakly.

"I haven't done anything like that in... well, a very long time," he admitted breathlessly. "That was definitely worth the wait." She had a feeling he wasn't just referring to the wait since the last time he'd done this. She found she agreed wholeheartedly.

She grinned at him. "I'd say you definitely have the moves, Doctor," she said, remembering that night so long ago in a basement in war-torn London.

He rolled to the side and then pulled her so that she was resting her head on his chest. She sighed happily and wiggled against him. "This is what I've been trying to tell you," he murmured, sounding amused.

She giggled. "I should have listened sooner," she remarked, punctuating her sentence with a yawn.

"Yes, you should have," he agreed amiably. "Still feeling okay?" He stroked at her shoulder and arm slowly and tenderly.

"Yep," she replied quietly. "Feeling even better now, actually."

"Brilliant," he said and she could hear the grin in his voice. "I feel rather good myself.

"I'm glad," she murmured, stroking his chest and enjoying the rough texture of hair under her fingertips. "I love you."

He kissed the top of her head and pulled her closer. "I love you, too," he told her, his voice catching a little.

Warmth suffused her and she realised she hadn't felt this content in... well, maybe ever. She let her eyes slide closed and she drifted off to sleep, listening to the dual thudding of his hearts.

 **Chapter 13**

Chapter Summary

Here we are, the end of the story. We get a little look at what's going on with the Doctor and Rose and he has a nice surprise for her.

MAJOR thanks to foxmoon for her beta services on this. She did a fantastic job and really made this much better!

Stay tuned... I may be working on a sequel for this. ;) I'd like to get most if not all of it written before I post though so it may be a while!

One month later...

Rose was taking her sweet time getting around this morning, the Doctor noticed. She wasn't much of a morning person and he'd known this about her about as long as he'd known her. In fact, he was rather pressed to admit that it was one of her more endearing "faults". He'd grown even fonder of her crinkled brow, tousled hair, slurred speech and even her short temper in the month that had passed since they had embarked on this rather brilliant intimate relationship together.

Even when he didn't sleep at night, he would often return to his room, which now their room, and slip between the sheets, cuddling her close so that he could watch her as she woke. Some mornings, he urged the process along by planting little kisses along her neck or whispering in her ear. Other mornings, he was more patient and simply watched as her body slowly came to wakefulness. He didn't think he could have picked which version he preferred. In the end, it was just Rose and that was enough for him.

This morning, however, he had plans. He'd told her as much when he'd woken her a short while ago. She had grumbled at him as he had cheerfully directed her towards the en suite and turned the shower on for her. While she'd been in the shower, he'd set a steaming cup of tea on the bathroom counter where she'd see it when she was finished. He wanted today to be special and hoped to quickly erase any annoyance she might have at him waking her up before the day got underway.

This was why he was waiting as patiently as possible in the console room, rather than doing what he really wanted to do; hovering around her while she dressed and asking if she was ready yet. He had a basket, packed and ready, sitting on the jump seat, a folded blanket sitting on top of it. He bounced on the soles of his trainers and then paced a little. He hoped she would understand what he was trying to say with this trip today and not be upset by dredged up memories of the past.

He was still amazed at how lucky he was. Eight months after he'd made a series of the biggest mistakes he'd made in many, many years (and given how long he'd lived, he felt that was saying something), the universe had seen fit to reward him anyhow. He'd pushed Rose away, thinking he was doing the right thing for her and for them both and he'd been wrong. He'd been so wrong. Worse, he'd gone about it in the worst way possible. But she came back to him anyhow. She forgave him and she loved him regardless. It was... brilliant.

"So, Mr Big Fancy Time Lord, where are we headed today that you felt you had to wake me up so early?" a voice called, interrupting his thoughts.

He turned towards her, beaming already. She was wearing a pretty cornflower blue dress, casual and flirtatious, topped with a soft looking white cardigan with sleeves that came to her elbows. She wore sturdy but attractive plimsolls on her feet, and he knew that even though he'd told her there'd be no running today, she came prepared anyhow. He loved that about her. She'd pulled her hair up into a ponytail and her eyes sparkled with excitement despite her admonishing words.

"Rose," he began, "we're on the TARDIS. There's no such thing as 'early' when you're traveling through the Vortex."

She crossed the room to his side and gave him a light, playful smack on the arm. "You're too smug for your own good sometimes," she told him.

"You love my smugness," he said fondly. He tipped her chin up with his forefinger and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. He found that she was rather inclined to agree with him in the way she leaned into his kiss.

They landed a short while later and he buzzed with excitement as he rushed down the ramp to the doors. He opened the doors and then stepped back, gesturing her through ahead of him.

She stepped out onto the familiar green grass and looked around, her face dawning with wonder. "New Earth?" she asked, turning to stare at him.

He nodded and gestured out at the sparkling city across the water. "Yep. New New York. Again," he answered. He smiled at her and she smiled back, slowly.

"Why are we here?" she wanted to know. The little crease was starting to show between her eyebrows and he hoped to erase that line as soon as he could. He handed her the blanket while he hefted the basket.

"We're here for a picnic, Ms Tyler," he told her. He led the way across the slope to a small glade that was mostly out of the way of the flying cars overhead.

He helped her spread the blanket and they settled down on it. She sat just in front of him, settling back against his chest as they reclined. It was a sunnier day than the last time they came to New New York and the warmth seemed to make the apple grass around them even more fragrant.

"I shouldn't have brought Reinette to New Earth," he told her, finding it easier to talk about this without her looking in his eyes. They'd come a long way in the last month, but he still had some trouble with breaking down certain centuries-long-standing walls. It was a struggle and he was all too glad that Rose was willing to struggle alongside him. "That was a big mistake, one of many. I wanted to bring her someplace that I thought wouldn't alarm her too much but that would be new enough to excite her. I wanted to impress her."

He felt her sigh against him. "I know. And I knew it at the time. But I was still so jealous. I was hurt that you would bring her here," she admitted, sounding ashamed. "I was silly, I thought of this place as special to us and bringing her here... I thought it meant it wasn't as special to you as it was to me."

He tightened his arms around her and pressed a kiss into her hair. "Like I said. Big mistake. It was special to me. I felt so confused about you and about us. I thought there was no way you could feel the same way about me, as I did about you," he said. "I thought coming back here would accomplish two things: I thought it would impress Reinette and I thought it would make you happy. I didn't even think about how it might make you jealous because I didn't think you... wanted me."

"Daft alien," she scoffed. "You know how bad I want you." Her voice had gone lower and he could feel desire start to pump through his veins. She could turn him on with just a look, just a word.

"I do now," he murmured softly. "I didn't then. I was a fool."

"We should have talked to one another," she replied. It made so much sense when she said it, but he knew that at the time, talking to Rose about how he felt had been the last thing he'd wanted to do. Again, he marveled at how he'd gotten so lucky. He could have lost her forever.

"Rose," he said and he loosened his grip on her, turning her in his arms to face him. "I'm still so scared. I could have lost you so many times."

"But you didn't," she reassured him. She watched him closely, knowing that this was now a common refrain for them. He worried about losing her and she reassured him that she was here, safe in his arms. The best thing he could say is that it worked more times than it didn't.

"You left me and I thought I couldn't bear it," he said, remembering that horrible day when she had walked away and his hearts had broken. "You left because of what I did and what I didn't do. Then, I finally got you back and you were almost killed." He shook, remembering the Minusians and their warped sense of ideals and morality. He still wasn't sure he'd be able to resist acting out revenge on them. Rose held him back, he knew she didn't want him to add to his own feelings of guilt in the long run. But at the same time, he knew their practices must be stopped.

"Something like that could happen to either of us at any time though," she argued. "It doesn't and it shouldn't stop us from going forward. We can't let the fear shape us."

He stared at her, feeling awestruck. "I don't know how you do it," he murmured.

"Do what?" she asked, a bemused smile on her face. He reached up and tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

"You're brilliant, Rose," he told her earnestly. "You think of things in a way that I never could."

She shrugged a shoulder and grinned at him. "I think you could, though. You just have to let go of that fear. Have a little faith in something bigger."

He smiled at her. She was so insightful and she didn't even know it. She was right, of course. Fear was holding him back. If he could let go of that fear, with her by his side, there was no telling what they could accomplish together. They really did make the best sort of team when they worked together. They could be the stuff of legends. He just had to have a little faith. But faith in what? He didn't believe in gods, not as humans did. He'd seen too much in his life, learned too much, done too much. Belief, he thought as he dipped his head down and kissed her, didn't have to be about gods.

After all, if he believed in anything at all, he believed in her.


End file.
